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Went on a date last night.

  • Thread starter Thread starter Golfer18--old
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Golfer18--old

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I go on a date with this girl. We went to go play putt putt. She is talking shit to me the whole time about how i am gonna get beat. So we go and play and I am killing her. Anyway the fuck face windmill eat my balls so we just decided to leave and go to a movie. So we get to the movie and she is saying some little smart ass comments messing with me. So we started talking about sex. She asked how I think it would feel with her. I told her its like getting a new bike for xmas. You want it so bad you cant help yourself. Once you ride it your in love with it. So she started laughing and starts throwing some crazy eyes at me. I just thought she was doing some flirting. So we drive back to my car cause we met up halfway. We get out and are just talking for about ten minutes. So I tell her I am going home because she hasn't really gave me any signs. So I am walking around my car and she says "hey." So i turn around and she asked me where I was going. I told her I am going home and she asked if I wanted to go to her house. So I was like yeah lets go. So I follow her home. We get to her house and I walk in and her Mom is sitting on the couch at 12 o'clock waiting on her younger sister to get home. So I was like fuck. I could just see her mom thinking, but she was nice. So she walks in her room and I wanted to walk in there but not with her Mom chilling there. So finally she tells "you can come in here." So I go in there and we are just chilling. She tells me she wants to feel my stomach so she starts rubbing it. So she was going maybe two inched below my boxer briefs while rubbing my stomach. Talking about how its nice. So her hand gets tired and I start tickling her back. She is laying on her back with her ass in the air. I have never seen a fucking site as beautiful as this. It was so beautiful I couldn't think straight. She has on these black stretch pants with a built in belt. So after a while I can't take anymore of the bullshit tickling and I start running my hand down the inside of thigh. I notice she starts anticipating it and moves closer and closer to my hand. So after playing with her mind I slide my hand down there. So I am trying to unbutton her pants for fucking five minutes and she finally tells me they unzip in the back. So instead of her unzipping she strips down to nothing. So I start fingering her. I had to give her the hand over the head smell test to check things out. Something every guy should do. So she gets on top of me dry riding me. That shit pretty much blew. So I pull out a fucking Lifestyles kiss of mint. I do not know if you can use these for fucking but I did. It felt like my dick was wrapped in electrical tape but its the only one I had. She is on top and we can't get it in. I know it was that condom. So she tells me get on top. So I start hitting it from the top. Now here is the shit that I can't beleive we did. We are both 19 but I doubt her parents condome fucking in their house when they are there. The door was open and her Mom and Dads door was open right next to her room. She has this steel headboard bullshit that hits the wall so I am having to fuck her and hold the head board. After five minutes my arms were shaking. So I know I started hitting it at close to 3 cause the grandfather clock went off. So I look at the clock by the door and it around 3:09. I can't feel jack shit with this condom. So every ten seconds I am looking to see if her dad had a gun pointed at me and she starts saying "I am bout to come" in this funny ass voice. It sounded kinda like this "Ima Ima Bout to to come." So then she comes. So I am nowhere near where I am about to because of this piece of shit condom. I go for five more minutes and she says its starting to hurt. Pretty shitty for me. So I stop. Nothing else really happened. I didn't even bust a nut. She got hers and acted like a biotch. She could have atleast gave me a blowjob or at the very least a hand job. So she starts to get all huggy and kissy and shit so I thought it was time to leave. I start putting on my shit. I am pretty pissed that she acted so selfish. I am gonna have to lay down the fucking law and let her know whats up from now on. I am interested in how many times this is happened to us guys. I thought it was gonna be a lot better when I saw that ass on her. Maybe it will get better.....
 
just use the withdrawl method....never use a condom unless she is some negro loving slut who bangs black guys
 
damn. that was a pretty good read.

i've only not gotten off once. it's a hilarious story but i dont feel like typing it right now.
 
Re: Re: Went on a date last night.

prophet said:
just use the withdrawl method....never use a condom unless she is some negro loving slut who bangs black guys

Fuck that bro. I do not a need a kid. Maybe when I get out of college I will use the withdraw method more freely.:)
 
I wish I could draw how her ass looked while she was laying on her stomach. It was so nice I was getting nervous hitting it. I was telling myself "Damn I am gonna hit that." And then the asshole in me was saying "I am gonna turn that shit out." The asshole always wins.
 
Re: Re: Re: Went on a date last night.

Golfer18 said:


Fuck that bro. I do not a need a kid. Maybe when I get out of college I will use the withdraw method more freely.:)

"its not mine" thats what you say and then pay for the abortion....they're cheap enough these days
 
Good fucking job man. At least you got laid and got to be all over that beautiful ass.

I've had that happen quite a bit where I was having sex and didn't come. It happens to me a lot with when I'm with someone relatively new and of course condoms fuck it all up even though they're a necessary evil. If I fuck without a condom- damn, it feels so good and is such a turnon but I'll worry so much afterward that it's never worth it. Considering an average guy releases 150- 300 million sperm every time he ejaculates I wouldn't rely on pulling out too much, even though I guess it's better than nothing.

Did it not bother her at all that you didn't come? Every time I don't get off, it always fucks with the girl pretty bad. That's weird that she didn't give a shit.

Anyway, good story and good job.
 
Last edited:
prophet said:
actually just beat her she'll have a miscarriage

You know the ab exercise when its a bar with wheels on it and you roll out and extend your arms then come back. I was in that position. Now that I think of it the pussy was good but the action sucked.
 
casavant said:
Good fucking job man. At least you got laid and got to be all over that beautiful ass.

I've had that happen quite a bit where I was having sex and didn't come. It happens to me a lot with when I with someone relatively new and of course condoms fuck it all up even though they're a necessary evil. If I fuck without a condom- damn, it feels so good and is such a turnon but I'll worry so much afterward that it's never worth it. Considering an average guy releases 150- 300 million sperm every time he ejaculates I wouldn't rely on pulling out too much, even though I guess it's better than nothing.

Did it not bother her at all that you didn't come? Every time I don't get
off, it always fucks with the girl pretty bad. That's weird that she didn't give a shit.

Anyway, good story and good job.


Yeah after reading your boucning post I feel like we both got fucked last night. Me literally but not really and you really did but not literally. She text messaged my cell today asking If I regret it. I said no. I wish I would have said "regret what I never got mine so there is nothing to regret."
 
Golfer18 said:



Yeah after reading your boucning post I feel like we both got fucked last night. Me literally but not really and you really did but not literally. She text messaged my cell today asking If I regret it. I said no. I wish I would have said "regret what I never got mine so there is nothing to regret."

I hear that.

So did you take care of it yourself when you got home? I have to. Shit man, this falls into the "too much info" category, but I have so much pent up shit after sleeping with a girl but not fucking or fucking a girl but not coming that I have to get rid of it to get to sleep and not feel fucking homicidal.
 
casavant said:


I hear that.

So did you take care of it yourself when you got home? I have to. Shit man, this falls into the "too much info" category, but I have so much pent up shit after sleeping with a girl but not fucking or fucking a girl but not coming that I have to get rid of it to get to sleep and not feel fucking homicidal.

It was like a 40 minute drive home. I had deep thought going on. By the time I got home I was tired so I said fuck it. I am still feeling like I need to do something though.:)
 
From the whole date she sounds like a headgame playing slut. She wouldnt even finish you off, that itself is a sign to dump her ass. I dont care how good it looks.
 
superdave said:
From the whole date she sounds like a headgame playing slut. She wouldnt even finish you off, that itself is a sign to dump her ass. I dont care how good it looks.


Yeah I have thought about that. That was her one and only strike.
 
jesus 2 said:
did you even ask her if she could make you pop since you completed her orgasm? or just pack up?


j2da2

Im not a packer but I got up and left. She getting cuddly on me.
 
Golfer18 said:


Im not a packer but I got up and left. She getting cuddly on me.

Man, I'm a fucking sucker for cuddling, ironically enough. Hell, I can snuggle with a chick I barely know and then I'll start feeling all affectionate in the moment- I'm not talking about "I love yous" and shit like that of course- but I'll be totally digging the whole situation and at the same time I'll be thinking, "What the fuck? I barely know this chick." Then the spell wears off the next day and I'll feel fake. I fucking hate that.
 
casavant said:


Man, I'm a fucking sucker for cuddling, ironically enough. Hell, I can snuggle with a chick I barely know and then I'll start feeling all affectionate in the moment- I'm not talking about "I love yous" and shit like that of course- but I'll be totally digging the whole situation and at the same time I'll be thinking, "What the fuck? I barely know this chick." Then the spell wears off the next day and I'll feel fake. I fucking hate that.

Hahha I know what you mean. I felt like a bitch today cause usually I would have told her no fuck that she is getting me off.
 
More importantly, what does her mom look like?

I bet the dirty slut was watching you fuck her daughter.....can't believe the door was open, you two in there and she didn't know what was going on.
 
vinylgroover said:
More importantly, what does her mom look like?

I bet the dirty slut was watching you fuck her daughter.....can't believe the door was open, you two in there and she didn't know what was going on.

Her mom is straight. I CANNOT believe I did that. I was asking for her dad to beat the living shit out of me. She told me today that her brother asked her "what was all that banging going on in your room last night?" I will never take that risk again. Jesus, imagine her dad, no matter how much bigger I was than he he would have killed me. Everytime I think of doing that with the door open I get a weird feeling, kinda like when you think about a life threatening situation that has happened.
 
vinylgroover said:
More importantly, what does her mom look like?

I bet the dirty slut was watching you fuck her daughter.....can't believe the door was open, you two in there and she didn't know what was going on.

if the daughter is a slut the mom is too
 
superdave said:
that itself is a sign to dump her ass. I dont care how good it looks.

i'd Tapp That again before you make any decisions. especially a beautiful ass.
 
Golfer! You have been here for a year and don't know the rules at Elite?

I'll lay them down for you:

The girl must have a hot ass body, this will include tits for the tit men around here.

She must administer head and be damned good at it, this is for the oralists around here.

You must announce you have a 9" dick, that is for the gays around here. OK....it is for everybody.

You have got to shoot your wad on her face, C would appreciate it if you shot into her eyeballs. Goatslayer likes it when you follow sex with decapitation.

She must tell her friends what a stud you are so that future sequels are readily available.



We will let your indiscretions slide this time due to your youth.
 
Testosterone boy said:
Golfer! You have been here for a year and don't know the rules at Elite?

I'll lay them down for you:

The girl must have a hot ass body, this will include tits for the tit men around here.

She must administer head and be damned good at it, this is for the oralists around here.

You must announce you have a 9" dick, that is for the gays around here. OK....it is for everybody.

You have got to shoot your wad on her face, C would appreciate it if you shot into her eyeballs. Goatslayer likes it when you follow sex with decapitation.

She must tell her friends what a stud you are so that future sequels are readily available.



We will let your indiscretions slide this time due to your youth.


Thanks for lettting me slide. This girl isn't a slut. I think its cause I was acting like a perfect gentlemen. Being an ass doesn't let you get in there for the first time. The next time I'll be an ass if she doesn't get me off.
 
mylife said:



c'mon now. she let you bang her on the 1st date at her house with her door wide open, parents across the hall. she's def a slut.

Well we have known each other for four weeks. We have went places togethor as I guess friend but this is the first that we went out and its been me and her. I don't think she is a slut honestly. It was pretty tight. LIke trying to fuck a wall.
 
Golfer18 said:


Well we have known each other for four weeks. We have went places togethor as I guess friend but this is the first that we went out and its been me and her. I don't think she is a slut honestly. It was pretty tight. LIke trying to fuck a wall.

ohh. i thought you just met her last night.


maybe she's not a slut, but she's definitely way too gullible.
 
mylife said:


ohh. i thought you just met her last night.


maybe she's not a slut, but she's definitely way too gullible.


Nah bro, I am just a Pussy Crook.:)
 
where do you manage to meet all these fucked up chicks? (fucked up chicks... talk about redundant)

and why the hell didnt you just close the door???
a lot of work i know, but jeez
 
I meet them everywhere. The mall, school, the gym. Only about 1 in 3 are really fucked up. Yeah no shit It was easy to shut the door. I guess I just wasn't thinking with my head.

SSM I don't think it would fly.........


Me pounding that ass on tv would be cool. I am sure homo's like Nathan would love to see me.
 
I didnt read all the shit in this thread, just the title, but was curious... what was his name?

Did he get a BJ like lilperonis?
 
supernav said:
Uhh...

If it was that much of a problem, why didn't you lie down next to her, having your face to her face, start kissing her, the other hand around her shoulder and down, fingering her, and your other hand jerking yourself off? You're already there, butt naked, lying next to one another. Just make out with her, and jerk yourself into total abyss. ANYTHING's better than walking out with unfinished business.

If not, go find a pie in the kitchen.

-= nav =-

She was in the cuddling mood. I could tell she was completely done. I think I should have done more. It doesn't matter the break is coming up and I'll be hitting that for breakfast, brunch, lunch, and dinner.:)
 
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