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HappyScrappy
New member
I got an e-mail from the chick in charge of our alumni news for my class. People always write in that they are doctors now and how great their life is - so I just make up horrible stories of drug addiction and selling myself on the streets to get by.
I figure that's far more entertaining than hearing about one more rich kid joining the peace corps.
In the years since I've graduated, the closest they've ever come to printing anything about me was that I was sending stuff too offensive for print, but that I was out there.
Here is my most recent submission (the girl in charge of all of this has been out of the country for a few months, so this is the first one she is taking charge of now that she is back, so I figured I'd just sort of touch base to see how she is doing).
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Date: Fri, 22 Nov 2002 11:37:53 -0500 (EST)
From: HappyScrappy <[email protected]>
To: TheChickWeWriteTo <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: class notes
I have nothing to report.
I've still got that job as a janitor in New Mexico. The kids throw things
at me, but I'm just glad to be off of drugs and out of prison - especially
in this economy.
I've learned a lot about life and love in this past year, and also I
learned how to swim.
these are things that you can't always pick up in college, what with the
heavy drinking and all, so I'm thankful for it all.
the crabs are all cleared up, the docs tell me that what they thought was
leprocy was really just a mistake and I should shower more. from what I
gather, the herpes is here to stay, but the open sores do leave a reminder
(albeit a painful one) of the friends I made while hitchiking across the
south west while avoiding the DEA.
I've also found salvation through religion. I worhsip the sun god ra and
sacrafice the homeless every other full moon in order to prevent
earthquakes.
and knitting. I knit. mostly hats out of discarded shoelaces and dirt.
lots of brown hats. I'm thinking of selling them on eBay - but I am not
entirely sure that I'm not still banned from there after attempting to
sell off all of my redundant organs in exchange for Ninetendo games.
you know, same old, same old.
Yours in sport, life, and friendship forever,
Enrico Pullatzo, Class of '99
I figure that's far more entertaining than hearing about one more rich kid joining the peace corps.
In the years since I've graduated, the closest they've ever come to printing anything about me was that I was sending stuff too offensive for print, but that I was out there.
Here is my most recent submission (the girl in charge of all of this has been out of the country for a few months, so this is the first one she is taking charge of now that she is back, so I figured I'd just sort of touch base to see how she is doing).
-----------------------------------------------------------
Date: Fri, 22 Nov 2002 11:37:53 -0500 (EST)
From: HappyScrappy <[email protected]>
To: TheChickWeWriteTo <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: class notes
I have nothing to report.
I've still got that job as a janitor in New Mexico. The kids throw things
at me, but I'm just glad to be off of drugs and out of prison - especially
in this economy.
I've learned a lot about life and love in this past year, and also I
learned how to swim.
these are things that you can't always pick up in college, what with the
heavy drinking and all, so I'm thankful for it all.
the crabs are all cleared up, the docs tell me that what they thought was
leprocy was really just a mistake and I should shower more. from what I
gather, the herpes is here to stay, but the open sores do leave a reminder
(albeit a painful one) of the friends I made while hitchiking across the
south west while avoiding the DEA.
I've also found salvation through religion. I worhsip the sun god ra and
sacrafice the homeless every other full moon in order to prevent
earthquakes.
and knitting. I knit. mostly hats out of discarded shoelaces and dirt.
lots of brown hats. I'm thinking of selling them on eBay - but I am not
entirely sure that I'm not still banned from there after attempting to
sell off all of my redundant organs in exchange for Ninetendo games.
you know, same old, same old.
Yours in sport, life, and friendship forever,
Enrico Pullatzo, Class of '99
