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nice guys finish last

G

georgie24

New member
im the sad reality of that true fact. i went from dating/sleeping with my girl to dropping and picking up her son from school and dropping and picking up her mom from work not only that but i take her to do laundry and shop too.. im such a stupid asshole i did this to myself. im filled with rage/shame/guilt. i dont know where else to turn guys/gals but i needed to get this off my chest. :bawling:
 
I think that is VERY nice!

Does she tell you often how much it means to her? I hope so!

I always have to make mental notes to tell my hubby Thank You for his kindness. Taking a loved one for granted is NOT good!
 
1. There's a difference between being nice and being manipulated.

2. Don't give gifts when you expect something back.

3. If you don't like the situation, stand up and change it.
 
Nice guys do finish last. Myself included, I'm there with ya bro!

We need to find women who can respect us as much as we respect them!'

my two cents
 
georgie24 said:
im a complete doormat for people to walk all over me. thats my job in life
Click to expand...


I take it this means "YES" to the ? I asked if she took you for granted?Shame on her and DOUBLE SHAME on YOU!

SPEAK UP and tell her how you're feeling( in a nice manner of course).
 
Shankerr said:
Nice guys do finish last. Myself included, I'm there with ya bro!

We need to find women who can respect us as much as we respect them!'

my two cents
Click to expand...

Gutless guys finish last, not nice guys. Give the girls something to respect and they will respect you.
 
Well man, it sounds like you need to do something to change your situation. Living like you are now has got to be hell on your test levels. Gool luck.
 
THeMaCHinE said:


Gutless guys finish last, not nice guys. Give the girls something to respect and they will respect you.
Click to expand...


Quote of the day. I wish everyone who posts these Nice Guy threads would read this!
 
THeMaCHinE said:


Gutless guys finish last, not nice guys. Give the girls something to respect and they will respect you.
Click to expand...


like what?? gimme an example bro?

should i kick the shit out of some dude in front of her?:D
 
Not really. Girls assume that because I am tall, muscular, take care of myself and drive a nice car that I am the stereotypical male scumbag, the type of guy that would say something like "Gutless guys finish last, not nice guys. Give the girls something to respect and they will respect you." I'm sure you know the type..... However, and I hate to say this, but my mom and dad raised me to respect women and treat them as such... I just think its too bad that some girls think they should be able to take advantage of that.. After a while, I do get sick of it and kick them to the corner, but I seem to find another one the same.. Just glad that I managed to find a really sweet, and very attractive girl now! too bad I had to move half way across the counrty to find her ;-)
 
Nice guys always finish first in the end Georgie, but you've got to have respect for yourself.

I thought it was over between you and her anyway.

To drag out a tireless cliche, it's not about whether you win or lose but how you play the game. You will get a few victories under your belt by being a complete asshole in life, but could you seriously live with yourself carrying on like that.

In my business we have a saying, 'winning a single deal is never worth ruining your integrity over, because once you've lost your integrity, you can never get it back'. There will always be new deals around the corner. It applies to any aspect of life as it does to business.
 
vinylgroover said:
Nice guys always finish first in the end Georgie, but you've got to have respect for yourself.

I thought it was over between you and her anyway.

To drag out a tireless cliche, it's not about whether you win or lose but how you play the game. You will get a few victories under your belt by being a complete asshole in life, but could you seriously live with yourself carrying on like that.

In my business we have a saying, 'winning a single deal is never worth ruining your integrity over, because once you've lost your integrity, you can never get it back'. There will always be new deals around the corner. It applies to any aspect of life as it does to business.
Click to expand...

good post.:)
 
Where is the part that your finishing last? If she doesn't appreciate you you have a problem, if your both happy there is no fucking problem :)
 
I did the nice guy routine forever and I always got dumped. So i got fed up with it and decided to take a stand. You can always do what I did. Become gay.
 
Jimsbbc said:



Quote of the day. I wish everyone who posts these Nice Guy threads would read this!
Click to expand...

Not true that quote.

I'm not gutless, yet I'm always nice and I have had to deal with
people who are constantly backstabbing me.

Yet, for some reason I can't fathom I never strike back.

Real friends are not exactly plentiful. Maybe 3-4 in your lifetime
if lucky.

I'm just sick and tired of having to watch my back with EVERYBODY.

I think it comes down to the way you're raised. I was raised to
show defference to women and be nice to people, but damn
some people are just not worth respecting.

Fonz
 
georgie24 said:



like what?? gimme an example bro?

should i kick the shit out of some dude in front of her?:D
Click to expand...

Where did you get "kick the shit out of some dude" from what I posted? Are you saying that it's impossible to be nice without being gutless? I disagree.

I try very much to be nice, but unfortunately, some people tend to take advantage of this -- and the natural inclination when you're a nice guy is to give more.

Set up reasonable boundaries, while still being nice, and you will earn respect. Sacrifice your beliefs and/or what you know is good for you and you are crossing the line into gutlessness.
 
Shankerr said:
I am the stereotypical male scumbag, the type of guy that would say something like "Gutless guys finish last, not nice guys. Give the girls something to respect and they will respect you." I'm sure you know the type.....
Click to expand...

Nice. Yeah, you're a nice guy.

We could have had a good conversation, instead, out of your own insecurities, you chose to internalize what I said and lash out at me in an attempt to "make me pay" for my viewpoint. Did I say you were gutless? No, I didn't -- I made a general statement, perhaps a bit off the cuff, based on my viewpoint. I didn't direct it towards your name, so why did you feel the need to attack me on a personal level by labeling me the "stereotypical male scumbag"? You don't know me, you don't know what I've been through, so don't be so judgemental, "nice guy".

P.S. Why is it difficult to grasp that you can have guts, still be nice and still treat women well? I'm baffled by this line of thinking.
 
Fonz said:


Not true that quote.

I'm not gutless, yet I'm always nice and I have had to deal with
people who are constantly backstabbing me.

Welcome to life, it's not just you -- and this has no bearing on whether you're nice or not. There will always be those out to take advantage of others.

Yet, for some reason I can't fathom I never strike back.

Well, that's rather nebulous. I bet if you really thought about it, you could figure out why. I guess on surface level I could ask how this is not being gutless, but I won't beacuse I believe that sometimes it's appropriate to strike back, sometimes it's not. As long as you feel good about your actions and yourself, you have made the right decision. If you don't "strike back" (your words) when you feel you should have, then that's when you erode your confidence and belief in yourself. As an aside, I don't believe striking back necessarily equates to violence or unseemly behavior, sometimes living well is the best revenge...

Real friends are not exactly plentiful. Maybe 3-4 in your lifetime
if lucky.

I agree. You'd be lucky to find that many.

I'm just sick and tired of having to watch my back with EVERYBODY.

Why do you feel like you have to do this? Focus on yourself and forget what others are thinking about you. Don't associate with people that you know aren't out for your best interests.

I think it comes down to the way you're raised. I was raised to
show defference to women and be nice to people, but damn
some people are just not worth respecting.

Same here. I also agree that there are people not worth respecting.
Click to expand...
 
supernav said:
People get confused sometimes on the wordings:

NICE GUY: Most people take "nice" guy to the extreme, that you wind up becoming a major pushover, mr i'll do anything for you, basically a wimp. Women LOVE drama in their life. Guys watch football, play instruments, drink beers with buddies...women love to sit on the phone and yak about their bf's all night with other women who also yak about their bf's. It's been like that since 1900's. A bf who is boring, and perfect just gets...well boring! There's no challenge.

BAD GUY: This is the misconception. You are not to be a nice guy, but also DON'T be a total jerk either. Both extremes are bad.

So what do you do? Be COOL. Be in the middle or more to the "bad' side (bad is good remember?). Be CONFIDENT IN YOURSELF, BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU VALUE IN LIFE. It's more about YOUR personality with yourself, then your relationship with others. If you are determined in your goals, don't take bullshit from others, voice your opinion and don't lie and talk crap and spew drama and meddle in it ... it works well with not only women, but others as well. Then u look "cool" and "that guy don't take no shit" type attitude.

Women admire that, and they'll feel so confident and protected around you. And one day when u show up with flowers they're like "awww, mr tough cool dude is being sensitive today..awww..". Shit like that. So don't be a wimp, don't be a jerk, just be a cool, confident James Dean personna who believes in himself and knows what he wants out of life.

-= nav =-
Click to expand...

Damn straight. This hits it right on the head. This is a quality post, man.
 
bet the farm that she is going to dump you eventually for a guy who likes to treat her like shit. BET THE FARM ON IT.

I wish you the best, and lots of luck. Sorry, it's the best I can do. Women are beyond me. Who knows what goes inside their minds.
 
"It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts." - Addison Walker -
 
Why do guys always say this? You cannot generalize women by the actions of a few or many. Sometimes, women will put up with being treated like crap. Not all will. Believe me, I have let myself be treated like crap more than once. It won't happen again.

PHATchik
 
Last edited:
Uh Oh said:
Why do guys always say this? You cannot generalize women by the actions of a few or many. Sometimes, women will put up with being treated like crap. Not all will. Believe me, I have let myself be treated like crap more than once. It won't happen again.

PHATchik
Click to expand...

Yes, but you don't want a spineless chump either, I'm sure. See, lots of spineless chumps (or sometimes poor bastards who are just clueless) think they are being nice guys. Well, they might be nice in some ways, but their chumpness overshadows this fact. Furthermore, "niceness" goes further if the person it's bestowed upon feels privileged to be a recipient of said "niceness". It's hard to feel that way when it's coming from a chump.
 
The only time I have ever said a guy is too nice is when he had no personality whatsoever. It was terrible. I'm a fairly sarcastic person. He couldn't comprehend the sarcasm. And ok, I'll give you a point for saying I don't want someone spineless either. But there is a difference between someone spineless and a too nice guy.
 
I know this much...I got a lot more out of girls when I was a major asshole this summer then I ever have being how I really am, but at the same time, I wouldn't consider even one of those girls to be a "good girl" the one Im kinda with now def is, I wouldn't date or go for good girls, Im not willing to turn one of em into one of the bitches with baggage all men love to hate, so I just went with te ones that did,,,liek I said though, it was a lot easier being the asshole as far as getting dates and everything else was concerned, its just not me though, left me feeling like an idiot and stupid and ashamed of myself

ohh well hopefully this right now works out
 
naturally anabolic said:
...i wont touch this subject.....could go on for pages.
Click to expand...

yea dude, u be nice, a lot of people just use you, run to you when they need someone to comfort em, but then toss ya aside when uve outgrown your purpose...I will never EVER be the fucking SHOULDER for soemone I like to cry on..and no if uchoose to distance yourself thinking Ill be here when u need me again, u can get fucked! lol Im not an asshole but I will protect myself from any more hurt from "friends"
 
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