Linebacker Faces Suspension For Genocide

[Lumberg]

MINNEAPOLIS—In the latest legal complication for an NFL player, Minnesota Vikings linebacker Antwone Evans may receive a fine and possibly even a suspension for his role in the mass slaughter of the Lithuanian people in a Sunday pogrom. "In cruelly rounding up and exterminating more than three million Lithuanian men, women, and children, Evans seriously violated the behavior standard to which we hold all our employees," said NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue. "We are currently deliberating on whether to suspend him pending the verdict of his U.N. tribunal."

 

[GinNJuice]

what?

 

[Ffactor]

WTF????

 

[Lumberg]

LMAO

 

[John G]

DId I..

Did I read that correctly?

 

[the nature boy]

obviously an onion article. Use deductive reasoning

1) no guy named Antwone Evans is from lithuiana
2) since when has genocide taken place in lithuiana, not in recent times.
3) If you examine the Vikings defense, it's highly doubtful that they even use linebackers.

 

[pauly]

obviously an onion article. Use deductive reasoning

3) If you examine the Vikings defense, it's highly doubtful that they even use linebackers.

bwhahahhaha!

 

[Fonz]

bwhahahhaha!

A bit O/T....but what on earth do you call that sexual postion in your Avatar?

"Ass-on-Face"........?

Fonz

 

[Lumberg]

obviously an onion article. Use deductive reasoning

1) no guy named Antwone Evans is from lithuiana
2) since when has genocide taken place in lithuiana, not in recent times.
3) If you examine the Vikings defense, it's highly doubtful that they even use linebackers.

Ladies and gentlemen, we not only have a very intelligent person here (probably saw my thread about Happy Scrappy but still very deductive) but an incredibly witty one was well. I must admit I am disappointed in you guys who thought there was even a shred of truth in that article.....but I guess thgat what I should've expected from a bunch of juiceheads!

JC

 

[pauly]

A bit O/T....but what on earth do you call that sexual postion in your Avatar?

"Ass-on-Face"........?

Fonz

"Juicy Pussy" or "Tounge in Twat" whatever the case, it's mighty delicious.

 

[Ffactor]

Who is onion and why would he write stupid articles like this

 

[runner]

3) If you examine the Vikings defense, it's highly doubtful that they even use linebackers.

oh...that was good!

 

[Lumberg]

Who is onion and why would he write stupid articles like this

LOL

www.onion.com

It's a fake news site written by a bunch of stoners.

 

[Bullit]

Ladies and gentlemen, we not only have a very intelligent person here (probably saw my thread about Happy Scrappy but still very deductive) but an incredibly witty one was well. I must admit I am disappointed in you guys who thought there was even a shred of truth in that article.....but I guess thgat what I should've expected from a bunch of juiceheads!

JC

I knew it must be from the Onion, or a copy cat site. I just didnt think it was all that funny.

 

[Fast Twitch Fiber]

Damn, I'm a Vikings fan and I still think that's hilarious. However, we do have a linebacker but he tries to be the quarterback.