I have cat like reflexes

[jerseyart]

Further evidence of my superiority.

It's early saturday morning, and I'm at my sis house to help my bro in law move some appliances from the kitchen to the basement, and basement to the kitchen (switching things around) Im already dying from only having gobne to ebd 4:30 am the night before.

Everything is going fine, and already moved the friedges and one stove, along with a dishwasher. The last thing is an older stove they want downstairs. So we slide it to the top of the basement stairs, and are trying to get it posiutioned right to fit through the doorway and tip it. Its tight, and the stove is a little stuck. So all of a sudden the weight just pops it loose and the bitch slams me straight in the legs, like a linebacker making a tackle. Lifted me right off the steps and in the air. And unlike the more modern appliances, this thing was heavy.

My whole life is flashing before my eyes (actually I only got as far as this redhead in the backseat of my car back in highschool......I wonder what ever happened to her)

Anyway instead of falling straight and having this thing crash into me at the bottom of the staircase (that would have really hurt). I landed on my feet onyl four steps down, and with superhuman strength that can only be the product of superior genetics, managed to halt the slide of the stove. Barely a twisted ankle being the only injury.

Feel free to marvel at the miracle that is Jerseyart

 

[CFZB]

lol

 

[GoldenDelicious]

...because youre a pussy

 

[jerseyart]

Golden

That's taking the "you are what you eat" wisdom a little far bor

After all, I don't call you a dick

 

[GoldenDelicious]

Golden

That's taking the "you are what you eat" wisdom a little far bor

After all, I don't call you a dick

of course you dont; your pussiness doesnt affect your perception, which would have to be severely skewed for you to call me a dick

you can call me turkish delight though except that im not turkish

 

[Buddy_Christ]

Further evidence of my superiority.

It's early saturday morning, and I'm at my sis house to help my bro in law move some appliances from the kitchen to the basement, and basement to the kitchen (switching things around) Im already dying from only having gobne to ebd 4:30 am the night before.

Everything is going fine, and already moved the friedges and one stove, along with a dishwasher. The last thing is an older stove they want downstairs. So we slide it to the top of the basement stairs, and are trying to get it posiutioned right to fit through the doorway and tip it. Its tight, and the stove is a little stuck. So all of a sudden the weight just pops it loose and the bitch slams me straight in the legs, like a linebacker making a tackle. Lifted me right off the steps and in the air. And unlike the more modern appliances, this thing was heavy.

My whole life is flashing before my eyes (actually I only got as far as this redhead in the backseat of my car back in highschool......I wonder what ever happened to her)

Anyway instead of falling straight and having this thing crash into me at the bottom of the staircase (that would have really hurt). I landed on my feet onyl four steps down, and with superhuman strength that can only be the product of superior genetics, managed to halt the slide of the stove. Barely a twisted ankle being the only injury.

Feel free to marvel at the miracle that is Jerseyart

Translation -


My sister and her husband asked me to come over and watch their kids while they moved some appliances.

Everything was going fine because I was staying out of the way like i had been told to. all of the sudden i had to throw my 2 cents into the situation. i got in the way, caused my brother-in-law to lose his grip and the stove he was trying to position to move down the stairs slips and begins to fall towards me.

my whole life was flashing before my eyes as this stove came flying towards me (actually, i only got so far as the homosexual experiences in the boys locker room in high school, damn do i miss those days...at the beginning of the season, the football team would call me their "After-hours Tight End" and by the end of the season, i was their "Used and Abused Wide Reciever )

the stove barely hit me in the shins, but the pain was instant. i screamed like a little bitch and jumped off the stairs, landing like a retard that just tripped over his 2 oversized feet, and barely twisted my ankle in the process. i spent the rest of the day with my foot elevated with an ice pack placed on it, crying like a little girl.

 

[jerseyart]

son of a bitch

Yeah thats her side of the story, but she has always been jeaous because my parents love me more

 

[Buddy_Christ]

son of a bitch

Yeah thats her side of the story, but she has always been jeaous because my parents love me more

at least some people around here still know how to take a joke

 

[Tink!]

holey shit..the two (crak & JA) of you make me giggle!!!!!!! i watching the two of you go back and forth! LOL

 

[Buddy_Christ]

holey shit..the two (crak & JA) of you make me giggle!!!!!!! i watching the two of you go back and forth! LOL

i didn't know anyone was ever watching JerseyArt and I have sex. JerseyArt, how come you told me those noises from the closet were coming from the other room? you should've just told me that people wanted to watch us make wild jungle love. i wouldnt' of complained.

 

[Beachbum1546]

i had some cat like reflexes in my physics class a few years back.

all the students, including myself, were in the classroom sitting in our desks. then the teacher walks in the door and throws a tennis ball right over our heads (about max arm reach height, he was doing a demo on acceleration and gravity).
so the ball is flying past everyone's head and i just reached up and caught it with one hand and threw back to him.
it was fucking awesome, everyone was so surprised. they said i was spiderman (movie had just some out).

 

[Testosterone boy]

Re: I have a chipmunks penis

Seriously

Every ho tells me so.

dunno

 

[DIVISION]

...Soon as I openfire, Jersey dies w/ open eyes........




DIV