That's It CATS SUCK!!! Dogs Rule!!!

[curling]

I have had it with those stupid animals. They are USELESS!!! My stupid cat always meows to go outside meows to go inside meows for food and meows just to piss me off. Then we have this other stupid cat that is almost cat but not quite so it must be called a kitcat. An that that stupid pussy is in heat so my wife tells me because it meows real loud all the time like its in pain. I am fixing to service it with one of those super pencils just to shut it up.

Now the other one that I was talking about first has been in the family sucking me dry for its can food because it won't eat dry food for 15 years. And this moring I was going to work and I said "here Felix"(what an original name my wife come up with there huh for its dumbass) hoping to get some effection and a prrr before I go to work and that cat just looks at me like, whatever like I am going to run up to your ass. I got so disgusted I said out loud(hope my neighbors didn't hear) "Your're an ASSHOLE felix the cat. And I think you suck. You just wait until you meow next time to come in or to get food. I am going to pretend you're a black fury ass football and see how far I can drop kick you in the kitchen. And then when your goofball owner(my wife) is out of town I am going to go turn you in to the vet so they can put your ass to sleep with a big ass needle and I am going to laugh and then I am going to get a dog because I never wanted you pussy ass in the first place."

Then I aimed my truck at it put it in gear and started to try to run it over. Well sure enough then he wakes up from his cocky stance and runs behind a tree where I couldn't hit it. Since I didn't want to bang up my truck since my wife's suburban is STILL in the shop I stopped trying to run it over.

 

[notoriousQQ]

I didn't even read what you wrote. Somehow i feel that i probably have a few extra moments in my day that i can waste on something important. like pooping.

 

[pintoca]

wait till Jen read this... some blood will be hitting the gutter...

 

[Sassy69]

Well I love my kitty. He eats dry food but prefers tuna. He's always there when I come home, only occassionally yakks on the floor, never pees or poos on the floor, though he tracks kittylitter everywhere & sheds like its his personal purpose in life to cover the world in black hair.

I'd love to have a dog, but given my lifestyle, the cat works.

 

[awittyusername]

So, I take it the cats don't like freeway wheelies.

 

[powerslave]

So, I take it the cats don't like freeway wheelies.

 

[Whiskey]

cat nip bor. Sprinkle cat nip on its dry food and give it "NOTHING" else. It'll it eat. Gotta love cats. Dogs are dumb and will do anything for you to like them... cats however... More like a woman

Whiskey

 

[curling]

So, I take it the cats don't like freeway wheelies.

Thanks for bringing that up I couldn't think of a way to put it in this thread. I am sure missing riding the rocket.

 

[notoriousQQ]

lol. i always knew you liked riding the rocket.

Thanks for bringing that up I couldn't think of a way to put it in this thread. I am sure missing riding the rocket.

 

[curling]

lol. i always knew you liked riding the rocket.

I would say "crotch" rocket to clarify but for some reason I think that would make it worse. How about sport bike.

 

[notoriousQQ]

you already said a mouthful

 

[string_bean00]

If you don't give it canned food, it will be forced to eat the dry food...or starve to death. It's simple man.

 

[jnevin]

I'm definitely not a cat person. When I have a property bog enough I plan to have 7 dogs. 5 of them dobies. I love dogs, they just go with the flow, the little things make them happy, no ammonia in their piss, etc.

 

[jenscats5]

wait till Jen read this... some blood will be hitting the gutter...

Really....

Watch him start a thread after getting a dog bitching about how he hates having to walk the dog, the dog digging up the backyard, leaving shit all over the backyard, etc.....

 

[curling]

Really....

Watch him start a thread after getting a dog bitching about how he hates having to walk the dog, the dog digging up the backyard, leaving shit all over the backyard, etc.....

Good point. Maybe I will get one of those pet rocks. Do they still have them. Or I could get a snake and some kangeroos drink some beer and watch the fun.

 

[AAP]

curling + painkillers + cats + moving vehicle = awesome threads.

 

[jenscats5]

Good point. Maybe I will get one of those pet rocks. Do they still have them. Or I could get a snake and some kangeroos drink some beer and watch the fun.

It's funny you mention pet rocks -- cuz I was going to say that if you had one of them you'd find something about it to bitch about....

 

[hamstershaver]

i liked my last cat, till it got cat-napped by the ex, except for the part where it ruined all my blinds

 

[jnevin]

curling + painkillers + cats + moving vehicle = awesome threads.

lol

 

[curling]

It's funny you mention pet rocks -- cuz I was going to say that if you had one of them you'd find something about it to bitch about....

Like what..."this dang rock just lies there."

 

[jenscats5]

Like what..."this dang rock just lies there."

Exactly!! And "I spent all this dang money on it & it does nothing! Now the wife wants another one to keep the other one company & my dang credit card is maxed out again."

 

[curling]

Exactly!! And "I spent all this dang money on it & it does nothing! Now the wife wants another one to keep the other one company & my dang credit card is maxed out again."

LOL and btw these words of wisdom I think you will enjoy:

If you want someone who will bring you the paper without first tearing it apart to remove the sports section .. buy a dog.

If you want someone willing to make a fool of himself simply over the joy of seeing you ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never says its not quite as good as his mother made it ... buy a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ... buy a dog.

If you want someone to scare away burglars, without a lethal weapon which terrifies you and endangers the lives of your family and all the neighbors ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you and watch a romantic movie ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get up on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually ... buy a dog.

But on the other hand, If you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night, only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness, Then, my friend . . .

Buy a cat.

(Any resemblance to a man is purely coincidental)

 

[jnevin]

Nice.

 

[pintoca]

i liked my last cat, till it got cat-napped by the ex, except for the part where it ruined all my blinds

Anybody notice the irony of a hamster having a pet cat??? what world are we living in???

 

[jenscats5]

LOL and btw these words of wisdom I think you will enjoy:

If you want someone who will bring you the paper without first tearing it apart to remove the sports section .. buy a dog.

If you want someone willing to make a fool of himself simply over the joy of seeing you ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never says its not quite as good as his mother made it ... buy a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ... buy a dog.

If you want someone to scare away burglars, without a lethal weapon which terrifies you and endangers the lives of your family and all the neighbors ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you and watch a romantic movie ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get up on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores ... buy a dog.

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually ... buy a dog.

But on the other hand, If you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night, only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness, Then, my friend . . .

Buy a cat.

(Any resemblance to a man is purely coincidental)

Awwww, that's cute.... I like dogs but they are too high maintenance -- too close to kids, which is why I don't have one....

My cats come when I call them, greet me when I come home, cuddle with me when I sleep, etc..... but they are just aloof enough that it's not too clingy....

 

[nikolai_bolkov]

my cats are hilarious

2 persians we adopted from foster home

they stick to my gf but eye me with suspision