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Bad joke thread
- Thread starter Dial_tone
- Start date
lowpro said:
A guy with 8 K power walks into a bar
He tells the bartender "I wanna bomb jack_schitt"
The bartender replies "Your making a mistake son...trust me."
lowpro said:
Dude, those keys are WAY far apart. Aside from that, your post made no sense. You should probably put down the crack pipe until tomorrow or the day after.
Three men are drivin thru the desert when their car breaks down. They decide to start walkin so they each grab something to make the trip easier. One guy takes some water so he can drink when he gets thirsty. Second guy takes some food so he can eat when he gets hungry. Third guy bring a car door. The other guys say to him 'why did you bring the car door with you?". Third guy says so when it gets hot I can roll down the window.
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heatherrae
Guest
A rope walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a jack and coke." The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." Dejected, the little rope leaves and comes back with some slick sunglasses and tries a second time. He sits at the bar and says, "I'll take a jack and coke." The bartender starts to make the drink and then recognizes the little fella and, once again says, "We don't serve your kind here."
The little rope is not one to be bullied, so he goes outside and thinks for a minute, runs to the car and gets a trenchcoat and puts it on, puts on different glasses, and then makes a knot at his top and teases the ends of his little rope head to look like an afro.
He saunters back into the bar smoking a cigarette and doing his best to look incognito. The bartender says, "what will it be?" He lowers his voice and says, "Jack and Coke, dude." The bartender gives him the drink and then takes a good long look at the little rope.
"Hey wait a minute! You're that damned rope that was in here twice before, aren't you?"
The little rope cooly crushes out his cigarette and replies, "I'm a frayed knot."
hehehehe...no one ever laughs, but it cracks me the hell up!
The little rope is not one to be bullied, so he goes outside and thinks for a minute, runs to the car and gets a trenchcoat and puts it on, puts on different glasses, and then makes a knot at his top and teases the ends of his little rope head to look like an afro.
He saunters back into the bar smoking a cigarette and doing his best to look incognito. The bartender says, "what will it be?" He lowers his voice and says, "Jack and Coke, dude." The bartender gives him the drink and then takes a good long look at the little rope.
"Hey wait a minute! You're that damned rope that was in here twice before, aren't you?"
The little rope cooly crushes out his cigarette and replies, "I'm a frayed knot."
hehehehe...no one ever laughs, but it cracks me the hell up!
sublime35
New member
What was wrong with the wooden horse?
-It wooden go.
This guy goes down to a big city to visit some freinds. They take him out for a good time and they tell their friend they know this really good hooker, only 20 bucks, best you'll ever have. He says "okay". So they walk up to this old building and tell the guy to go to the top floor and there will be a woman sitting in a rocking chair that will service you. The guy goes up there and sees this old woman in the rocking chair. He says "excuse (kind of embarassed), I'm looking for this woman who is supposed to service me. She puts down her knitting needle and says "that's me, it'll be 20 dollars" he says "i think there's some mistake, i'll go now" she tells him to wait and promises he will leave happy. Thinking what the hell, it's worth a shot, tells the old woman "okay" The old then takes out her fake eye and begins fucking the guy in her eye socket. When she's done he says "Wow, the IS best i've ever had, i'm definately coming back" she said "I'll keep an eye out for you"
-It wooden go.
This guy goes down to a big city to visit some freinds. They take him out for a good time and they tell their friend they know this really good hooker, only 20 bucks, best you'll ever have. He says "okay". So they walk up to this old building and tell the guy to go to the top floor and there will be a woman sitting in a rocking chair that will service you. The guy goes up there and sees this old woman in the rocking chair. He says "excuse (kind of embarassed), I'm looking for this woman who is supposed to service me. She puts down her knitting needle and says "that's me, it'll be 20 dollars" he says "i think there's some mistake, i'll go now" she tells him to wait and promises he will leave happy. Thinking what the hell, it's worth a shot, tells the old woman "okay" The old then takes out her fake eye and begins fucking the guy in her eye socket. When she's done he says "Wow, the IS best i've ever had, i'm definately coming back" she said "I'll keep an eye out for you"
lowpro
New member
jack_schitt said:
First off, I apologize to dial_tone for this guy starting trash in your topic.
Mr. Schitt,
Ooooo, you got me. I had a typo! Yes, gramatics define who we are. Or is it the little green dots? You tell me. The crack pipe joke was smooth as well. At least you stayed on topic with the original thread = bad jokes.
Aside from that, the post made perfect sense. If you're going to quote someone, put in the entire quote. Tell you what, I'll spell it out for you. Get off of your karma high horse and realize that you can try to bully people here all you want. It doesn't say much for your true character. Do you wake up in the morning and look at your karma and say, "life is good?"
Who sits there and bombs a member over and over and over again and then, hits the member who diffuses the bombs with red karma saying, "you think you can take me on?" Who the hell do you think you are? Your some dude behind a keyboard trying to be an internet badass. That's lame bro.
Unplug, go outside and get some sun. You're starting to blur the lines of the internet and reality. You don't have half the class the other karma millionares have.
(insert your fatuous reply here)
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heatherrae
Guest
Thanks lowpro. =-)
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heatherrae
Guest
hehehe...I laughed at that second one.sublime35 said:
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heatherrae
Guest
I laughed at this one to, but I tend to laugh at sad movies, too.Dial_tone said:
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