Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below 
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
I killed a baby today and it
Doesn't matter much to me
As long as it's dead
Doesn't matter much to me
As long as it's dead
I got something to say
- Thread starter §äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
- Start date
satanic goatslayer
New member
I raped a small chicken today
As well, it doesn't matter much to me
As well, it doesn't matter much to me
THeMaCHinE
New member
killer tune; garage days was probably one of their best. They suck big balls now and have since and justice.
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
garage days ass
im talking about the misfits
im talking about the misfits
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
I raped your mother today and it
Doesn't matter much to me
As long as she spread
Doesn't matter much to me
As long as she spread
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
Sweet Death.
So are you a piece of shit?
So are you a piece of shit?
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
I wouldn't say you are a piece of shit. Many things you are, but piece of shit wouldn't be included in my list.
When were you diagnosed bipolar? (i dont really want to read ur site again, i dont need to know that much about ANYBODY) I'm just curious. don't answer if you don't want to.
When were you diagnosed bipolar? (i dont really want to read ur site again, i dont need to know that much about ANYBODY) I'm just curious. don't answer if you don't want to.
oh you can ask anything...i can simply not answer if it's not ok to... 
thx for saying you didn't think i was a piece of shit btw...
yeah my site is too big probably to quickly find facts like you asked.
first episode began late May-ish (or began to be obviousest then), diagnosed June 11, 1996, i was almost 32.
runs in the family though
was ok for a while after i recovered, not on meds (by doctor permission)
again i went to the doc Dec 6, 2000 (having been checking in with him during last fall...); was diagnosed with temporal lobe epilepsy also that time.
now am on Neurontin.
for both.
trying to get my records to my current psych (changed early this year) but so far no success
i'm on monthly check ins and have a counselor too...
ho hum.
love
helen
thx for saying you didn't think i was a piece of shit btw...
yeah my site is too big probably to quickly find facts like you asked.
first episode began late May-ish (or began to be obviousest then), diagnosed June 11, 1996, i was almost 32.
runs in the family though
was ok for a while after i recovered, not on meds (by doctor permission)
again i went to the doc Dec 6, 2000 (having been checking in with him during last fall...); was diagnosed with temporal lobe epilepsy also that time.
now am on Neurontin.
for both.
trying to get my records to my current psych (changed early this year) but so far no success
i'm on monthly check ins and have a counselor too...
ho hum.
love
helen
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
thats shitty about you not being able to get your records man, you may want to consider a lawsuit at this point if it affecting your health decisions.
do you have more mania or depression? i dont know a manic (that i know of) and this has always made me.. uhh. curious.. i guess i am asking about your episodes that were first "obvious"
did you just findyou couldnt control some things anymore ?
do you have more mania or depression? i dont know a manic (that i know of) and this has always made me.. uhh. curious.. i guess i am asking about your episodes that were first "obvious"
did you just findyou couldnt control some things anymore ?
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
haha,
i hate hte fact that metallica redid these thoough
:\
i hate hte fact that metallica redid these thoough
:\
dread_lady said:
Last time I thought for a whole morning my son was Jesus come around again...
My husband noticed eventually ;-). Called my Mom in the middle of the night, she said i was manic, take me to the ER.
This time - I thought people were switching bodies...*grin*
And other stuff.
Kinda kewl in a way
I've never been suicidal but i think my moods are...extreme
So, yeah, it was 'obvious'.
I got the number to find out how to file a complaint with the state who licensed him. I just have to wait until they are in - the people i need to talk to. Got that today...so that's hopeful
I'm very persistent and i will get those records somehow...
love
helen
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
HelenSL said:
Last time I thought for a whole morning my son was Jesus come around again...
My husband noticed eventually ;-). Called my Mom in the middle of the night, she said i was manic, take me to the ER.
This time - I thought people were switching bodies...*grin*
And other stuff.
Kinda kewl in a way
I've never been suicidal but i think my moods are...extreme
So, yeah, it was 'obvious'.
I got the number to find out how to file a complaint with the state who licensed him. I just have to wait until they are in - the people i need to talk to. Got that today...so that's hopeful
I'm very persistent and i will get those records somehow...
love
helen
wow, thats cool. i wish you luck and all, but sometimes i wish i was dillusional or something, life would be much better that way most of the time.
so was it "fun", or could you tell anything was wrong with yourself at that time? were you totally convinced your son was jesus? at the time./...
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
needleboy said:
thx for the suggestoin, i dont have that mp3, so im going to d/l
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
needleboy said:
well i shouds have a megadeth and In flames post on this first page somewhere, that gives u an idea of what i like
heavy metal (not trashy metal), stuff with fairly clean by heavy guitar work, not tooooo picky
also dabble with trance/techno/whatever and some in-between industrial stuff
john937
New member
Dread_lady,dread_lady said:
You're listening to music about killing babies,
and you wonder why you aren't more optimistic?
Everything you let into your consciousness influences you.
Your experiences are about the only thing you can't change or shed.
Fill your experiences with death lyrics,horror movies, negative people
and that's what your mind will be mulling over 24X7.
with the greatest of respect for your right to believe whatever you believe.....
consider the posibility that the people/places you hang with (like the site where you got that avatar)
are bringing negative influences into your life.
Dread- ever listen to the Cro-Mags??- Old School
Other Bands to check out:
Nitzer Ebb-Industrial Goth
Bad Brains- Hard Core
Big Black- Industrial Goth
LAT- No not a Johnny Cash cover. Lyrics are- " I walk the line between good and evil. My business is a little cloak and dagger. I drink so much I don't walk- I merely stagger."
Other Bands to check out:
Nitzer Ebb-Industrial Goth
Bad Brains- Hard Core
Big Black- Industrial Goth
LAT- No not a Johnny Cash cover. Lyrics are- " I walk the line between good and evil. My business is a little cloak and dagger. I drink so much I don't walk- I merely stagger."
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
john937 said:
OKIE DOKIEIEIEIE!!
i know all this,
I am quite happy right now, moreso than I ever have been I think, so i must be doing something right
Perhaps for you this is a bad example, but when I worried the most about positive things and religion and such, i was going through the most mental anguish
thanks for your concern, but i have my head on straight enough to be fine for now. these things i speak of are definitely a large part of who i am and that will not change for anyone, no matter how hard i try, and believe me i have tried.
but ultimatly, this is me at my best, my happiest, so i guess i am the exception.
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
Needleboy
Thanks, I looooooove Ministry. That was some of the first industrial that got me started i think. then followed thrill kill kult, skinny puppy, tons others
i dont really like goth metal or goth anything for my music, too slow. i prefer hard beats most of the time.
thx for suggestions.
Thanks, I looooooove Ministry. That was some of the first industrial that got me started i think. then followed thrill kill kult, skinny puppy, tons others
i dont really like goth metal or goth anything for my music, too slow. i prefer hard beats most of the time.
thx for suggestions.
dread_lady said:
oh i believed it, sure...yeah it's super-kewl
i bet it's like being on rec drugs (when they work well
)...from what i can gather.weird weird stuff.
people kill themselves when they realize it's not true after all.
but until that happens...*grin* - i mean, you kind of think you're gonna change the world...
it's funny what people said to me last fall
one said "who do you think you are - the savior of this Bible study?"
i kinda smiled inside...knowing what DSM-IV says about the symptoms...grandiosity...but then i cried my eyes out later, when they told me to leave the Bible study...(as of now i am still banned until at least 9/2002 (!) although i discovered the one in the next town doesn't care and let me join theirs immediately. Go figure
makes about as much sense as many other things about the Church...so someone else said "who do you think you are? a prophet???"
it would have stayed funny if they had no power over my life but...well they did...either them or their friends.
oh well. such is life. when you're at the bottom then you cain't go down no more and you can look for the think to pull out that makes the whole house fall down.
heh heh
they will never get the better of me...
so one of the most offensive ideas i had was - Jesus was Bipolar LOL
i mean, everyone who has it seriously thinks they are God - LOL - i wonder why no-one else thought of that...and he didn't sleep...he had all the symptoms!!!
<AHEM>
think i'd better go hide now...or at least make dinner
but, oh yeah, the whole point is that you DO believe it. some stuff you believe is not good though. in the end reality is...less terrifying than a mind free to roam...some of you might understand...your mind has been there thru drugs, dreams, illness, somehow...your mind has been to hell and you know that nothing worse than where you've already been can ever lie ahead...it takes a lot of the fear away...it's quite life-transforming...
then you realize how scared everyone else is...
oh but i never said that
love
helen
THeMaCHinE
New member
needleboy said:
Wow. Somebody else who knows who Big Black is. Cool. Listened to Kerosene this morning. Not sure I'd call them goth though.
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
HelenSL said:
oh i believed it, sure...yeah it's super-kewl
i bet it's like being on rec drugs (when they work well
weird weird stuff.
people kill themselves when they realize it's not true after all.
but until that happens...*grin* - i mean, you kind of think you're gonna change the world...
it's funny what people said to me last fall
one said "who do you think you are - the savior of this Bible study?"
i kinda smiled inside...knowing what DSM-IV says about the symptoms...grandiosity...but then i cried my eyes out later, when they told me to leave the Bible study...(as of now i am still banned until at least 9/2002 (!) although i discovered the one in the next town doesn't care and let me join theirs immediately. Go figure
so someone else said "who do you think you are? a prophet???"
it would have stayed funny if they had no power over my life but...well they did...either them or their friends.
oh well. such is life. when you're at the bottom then you cain't go down no more and you can look for the think to pull out that makes the whole house fall down.
heh heh
they will never get the better of me...
so one of the most offensive ideas i had was - Jesus was Bipolar LOL
i mean, everyone who has it seriously thinks they are God - LOL - i wonder why no-one else thought of that...and he didn't sleep...he had all the symptoms!!!
<AHEM>
think i'd better go hide now...or at least make dinner
but, oh yeah, the whole point is that you DO believe it. some stuff you believe is not good though. in the end reality is...less terrifying than a mind free to roam...some of you might understand...your mind has been there thru drugs, dreams, illness, somehow...your mind has been to hell and you know that nothing worse than where you've already been can ever lie ahead...it takes a lot of the fear away...it's quite life-transforming...
then you realize how scared everyone else is...
oh but i never said that
love
helen
It is unfortunate that your church, which in my opinoin is there to HELP people, in fact turned yoiu away when you probably needed their support the most.
I wish you luck with future treatment, etc. Thank you for giving me a little insight on what you are dealing with.
MrMuscle
New member
yeah lard ass it was a song.just like this one
I was born on the cemetery
Under the sign of the moon
Raised from my grave by the dead
And I was made a mercenary
In the legions of Hell
Now I'm king of pain, I'm insane
You know my only pleasure
Is to hear you cry
I'd love to hear you cry
I'd love to see you die
And I'll be the first
To watch your funeral
And I'll be the last to leave
I'd love to hear you cry
And when you're down beyond the ground
I'll dig up your body again
And make love to shame
Oh lady cry, and say goodbye
Oh lady cry, and say goodbye
You've gotta say goodbye
'Cause I will eat your mind
I was born on the cemetery
Under the sign of the moon
Raised from my grave by the dead
And I was made a mercenary
In the legions of Hell
Now I'm king of pain, I'm insane
You know my only pleasure
Is to hear you cry
I'd love to hear you cry
I'd love to see you die
And I'll be the first
To watch your funeral
And I'll be the last to leave
I'd love to hear you cry
And when you're down beyond the ground
I'll dig up your body again
And make love to shame
Oh lady cry, and say goodbye
Oh lady cry, and say goodbye
You've gotta say goodbye
'Cause I will eat your mind
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
HelenSL said:dread_lady
Was the little poem you began this thread with, a quote? A song lyric?
Did you really 'kill' something yesterday? Or were you being a bit metaphorical?
No offense...just wondring
love
helen
It is a song by the Misfits.. I havent killed anything today.. yet
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
hey Jim
how's life in Nac?
how's life in Nac?
Jimsbbc
New member
Nac is a whole lot of fun!!! I like it here. The fall semester is a zoo compared to summer2. I joined SuperGym on Main so I can actually get in a work out. There are some big guys there. I can't work out at the Wellness Center anymore bc there are just too many damn people in there. Oh, yeah, the parties kick ass. I met this girl in my math class... 
The fall semester is a zoo compared to summer2. I joined SuperGym on Main so I can actually get in a work out. There are some big guys there. I can't work out at the Wellness Center anymore bc there are just too many damn people in there. Oh, yeah, the parties kick ass. I met this girl in my math class...
§äñît¥ Pôí§ðñ
New member
needleboy - i was going to post that yesterday but its too repetitive for me to type out (lazy) heheeh
Jim - thats a decent gym, at least for Nac. the rest suck ass. theres one on univ. somewhere i think, but its not very well air conditioned and the equip sucks.. so thats your best bet at super gym
Fall is usually the best at SFA, after xmas and when they get their grades they are ussually depressed and shit for spring, lol
but there are some cool xmas parties to look forawrd to
Jim - thats a decent gym, at least for Nac. the rest suck ass. theres one on univ. somewhere i think, but its not very well air conditioned and the equip sucks.. so thats your best bet at super gym
Fall is usually the best at SFA, after xmas and when they get their grades they are ussually depressed and shit for spring, lol
but there are some cool xmas parties to look forawrd to
needleboy
there's always Bohemian Rhapsody, such a popular song...i know the words...
Mama I just killed a man
put a gun against his head
pulled the trigger now he's dead
etc...
continues with
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me....
ending with
nothing really matters
anyone can see
nothing really matters
nothing really matters...to me...
anyway the wind blows....
chilling (i think)
love
helen
there's always Bohemian Rhapsody, such a popular song...i know the words...
Mama I just killed a man
put a gun against his head
pulled the trigger now he's dead
etc...
continues with
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me....
ending with
nothing really matters
anyone can see
nothing really matters
nothing really matters...to me...
anyway the wind blows....
chilling (i think)
love
helen
