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Silly question for guys...

Werd

Werd

New member
If you told a woman that you loved her and she told you she didn't know if she believed you, what would your reaction be?
 
Werd said:
If you told a woman that you loved her and she told you she didn't know if she believed you, what would your reaction be?
Click to expand...

Tighten the handcuffs?
 
LOL to the silly replies.

I know how I feel... but I doubt his sincerity and I flat out told him so. He flat out asked me, "Do you believe that I love you?" My answer flat out, "I dont know."

I had dinner last night with my old bf and I guess we shouldn't have ended up in bed. Something didnt go quite right (it was a really strange thing - has to do with trust. We all know that sex is best when you completely trust that other person. I know I love him, but I doubt if he truly loves me. I started choking, he didn't hear me tell him to stop and I freaked when I couldn't breathe for a second) and I started to cry. In the end, it was really late we had both been drinking and we just went to sleep.

This whole thing is just seeming surreal to me.

I mean I have been waiting MONTHS to see him again and now that I did see him, I am not sure if I am happy about it. You would think that I would have been comforted by him telling me he loved me, but I felt the exact opposite.
 
Werd said:
LOL to the silly replies.



I had dinner last night with my old bf and I guess we shouldn't have ended up in bed. Something didnt go quite right (it was a really strange thing - has to do with trust. We all know that sex is best when you completely trust that other person. I know I love him, but I doubt if he truly loves me. I started choking, he didn't hear me tell him to stop and I freaked when I couldn't breathe for a second) and I started to cry. In the end, it was really late we had both been drinking and we just went to sleep.
Click to expand...


didn't your mom teach you not to talk with your mouth full?
 
It was really weird. Wasnt any sort of autoerotic asphyxiation stuff. I wasn't supposed to end up choking.... but I did. The fact that we were both a bit hammered and it was late didn't help.

I guess I am thinking, is this one of those things that a guy would just pretend didn't happen and as a chick I am supposed to just let it go. Or is this one of those chick things that we will sweat a guy over till he gets annoyed because we are making something more out of a sitch than needs be made.
 
Damn woman!

What are you doing fucking the guy in the first place?

Now he's sure to respect you huh?

Fuck it, find someone else. Your hot and, up until your last post, clearly intelligent. Any guy would be lucky to have you for the most part (unless you're a psycho bitch from hell -which I doubt).

I mean if you doubt his love for you, are you ever really going to believe it? Do you want to spend the rest of, or a huge chunk of your life in a relationship like that?

Time to cross you legs for a year and figure out your priorities in life.

Or sleep with him until it blows up again...whatever

luck to you!
 
that happened to me once and my gut at the time said that it was her way of deflecting it- ie she didnt love me, and by saying she didnt believe I loved her, she had no "obligation" to return the proclamation.

my gut was right btw.
 
Werd said:
LOL to the silly replies.

I know how I feel... but I doubt his sincerity and I flat out told him so. He flat out asked me, "Do you believe that I love you?" My answer flat out, "I dont know."

I had dinner last night with my old bf and I guess we shouldn't have ended up in bed. Something didnt go quite right (it was a really strange thing - has to do with trust. We all know that sex is best when you completely trust that other person. I know I love him, but I doubt if he truly loves me. I started choking, he didn't hear me tell him to stop and I freaked when I couldn't breathe for a second) and I started to cry. In the end, it was really late we had both been drinking and we just went to sleep.

This whole thing is just seeming surreal to me.

I mean I have been waiting MONTHS to see him again and now that I did see him, I am not sure if I am happy about it. You would think that I would have been comforted by him telling me he loved me, but I felt the exact opposite.
Click to expand...

like i mentioned in my other post - strippers ALWAYS have issues
 
just doesn't sound like a healthy situation, can't communicate?
 
I agree, if you aren't sure you believe him, get the fuck out. without trust and respect, there is nothing. I found that one out the hard way.
 
Dear werd,

You cant see this post, but I am sticking my tongue out at you and waving my hands around with thumbs in ears,

Yours in sport
Jestros
 
Griz1 said:
Damn woman!

What are you doing fucking the guy in the first place?

Now he's sure to respect you huh?

Fuck it, find someone else. Your hot and, up until your last post, clearly intelligent. Any guy would be lucky to have you for the most part (unless you're a psycho bitch from hell -which I doubt).

I mean if you doubt his love for you, are you ever really going to believe it? Do you want to spend the rest of, or a huge chunk of your life in a relationship like that?

Time to cross you legs for a year and figure out your priorities in life.

Or sleep with him until it blows up again...whatever

luck to you!
Click to expand...

This is a man that I have known 4 years now. (you could not have known that). We had a casual relationship that got too serious too fast too close to the time that his late wife passed. We were madly in love - the only man my kids have ever spent time with that was not their father. Then all of the sudden - BAM - shit got screwed up because I returned a very expensive birthday present... lots of stuff surrounding that, but that is the Reader's Digest version.

He didnt MEAN to hurt me when we were in bed. It was accidental. The only reason he did not stop IMMEDIATELY was because he truly couldnt hear me (he is deaf in one ear). It was late and we had both been drinking.

The reason I doubt his love now is not due to what happened in bed, but because of how we broke up initially and the way stuff never really got talked about.

I have no experience with dating someone who has been widowed so I dont know if his behavior was due to the grieving process. I told him that I was very jealous of his late wife - and he really poopooed it because though he loved her in many ways he was never passionately in love with her. He married her knowing she would die and took care of her untill her demise. We needed this time apart. He needed to date others and I needed to as well, also needed time alone to be with my kids and get OUR world together.

or if his behavior is part of his personality. Meaning, that he feels passionately now... but then one day *poof* it is gone (He is diagnosed bipolar and takes his medication religiously.).

or if it was due to all the stresses in our separate lives... or something different.
 
geoboy said:
that happened to me once and my gut at the time said that it was her way of deflecting it- ie she didnt love me, and by saying she didnt believe I loved her, she had no "obligation" to return the proclamation.

my gut was right btw.
Click to expand...

I told him that I loved him very much, which I do.

After I started crying was when he asked me (to comfort me because he was saying he didn't MEAN to hurt me - which I KNOW he didn't mean to, but at that very second I was still freaked out. Choking is a scary feeling.), "Dont you know I love you?" And I couldn't lie... because honestly at this point, I am NOT sure, but that was not because of what happened in bed. It was because of all the other stuff I posted before.
 
TheOak01 said:
I would feel hurt but try and understand why I wasnt believed
Click to expand...

This is what I would feel.

It was late and we were both very tired so we didn't talk about it.
 
jestros said:
Dear werd,

You cant see this post, but I am sticking my tongue out at you and waving my hands around with thumbs in ears,

Yours in sport
Jestros
Click to expand...

Good think you have an Xbox to keep you amused. :qt:
 
How were you choking? I don't understand..:confused:

I would be alittle hurt, but get over it.
 
walk away. <-my advice to you
shrug, maybe slight dejection, if I meant it I would give it time, if I didn't mean it I'd be like, damn I need to learn to lie better.<-my answer to the original question.

Actually now that I think about it my outward reaction would be the same either way--just give it time, I will prove it to you, blah blah blah. think about it. what am I going to say if you say you don't believe me>? "Sike! Just kidding bro!"
 
She's probably insecure or.... the guy's done something for her to question his honesty. Ex: if the guy tells her this for the first time right when he's about to bone her....for the first time :lmao:


:o



:FRlol:


Then again, if they've been together for months before boning, it could be acceptable.
 
Werd said:
If you told a woman that you loved her and she told you she didn't know if she believed you, what would your reaction be?
Click to expand...
If I loved her, then I'd say that I was hurt that she didn't believe me.

If I didn't love her, then I'd say "and Alan Funt is coming around the corner".
 
Werd said:
If you told a woman that you loved her and she told you she didn't know if she believed you, what would your reaction be?
Click to expand...

my actions would speak louder than my words..I wouldnt get angry or upset...I would just smile that sly smile and say

"we'll see..."
 
thanks guys... I was thinking the same thing. "Actions WILL speak louder than words."

I'll just step back and see what's next...

Been under a lot of pressure lately, tend 2 b a bit emotional.
 
Werd said:
If you told a woman that you loved her and she told you she didn't know if she believed you, what would your reaction be?
Click to expand...
I would find someone to love that would believe me...!
 
Aerojaxx said:
I would find someone to love that would believe me...!
Click to expand...

Or perhaps you might work on SHOWING it a bit better?

Love isn't a word or a feelings....

Love is action.

This is why I doubt. He has behaved extremely lovingly in the past and I did grow to love him very deeply. Then his behavior said otherwise.

Frankly, I think I am more surprized at my reaction when I heard him tell me that he loved me. I haven't heard him say that in months. We've both been through a lot - together and individually. I would have thought it would have made me feel good to hear him say, but it didn't. I felt very unsettled.

I guess we need time. We both held back a lot last night (not talking about sex) and this morning. There was still a lot of loving behavior (doing kind little things unsolicited for the other) but still we held back as if to protect ourselves.
 
Werd said:
Or perhaps you might work on SHOWING it a bit better?

Love isn't a word or a feelings....

Love is action.

This is why I doubt. He has behaved extremely lovingly in the past and I did grow to love him very deeply. Then his behavior said otherwise.

Frankly, I think I am more surprized at my reaction when I heard him tell me that he loved me. I haven't heard him say that in months. We've both been through a lot - together and individually. I would have thought it would have made me feel good to hear him say, but it didn't. I felt very unsettled.

I guess we need time. We both held back a lot last night (not talking about sex) and this morning. There was still a lot of loving behavior (doing kind little things unsolicited for the other) but still we held back as if to protect ourselves.
Click to expand...
Exscrews me for breathing....!! I didn't sign up for the lesson on love...!! No, seriously I know that from his stand point...if he is telling you that "he loves you", regardless of the past.....BE HONEST and decisive...
 
Aerojaxx said:
Exscrews me for breathing....!! I didn't sign up for the lesson on love...!! No, seriously I know that from his stand point...if he is telling you that "he loves you", regardless of the past.....BE HONEST and decisive...
Click to expand...

I wasnt being snotty darlin'... ease up and give me a kiss :qt:
 
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