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This pre-booty call agreement (hereinafter referred to as the "Agreement") is entered into on the _____ day of __________, 2001, by____________________, between ___________________ and ____________________.
THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:
1- No sleeping over -- unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.
2- No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.
3- No calls before 9pm -- we don't have anything to talk about.
4- None of that "lovemaking" bullcrap -- only mind-blowing sex allowed.
5- No emotional discussions -- e.g., Do you like me? Don't you want to be with me? Do you love me? The answer is always NO... so don't ask.
6- No plans made in advance -- that is why you are called "The Backup," or "The Whatever." Unless you are from out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.
7- All gifts accepted -- money is always good.
8- No baby talk -- however, dirty talk is highly encouraged.
9- No asking for comparisons with former lovers -- it's really none of your business.
10- No calling each other "friends with privileges" -- we are not friends, just sex buddies.
11- Calling out the wrong name during sex is okay -- don't be offended.
12- No extra clothing -- I don't want you leaving anything behind when you leave.
13- No falling asleep right after sex -- it's over, so get yourself up and go home.
14- Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it -- I don't care.
15- You can not borrow my car for any reason.
16- If anyone asks who you are, one of the standard responses will be: My roommate's girlfriend; The Whatever; or P.O.A.
17- Doggie style preferred -- let me hit it hard and right or get the hell out!
18- Reason for doggie style: the less eye contact the better. I don't want to look in your face.
19- We hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes ME -- so don't keep calling.
20- The most important one -- no condoms, no sex.
21- Bring your own drinks -- I am not your liquor store.
22- No phone use, please -- don't want anyone calling back looking for you.
EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALL
The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this Agreement, it will automatically become null and void and you will then be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from phone memory and e-mail list -- BLOCKED from all communications until your silly butt understands the rules.
Participating Party
Signature________________________
Date: __________
Participating Party
Signature________________________
Date: __________
THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:
1- No sleeping over -- unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.
2- No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.
3- No calls before 9pm -- we don't have anything to talk about.
4- None of that "lovemaking" bullcrap -- only mind-blowing sex allowed.
5- No emotional discussions -- e.g., Do you like me? Don't you want to be with me? Do you love me? The answer is always NO... so don't ask.
6- No plans made in advance -- that is why you are called "The Backup," or "The Whatever." Unless you are from out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.
7- All gifts accepted -- money is always good.
8- No baby talk -- however, dirty talk is highly encouraged.
9- No asking for comparisons with former lovers -- it's really none of your business.
10- No calling each other "friends with privileges" -- we are not friends, just sex buddies.
11- Calling out the wrong name during sex is okay -- don't be offended.
12- No extra clothing -- I don't want you leaving anything behind when you leave.
13- No falling asleep right after sex -- it's over, so get yourself up and go home.
14- Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it -- I don't care.
15- You can not borrow my car for any reason.
16- If anyone asks who you are, one of the standard responses will be: My roommate's girlfriend; The Whatever; or P.O.A.
17- Doggie style preferred -- let me hit it hard and right or get the hell out!
18- Reason for doggie style: the less eye contact the better. I don't want to look in your face.
19- We hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes ME -- so don't keep calling.
20- The most important one -- no condoms, no sex.
21- Bring your own drinks -- I am not your liquor store.
22- No phone use, please -- don't want anyone calling back looking for you.
EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALL
The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this Agreement, it will automatically become null and void and you will then be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from phone memory and e-mail list -- BLOCKED from all communications until your silly butt understands the rules.
Participating Party
Signature________________________
Date: __________
Participating Party
Signature________________________
Date: __________
