Just caught my girlfriend cheating.....

[LiftHardOrDontLiftAtAll]

You won't believe this shit. So I come home from work after a long day at the office. When I drove home I noticed someones car in the driveway that I have never seen before. Well I sit in the car for a minute thinking what is going on. My girl has a history of cheating as I have caught her before. Well anyway I get out of the car and walk in the front door when I hear moaning and groaning. My grandma lives with us but she is upstairs and can't hear very well. I walk to our bedroom when I see my girl sandwiched between two guys. And it just wasn't any two guys. It was my best friend who is black, Alfonso, and my brother. I just stood there watching them both go to town on her. And boy was I pissed. She never let me do anal on her and here she is with Alfonso shoving his huge black dick up her ass. I was furious and I couldn't believe it. I stood there in the doorway for a good 5 min until they saw me. They quickly got off of her and just as Alfonso was pulling out his dick he shot me with the biggest wad of cum I have ever seen. The shit hit me in the fucking face. Now I was really pissed. I yelled out "what the fuck do you think you are doing!" and my brother said back "what does it look like? We are fuckin your woman." I couldn't hold back anymore. I jumped on Alfonso and began beating the shit out of him. My brother jumped on my back and now it was on. Here I was getting my ass kicked by two naked men. My girlfriend left the room. She had to take a piss. Well I grabbed Alfonso's dick by mistake when he shot me with another load of goo. This time in the mouth. I rammed Alfonso onto the bed jumped on top of him and started to strangle him. I hit my brother over the head with the book of Mormon and knocked him out. I nearly killed Alfonso until my neighbor, ex Navy Seal-wrestler, Mogali, pulled me off. Then Mogali started to beat up Alfonso. Well Somehow Alfonso escaped the cluthes of Mogali and ran out of the house naked into the street when he got run over by my grandma who was backing out her station wagon. Now Alfonso is in the hospital, my brother can't remember anything because of amnesia, my girfriend is about to get her ass kicked, and Mogali went home. What a fucked up day!

 

[TEXgrl]

i'll give this story a C-, low on creativity, not very believable at all. please drive thru and come again!

 

[HappyScrappy]

is this one of those star trek board dudes trying to be creative over here?
Or more of a triedia type?
I didn't bother reading this, but it sure doesn't have many line breaks.

 

[The Shadow]

BOS lives....

 

[HG Pennypacker]

This is funny on so many levels, I can't even go into it all.

"She never let me do anal on her and here she is with Alfonso shoving his huge black dick up her ass."


"I hit my brother over the head with the book of Mormon and knocked him out."

"ex Navy Seal-wrestler, Mogali"

 

[MFMan]

almost believed it until the was of cum in face line. other than that. nice try.

 

[Citruscide]

when paragraphs are large and blocky... I tend to space off and make up my own facts...

So, what I want to know is... when the police were questioning him, why didn't they ask about the gun?

C

 

[MFMan]

actually in its own deformed way, it is somewhat humorous.

 

[supersizeme]

no it's not a star trek geek because he registered back in june. that would be prior to the nerd bashing incident that happened last week.

interesting story...the part about the book of mormon made me laugh though. i can't believe alfonso would do something like that...he always seemed like a solid guy. your brother on the other hand, has been face fucking granny in the gums as well, so this shouldn't be a huge shock. i would get back together with the girlfriend and just try to put this whole drama behind you and get married.

 

[bigguns7]

The only thing remotely humorous was the Book of Mormon part.

 

[Hoopsdaddy135]

Did you swallow?

 

[TEXgrl]

no it's not a star trek geek because he registered back in june. that would be prior to the nerd bashing incident that happened last week.

interesting story...the part about the book of mormon made me laugh though. i can't believe alfonso would do something like that...he always seemed like a solid guy. your brother on the other hand, has been face fucking granny in the gums as well, so this shouldn't be a huge shock. i would get back together with the girlfriend and just try to put this whole drama behind you and get married.

now THIS gets an A for creativity!

 

[VicTusDeuS]

if it was your best friend and brother, why didnt you recognize the car in the driveway? And where are your parents? Are you from one of those ghetto families that lives with the grandother because the dad ran off before you were born and your mom is in prison?

 

[sermon_of_mockery]

the goo in the mouth thing was the give away

 

[Ffactor]

now THIS gets an A for creativity!

Sorry but that was some funny monkey shit!! I almost choked on my lunch!! Getting hit by come twice is just too damn funny. Are you AnalAssplorer??

 

[positive_failure]

Did you swallow?

well?

 

[Longhorn85]

the goo in the mouth thing was the give away

Yes, the artist's trademark.