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absolute hardgainer
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Definitions:
Cigarette : A pinch of tobaco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.
Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test . Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and woman gains her master.
Divorce : Future tense of marriage. College : A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present .
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece .
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ... Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage .
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
Smile:- A curve that can set a lot of things straight. Office:- A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn:- The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.:- A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee:- Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. Experience:- The" name" men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb:- An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher:- A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat:- A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. Opportunist:- A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist : A person who while falling from Eifel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Pessimist:- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,Instead of the first letter in word " OPPORTUNITY" .
Miser:- A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Father:- A banker provided by nature.
Criminal:- A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
Boss:- Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician:- One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Doctor :- A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
Software Engineer :- One who gets paid for reading such mails.....................
hardgainer (twisted)
Cigarette : A pinch of tobaco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.
Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test . Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and woman gains her master.
Divorce : Future tense of marriage. College : A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present .
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece .
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ... Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage .
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
Smile:- A curve that can set a lot of things straight. Office:- A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn:- The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.:- A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee:- Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. Experience:- The" name" men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb:- An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher:- A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat:- A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. Opportunist:- A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist : A person who while falling from Eifel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Pessimist:- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,Instead of the first letter in word " OPPORTUNITY" .
Miser:- A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Father:- A banker provided by nature.
Criminal:- A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
Boss:- Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician:- One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Doctor :- A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
Software Engineer :- One who gets paid for reading such mails.....................
hardgainer (twisted)
