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smallmovesal
New member
To whom it may concern,
I would like to take off all of my clothes and get paid for it by Chippendales.
I never wear a shirt around my house and I can take off my clothes really fast. I timed myself and I can get out of my pajamas in just twelve seconds. I know that speed is not necessarily the main talent you like to see in your dancers, but I just wanted you to know that I could take off my clothes really fast if you needed me to. I'll take off all of my clothes anytime you guys want. Like, if we were just standing around, and you looked at me and you said, "Hey, take off your clothes," I would. No problem. Whatever you say.
I know a lot of different dances and although I haven't done most of them with no clothes on, I think I would still remember them naked. I know the Twist, the Swim, the Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, just to name a few.
I have worked up an act to the tune of the Village People's "Macho Man" which I think would bring the house down, especially once my pants are off. We would turn off all the lights in the place, except for a lava lamp center stage. I would then burst out of a large strawberry pie wearing only a feathered headband, sandals, and a pair of leather chaps. I would then break into "Macho Man" at the top of my lungs but I would change all the words to stuff about me taking off my leather chaps. For instance, instead of singing "I've got to be a Macho Man," I would sing something like, "I've got to take my leather chaps off," or something like that. I would then hurl my constrictive chaps into the audience. For my grand finale, I would wrap a cobra around my loin area and do one-handed push-ups for the crowd.
What do you think? If required, I will also sex it up with everyone in the audience. I don't care. I'm very free and I don't much care if I have to have sex with hundreds of people in order to get my name in lights. My size may be an issue, but one I will work hard to overcome. I'm currently five foot seven, and around 215. I guess you could say that I could stand to lose a few, but I figure I will sweat most of it off during my hot dance routines under the blazing lights. To help your hiring committee get past my physical limitations, I am willing to come to your office and have sex with all of them, and everyone else there. Let me know.
If I sound like the kind of person you would like to see with his pants off, please contact me at your earliest convenience.
Thanks a lot,
cornholio
I would like to take off all of my clothes and get paid for it by Chippendales.
I never wear a shirt around my house and I can take off my clothes really fast. I timed myself and I can get out of my pajamas in just twelve seconds. I know that speed is not necessarily the main talent you like to see in your dancers, but I just wanted you to know that I could take off my clothes really fast if you needed me to. I'll take off all of my clothes anytime you guys want. Like, if we were just standing around, and you looked at me and you said, "Hey, take off your clothes," I would. No problem. Whatever you say.
I know a lot of different dances and although I haven't done most of them with no clothes on, I think I would still remember them naked. I know the Twist, the Swim, the Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, just to name a few.
I have worked up an act to the tune of the Village People's "Macho Man" which I think would bring the house down, especially once my pants are off. We would turn off all the lights in the place, except for a lava lamp center stage. I would then burst out of a large strawberry pie wearing only a feathered headband, sandals, and a pair of leather chaps. I would then break into "Macho Man" at the top of my lungs but I would change all the words to stuff about me taking off my leather chaps. For instance, instead of singing "I've got to be a Macho Man," I would sing something like, "I've got to take my leather chaps off," or something like that. I would then hurl my constrictive chaps into the audience. For my grand finale, I would wrap a cobra around my loin area and do one-handed push-ups for the crowd.
What do you think? If required, I will also sex it up with everyone in the audience. I don't care. I'm very free and I don't much care if I have to have sex with hundreds of people in order to get my name in lights. My size may be an issue, but one I will work hard to overcome. I'm currently five foot seven, and around 215. I guess you could say that I could stand to lose a few, but I figure I will sweat most of it off during my hot dance routines under the blazing lights. To help your hiring committee get past my physical limitations, I am willing to come to your office and have sex with all of them, and everyone else there. Let me know.
If I sound like the kind of person you would like to see with his pants off, please contact me at your earliest convenience.
Thanks a lot,
cornholio
