Recent content by Wounded and Toothless

plifter - life with a small pecker and Winona's used skirt.

Associate, My dearest friend HelenSL (bold where necessary) asked me to lend an ear to your woes. I promptly snatched her throat out with my bare hands, raised my fist to the moon and recited the lyrics to "Sister Christian" by Night Ranger. As I felt bad about my actions later on, I thought I...

Wow, and just like hotbuffet - you're a dumb slut with a bunch of idiots karmally ejaculating on your profile. Kudos, fuckpipe.

If I had a car, it would be a Lada. The test drive would involve me running you down. Dig it.

Bionic Commando.

I can think of many tools I could use to extract the truth out of your heathen skull. Like my kukri.

Children 'round these parts still tell stories of his legendary farmer's walk with two morbidly obese women. Word has it that he was whistling "Tennessee" the whole time. Truly an inspiration to us all.

www.myshantytown.com

Hello. Do you like Arrested Development?

Introduce the sexual version of modified lawn darts to the bedroom. Hang sharpened lawn darts from the ceiling with flimsy pieces of yarn. As the headboard bangs against the wall, said lawn darts will shimmy back and forth. The possibility of her having her abdomen or spine punctured will...

MY HIV test is simple. I just slam someone in the side with a syringe full of my blood, then wait to see if the AIDS lesions form. I'm sure there are quicker ways, but this is the most entertaining.

I still have half of my comatose associate's pancreas in my freezer. It's a few years old now, methinks the food bank might take it.

Funny, I'm an idiot.

Well, my life is shattered.

I'm HelenSL, fuckpipe. Best be showing me some respect.