Boyfriend advice & working out

[PowerPrincess]

Hey ladies,

Question - what is your opinion of this situation.

My boyfriend always tells me i'm the most beautiful girl in the world and i don't have to loose any weight. It irks me b/c i'm really trying hard to get myself back into shape and have that confident mindset - and these past couple of days, it's working. However - he seems to take me going to the gym as not a priority - even though it is completely a priority for me.
Another thing, he doesn't work out - he spends sooo much time making money on business deals.

what do you think about this???

 

[wend]

I think you just need to talk to him and explain to him that you really enjoy working out (and seeing the results). It's nice that he likes you as you are, but that doesn't mean you can't seek to improve.

He has no more right to make you not want to work out than you do to try to make him want to work out. (Though, when you REALLY start getting into good shape, it will probably make him want to get in better shape, btw. Setting a good example is the only way to motivate someone else.)

 

[tuc biscuit]

just explain to him it is very important to you

what would be your ideal situation? him going to the gym with you/him supporting you etc.?

 

[T&T]

Is he the jealous type?

 

[Daisy_Girl]

I think Wend is right on. You need to have a heart to heart with him. You need to let him know that it is GREAT he likes you how you are, and that means a lot to you. The supprt he gives you on how you look is important, but so is making yourself feel you from within. You have goals you set for yourself and you want to reach them. This means the gym and eating right is a high priority for you. Compare it to things HE views as a priority....maybe them he will understand where you are coming from.

 

[jenscats5]

Well, he could just not be interested in working out and really does think you look fine & is satisfied with how you look......or.....he could feel threatened that you will look better & attract other men, thus dumping him in the process or is threatened that you found an interest away from him.....or neither....

Talk to him about it & explain to him that it's important to you -- after all you need YOUR time & working out can be YOUR time with yourself.....

If he's just not interested he may become interested.....my hubby got into my routine with me when his "fat belly" or so he calls it really started bothering him & the routine worked (WOW!! what a concept), now he's my workout partner!

 

[PBR]

jenz has brought up a very real point in the first part of her post...not to be negative in any way: I have seen this time and time again, where the male is very threatened by "what could happen if "......the same goes for women on the other hand, but guys that are into fitness are more apt to welcome their significant other getting into shape...men get just as threatened as women do when there is competition (thats what they see) not that there is any- its what is often interpreted...especially men who are not athletic or who dont have that mind set...inferiority complex can set in...this may not be "your" issue at all- just expanding a little on jenz post...

 

[wend]

My husband was more than a tad jealous when I started going to the gym, but he realized that it was important to me, and that if he tried to dissuade me, it would backfire. It was tough for him, I think, but now he's fine with it, and he's really enjoying my physique!

 

[jenscats5]

PBR -- thanks for backing me up! LOL

I agree with Wend -- he may be against it now but when he starts to see how the rewards will benefit HIM, he may become more supportive or at least won't complain as much......

 

[PowerPrincess]

Is he the jealous type?

Yes, definitely.