Is this the month for divorce?

[EnderJE]

I already posted about some people I know that are getting divorced. Today, I found out that one of my good friends is planning to do it too. Married 20+ years. Just couldn't take it anymore. Wow.

 

[Lestat]

what couldn't he take anymore?

 

[EnderJE]

Just alot of bad shit over the past few years. Alot of bad shit.

 

[Lestat]

Just alot of bad shit over the past few years. Alot of bad shit.

examples?

 

[EnderJE]

examples?

nothing too specific...just imagine what it looks like when the love between two people has died...yet they stay together...

no closeness
no respect
always shouting
etc

 

[Lestat]

nothing too specific...just imagine what it looks like when the love between two people has died...yet they stay together...

no closeness
no respect
always shouting
etc

painful

 

[Longhorn85]

After 20 yrs if they want their freedom you would think they could strike a deal. Seperate beds, have a girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever.

Seems better to stay married for financial reasons if nothing else.

"Cheaper to keep her"

 

[feisty11975]

That is a long time to be married to someone to decide that they don't want to be together anymore. That really sucks

 

[EnderJE]

After 20 yrs if they want their freedom you would think they could strike a deal. Seperate beds, have a girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever.

Seems better to stay married for financial reasons if nothing else.

"Cheaper to keep her"

Financial reasons are what kept them together for this long. My friend just thought that enough was enough. Better to be poor and happy rather then rich and sad.

Feisty, yeah. It is a long time. But it just shows me that everything can die.

 

[Forge]

Financial reasons are what kept them together for this long. My friend just thought that enough was enough. Better to be poor and happy rather then rich and sad.

Feisty, yeah. It is a long time. But it just shows me that everything can die.

That's one thing my divorce taught me: no matter how in love you are, no matter how "perfect" it seems, no matter how many plans for the future you make together, nothing and I mean NOTHING is garaunteed. Things change, people change, sometimes too fast to accomodate them. And sometimes love can fail no matter how hard you try to make it work. So appreciate what you have today and enjoy it for all it's worth, because tomorrow it could be gone forever.

But of course, it could also last forever. You just can't know for certain...

 

[feisty11975]

Financial reasons are what kept them together for this long. My friend just thought that enough was enough. Better to be poor and happy rather then rich and sad.

Feisty, yeah. It is a long time. But it just shows me that everything can die.

Only if you let it!!!

 

[Longhorn85]

Only if you let it!!!

I hate that it ever gets to the point where you have to work to stay together.

Something you like/love should come naturally. Unfortunately as people we all have flaws and develop more flaws with time.

In a marriage you have to accept that other person for the long haul, warts and all. A lot of people are not willing to do that, especially in a culture that accepts divorce so readily.

 

[StickFigure]

I hate that it ever gets to the point where you have to work to stay together.

Something you like/love should come naturally. Unfortunately as people we all have flaws and develop more flaws with time.

In a marriage you have to accept that other person for the long haul, warts and all. A lot of people are not willing to do that, especially in a culture that accepts divorce so readily.

ALL relationships require work. Love comes naturally but keeping that love alive and thriving takes work, no way around it. It's just like your kids, you love them no matter what and they love you, but you have to work to keep the relationship healthy and strong. Those that are unwilling to do that in either scenario are doomed for failure.

 

[Longhorn85]

ALL relationships require work.

I would say eventually, yes but not at first. If I was in a relationship less than two-three years old and it felt like work I wouldn't marry that person.

 

[EnderJE]

sorry for the downer thread folks...just a bad mood today...

tru about the relationship...i remember when I was thinking or was almost single again after 7 years...

 

[feisty11975]

I was married for 11 years and we never really had a good relationship. I was very young when I got married. If I could do it all again, I would never EVER have gotten married at 18 years old. I do not regret anything becuase I have the 3 most wonderful angels on this earth...

Personally, I finally know what I want in life and I am 30 years old. Damn it took me long enough

 

[Longhorn85]

Personally, I finally know what I want in life and I am 30 years old. Damn it took me long enough

30 yrs old is very young! You have a lot of years to look forward to!

 

[wootoom]

dude all u talk about is bad happenings in a family.

 

[StickFigure]

dude all u talk about is bad happenings in a family.

good call on choosing mini-woot over the vette bro.