Because my friend is a dipshit. Friday night we went out and pounded down beers. It wasn't a typical, have a few beers night, we pretty much drank ourselves stupid. My roommate drove us home from the bar, and when we got their my friend disappeared outside. I went out front, only to see the dickhead trying to open his car door. I went over to tell him that we should just chill for a few hours before he went home... he disagreed, and started getting pissed. I took his keys from him and threw them towards the park across the street from my house. He pushes me back about 40 yards, yelling and screaming that he is going to kick the shit out of me. Then he swung at me, and connected. This is when I realized that I had to fight my friend of 10 years. So I did. I swung at him, hitting his face, then threw him down to the ground where I started to issue an asskicking. This is one of those loser friends, that you know deep down is a good guy, but one that needs help. He's 23, doesn't have a job, lives at home with his mom, takes advantage of her and everyone else around him. Comes over to my house to drink all my beer, and smoke all my pot. I figured an asskicking is what may help. So, everything is going well, he's on the ground, kicking at my legs to try and get me away. This is when he invited kicking into the fight. So, I procede to take half kicks at his sides, back, arms, legs, a few headshots, telling him he needs to start showing respect for the people that love him. At this time, he starts crying, pleading that he will. He's laying in the middle of the street, and I have my boot on the side of his head, holding it down, while I continue on with my lecture and a few more light kicks to help keep his attention. That's when a car turns on to my street, and ends up being 2 neighbors down from me. They get out of the car and ask if we need help. I politely tell them no thank you, but my friend cried out, please call 911. The wife goes in the house to call 911, so I leave him in the street and go inside. Of course, 5 minutes later my door is getting banged on, and my house is lit up like a Christmas tree.
The Cops call my house, and on my answering machine tell me that I should just come outside, and face the aggravated assault charges that await me. This is what I don't understand. He tells me that they'll mail my arrest warrant to me, and I'll face further charges for not answering the door..
This makes no sense. An hour after I stopped my friend from driving, the cops gave him a breathalyzer to see if he could drive home. He blew a .157, almost twice the legal amount, considered an Extreme DUI. Yet, if I had gone outside, I would have gone to jail for assault!!! The cops finally leave, but first call the dipshit's mom to come pick him up her dumbass kid. Now, the 23 year old dipshit is grounded!!! I spoke with his mom later that night, she thanked me for stopping him from driving, and said that no charges will be pressed, as he admitted I acted in self defense after he got violent with me (He weighs 50 pounds more than myself). But now, I'm out of the gym with a boxers fracture to my hand, which puts me out of the gym for 6-8 weeks.
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The Cops call my house, and on my answering machine tell me that I should just come outside, and face the aggravated assault charges that await me. This is what I don't understand. He tells me that they'll mail my arrest warrant to me, and I'll face further charges for not answering the door..





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