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Hiatussin
New member
I haven´t been posting much lately, luckily, but these boards are still perfect for a varied, partially anonymous opinion on things.
I´m going to try and keep this short.
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I´m 19, turning 20 in a week. She is 18.
I´m in uni, she´s in the senior year of HS, she goes to the same school I went to.
We´ve been together as each other´s first for over two years now.
We live about a 4 hour travel apart, see each other about 5 days a month or so and keep contact over the net and phone otherwise.
She is coming to the same town to study next year, partially since I live here. She´s even already subscribed. We grew up in Holland and I now study in Belgium, where she knows noone else and is coming too. It´s a big step, it would mean we are very serious. We´ve done vacations, we know each others parents and siblings well, we talk.
She has always been honest about having a specific thing for males that are older than her. She says she´s partially with me since I look and act older than I am.
We are exceptionally brutally honest with one another. I´ll tell her anything and I had the idea this was mutual.
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Now lately she has been uncomfortable and she said she didn´t feel like she can say everything on her mind. I squeeze it out of her and she confesses that
She has been having strong, obsessive, recurring sexual fantasies about her chemistry teacher at school. (He is 55, married, kinda fat, has no chin and speaks like a sloth. Furthermore he has a certain resemblance to Rowan Atkinson. I was in his class for four years, and made two trips to England together with him)
She admits it´s reached a point where she transpires when speaking to him and can´t pay attention in class. She also chose him as her personal mentor and he accompanied her to an internship in a company for a week last month. She says that during this time it was "like father/daughter" (she has a very weak father who means little to her, daddy issues) This attraction has existed for 3/4 of a year now, 9 months. She swears it never went beyond thoughts.
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I read her the riot act. I pointed out how I told her honestly and willingly whenever one day I had 1% attraction to someone, how honest I always was about everything in general.
I told her I have my perverted thoughts, but they never circle around one specific third person for a long time. That if they did, I would certainly tell her immediately, make up my mind and sort it out.
Furthermore I´m stumped and smashed by the guy in question. There´s just nothing about him, regardless his age. I recall his obvious bad breath and his dullness and how lame his daughter was.
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She also keeps saying how she feels inferior around me and my friends and how she keeps feeling she´s not clever enough and blabla. She´s insecure.
I talked to her on the phone for about an hour yesterday and I was very calm and rational and hard and basically explained she needs to get her shit together. She´s coming over this weekend.
what the fuck do I do now?
I´m going to try and keep this short.
-------------------------------------
I´m 19, turning 20 in a week. She is 18.
I´m in uni, she´s in the senior year of HS, she goes to the same school I went to.
We´ve been together as each other´s first for over two years now.
We live about a 4 hour travel apart, see each other about 5 days a month or so and keep contact over the net and phone otherwise.
She is coming to the same town to study next year, partially since I live here. She´s even already subscribed. We grew up in Holland and I now study in Belgium, where she knows noone else and is coming too. It´s a big step, it would mean we are very serious. We´ve done vacations, we know each others parents and siblings well, we talk.
She has always been honest about having a specific thing for males that are older than her. She says she´s partially with me since I look and act older than I am.
We are exceptionally brutally honest with one another. I´ll tell her anything and I had the idea this was mutual.
--------------------------
Now lately she has been uncomfortable and she said she didn´t feel like she can say everything on her mind. I squeeze it out of her and she confesses that
She has been having strong, obsessive, recurring sexual fantasies about her chemistry teacher at school. (He is 55, married, kinda fat, has no chin and speaks like a sloth. Furthermore he has a certain resemblance to Rowan Atkinson. I was in his class for four years, and made two trips to England together with him)
She admits it´s reached a point where she transpires when speaking to him and can´t pay attention in class. She also chose him as her personal mentor and he accompanied her to an internship in a company for a week last month. She says that during this time it was "like father/daughter" (she has a very weak father who means little to her, daddy issues) This attraction has existed for 3/4 of a year now, 9 months. She swears it never went beyond thoughts.
-------------------------------------
I read her the riot act. I pointed out how I told her honestly and willingly whenever one day I had 1% attraction to someone, how honest I always was about everything in general.
I told her I have my perverted thoughts, but they never circle around one specific third person for a long time. That if they did, I would certainly tell her immediately, make up my mind and sort it out.
Furthermore I´m stumped and smashed by the guy in question. There´s just nothing about him, regardless his age. I recall his obvious bad breath and his dullness and how lame his daughter was.
------------------------------
She also keeps saying how she feels inferior around me and my friends and how she keeps feeling she´s not clever enough and blabla. She´s insecure.
I talked to her on the phone for about an hour yesterday and I was very calm and rational and hard and basically explained she needs to get her shit together. She´s coming over this weekend.
what the fuck do I do now?
