Once, a small homeless man asked me for a cigarette. When I informed him that I don't smoke, he called me an asshole.
Myself, being a person who sees the good in all mankind, took this poor soul to the local soup kitchen where he proceeded to eat his first hot meal in weeks. As I sat there watching him with a gleam in my eye, I shoved his face into the bowl of scalding hot tomato soup that he was eating. I told him that if he couldn't take the heat, then the next logical step would be to get out of the soup kitchen. He agreed.
Sorry, just had to add a little kick to the thread.