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Here's a reprint from an article that goes back a way, but I think most of it still hold up.
You May Be Obsessed With Bodybuilding When…
Nelson Montana
To be good – really good – at most anything in life, there comes a time when you have to be a little fanatical. That all consuming desire to succeed becomes a laser-like focus with the goal firmly entrenched in the minds eye. Or something like that. Hey, I’m a bodybuilder. All I know is you have to be a little nuts to step under enough weight to crush a Volkswagon and decide to bend up and down until you want to puke your intestines half way across the gym floor. And like it!
As noble as the quest for a body that resembles a superhero may be, there is a life beyond the gym. (Yeah, really. No lie). If you’ve been wondering if you’re starting to get a little too carried away with an otherwise healthy endeavor, it’s time for a reality check.
Here’s a list of habits that just might be a telltale sign that your love affair with the iron is headed off the deep end.
You may be a little too obsessed with bodybuilding if…
Your neck is the same exact circumference as your head.
The amount you squat exceeds the amount in your bank account.
You completely miss the girl with the fine ass walking by because you were admiring your triceps in the mirror.
You’re hitting a double biceps shot in the picture on your driver’s license.
Someone casually asks how you’re doing and you respond by telling them that your brachailis suck but you think you see a new ripple in your vastus medialis.
You think adding mayonnaise to tuna fish is a treat.
Your traps cover your ears.
You’re seeing a therapist because your lat training just isn’t as satisfying as it used to be.
All your muscle magazines are bound in leather.
You name your children Arnold, Sergio, and Dorian.
You name your children Arnold, Sergio and Dorian, and they’re GIRLS!
You notice a new Smith machine in your gym and get sexually excited.
Your doctor told you not to lift anything heavy for a while so you slapped him.
You send irate letters to the judges of the Mr. West Buttfugg County contest for not picking the guy you thought should have won.
You meet a new woman and within one minute you try to work the words “pecs, sets or reps” into the conversation.
You have a PHD in physics but you choose to be a moving man because you feel carrying loose furniture will really do wonders for your stabilizers .
You called the cable company and asked for a deal on chest expanders.
You skipped your grandfather’s funeral because it was “leg day.”
You can’t understand why Lou Ferrigno never won an Oscar.
You throw away family heirlooms because you need the room for your supplements.
You’ve been off gear for a week and half and figure you’ve cleaned out enough and it’s time for another cycle.
You have pet names for all of your muscles. And address them as such.
Your wife mentions that she thinks Brad Pitt has a nice body and you consider it grounds for divorce.
You do a double split routine so you can get some extra work in on those neglected pinky toes.
Your baby’s crib gym has 45 pound plates.
When people tell you you’ve lost all your aesthetics and just look like a freak, you thank them.
You’re stuck at the desk all day with nothing heavier than a pen, so you decide to curl it for 6,382,704,97 reps.
For Mothers Day, you bought her wrist wraps.
You tape the Super Bowl because at the same time channel 214 is having an interview with Jay Cutler and you want to see it “as it happens.”
Someone says you have to “lighten up” and you respond; “What are you crazy? It’s the off season!”
You cry every time you see the scene in Pumping Iron where Mike Katz can’t find his power twister.
You moved to Canada because you couldn’t bear the thought of one more Thanksgiving Day when the gym is closed.
You won’t marry your supermodel girlfriend because she has skinny forearms and you fear she may pass the genetic trait onto your children.
You actually take advantage of egg protein flatulence to make sure nobody goes near your favorite preacher bench.
You think the term “overtraining” is just a rumor started by Scientologists.
You can’t decide what’s better – sex, or that burn you get on the 25th rep of calve raises.
All your suits are sleeveless.
If any of the above sounds like it may describe you,..you are indeed, obsessed with bodybuilding. Welcome to the club.
__________________
You May Be Obsessed With Bodybuilding When…
Nelson Montana
To be good – really good – at most anything in life, there comes a time when you have to be a little fanatical. That all consuming desire to succeed becomes a laser-like focus with the goal firmly entrenched in the minds eye. Or something like that. Hey, I’m a bodybuilder. All I know is you have to be a little nuts to step under enough weight to crush a Volkswagon and decide to bend up and down until you want to puke your intestines half way across the gym floor. And like it!
As noble as the quest for a body that resembles a superhero may be, there is a life beyond the gym. (Yeah, really. No lie). If you’ve been wondering if you’re starting to get a little too carried away with an otherwise healthy endeavor, it’s time for a reality check.
Here’s a list of habits that just might be a telltale sign that your love affair with the iron is headed off the deep end.
You may be a little too obsessed with bodybuilding if…
Your neck is the same exact circumference as your head.
The amount you squat exceeds the amount in your bank account.
You completely miss the girl with the fine ass walking by because you were admiring your triceps in the mirror.
You’re hitting a double biceps shot in the picture on your driver’s license.
Someone casually asks how you’re doing and you respond by telling them that your brachailis suck but you think you see a new ripple in your vastus medialis.
You think adding mayonnaise to tuna fish is a treat.
Your traps cover your ears.
You’re seeing a therapist because your lat training just isn’t as satisfying as it used to be.
All your muscle magazines are bound in leather.
You name your children Arnold, Sergio, and Dorian.
You name your children Arnold, Sergio and Dorian, and they’re GIRLS!
You notice a new Smith machine in your gym and get sexually excited.
Your doctor told you not to lift anything heavy for a while so you slapped him.
You send irate letters to the judges of the Mr. West Buttfugg County contest for not picking the guy you thought should have won.
You meet a new woman and within one minute you try to work the words “pecs, sets or reps” into the conversation.
You have a PHD in physics but you choose to be a moving man because you feel carrying loose furniture will really do wonders for your stabilizers .
You called the cable company and asked for a deal on chest expanders.
You skipped your grandfather’s funeral because it was “leg day.”
You can’t understand why Lou Ferrigno never won an Oscar.
You throw away family heirlooms because you need the room for your supplements.
You’ve been off gear for a week and half and figure you’ve cleaned out enough and it’s time for another cycle.
You have pet names for all of your muscles. And address them as such.
Your wife mentions that she thinks Brad Pitt has a nice body and you consider it grounds for divorce.
You do a double split routine so you can get some extra work in on those neglected pinky toes.
Your baby’s crib gym has 45 pound plates.
When people tell you you’ve lost all your aesthetics and just look like a freak, you thank them.
You’re stuck at the desk all day with nothing heavier than a pen, so you decide to curl it for 6,382,704,97 reps.
For Mothers Day, you bought her wrist wraps.
You tape the Super Bowl because at the same time channel 214 is having an interview with Jay Cutler and you want to see it “as it happens.”
Someone says you have to “lighten up” and you respond; “What are you crazy? It’s the off season!”
You cry every time you see the scene in Pumping Iron where Mike Katz can’t find his power twister.
You moved to Canada because you couldn’t bear the thought of one more Thanksgiving Day when the gym is closed.
You won’t marry your supermodel girlfriend because she has skinny forearms and you fear she may pass the genetic trait onto your children.
You actually take advantage of egg protein flatulence to make sure nobody goes near your favorite preacher bench.
You think the term “overtraining” is just a rumor started by Scientologists.
You can’t decide what’s better – sex, or that burn you get on the 25th rep of calve raises.
All your suits are sleeveless.
If any of the above sounds like it may describe you,..you are indeed, obsessed with bodybuilding. Welcome to the club.
__________________
