got caught on the toilet...

[AAP]

damn. Was in there having a nice leisurely little poop... (ok, big one), totally forgot about having a custom made shelf to go below my plasma delivered today.

Knock on the door and I ignore it... then a phone call, I ignore that too. Finally a buzz from the gate saying they tried to deliver it and I wasn't home.

I swear, time froze like in the slo-mo time in Matrix as I went into a frenzy of pulling up my pants... by the time I ran out of the house, the toilet paper roll was still spinning.

But, I got my shit. (so to speak)

 

[gab9681]

I feel your pain. At work, my boss always seems to wait to call me when I am taking a dump. And then he gets all pissy if I don't answer my phone. I hate my boss though, so now I answer my phone and continue my business while talking to him. That pisses him off even more. It makes me mad though, because I like to nice a nice relaxing dump, and talking to you boss really throws that off.

 

[Moderate_THIS]

You could have made this into the question of the day!

 

[rnch]

i had one control freak supervisor who actually timed the employees's bathroom breaks. swearin' to god!!! a couple of times i had false alamrs, came out the door to find him standing there staring at the clock.

after that, i started taking reading material with me, just to piss the fucker off.

 

[theoak01]

I worked at a place where I put in 8hr shifts with 15minutes of "personal time" with all the water I drank and atleast 2 shits I went over by 10mins ed

 

[PinkPanther]

I feel your pain. At work, my boss always seems to wait to call me when I am taking a dump. And then he gets all pissy if I don't answer my phone. I hate my boss though, so now I answer my phone and continue my business while talking to him. That pisses him off even more. It makes me mad though, because I like to nice a nice relaxing dump, and talking to you boss really throws that off.

So, how does your boss know what you are up to??

 

[Wynn]

I don't think I've ever had a "leisurely" poop. I've had tired, violent, rushed, watery, smelly, and even relaxing poops but never one like that. Do you use any pharmaceutical aids to have one like that?

 

[hardrock]

I hate it when I forget to bring the cordless phone in the can with me. Phone rings and I'm doin the 20 yard dash to my room with pants around my ankles.

 

[sermon_of_mockery]

one time my poop was soo long that when he finally broke,his tail swiped at a questionable angle,and in the end left a skid on my balls sack.

 

[Deus Ex Machina]

So, how does your boss know what you are up to??

cameras... you may not know it, but cameras were installed in every workplace across america for security purposes.

where have you been?

 

[sh4dowf4lcon]

:aap: smiley = shit taker

 

[Buddy_Christ]

dunno why some people get so worried about the phone ringing when they are on the throne. that's what answering machines, caller ID, and voice mail were invented for.

i mean, damn, it's not like the person calling knows you ate mexican the night before and now you're regretting it.

at least you got, uhh, gave, err, whatever, your shit AAP.

 

[pitbullstl]

one time my poop was soo long that when he finally broke,his tail swiped at a questionable angle,and in the end left a skid on my balls sack.

And then..........????

 

[Moderate_THIS]

Nothing's more satisfying than dropping a three-coiler

 

[MFMan]

Nothing worse than taking a shit and not having toilet paper.