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dear homeless people,
it is with deep regret that i write to inform you that the national bank of me, is not only closed, but it has never been open for business.
we have always not-appreciated your knocking on our car window to politely inquire if we have any, "motherfucking, cocksucking change" or your gracing us with the many, plentiful opportunities of watching you masturbate in public as we, here at the national bank of me, ate our lunch.
we sincerely not-enjoyed the countless times of having the opportunity to smell the aroma of strawberry-kiwi MD 20/20 infused with the advanced stages of periodontal disease, despite being 15 paces from you in a wind storm.
though our already-closed doors are unfortunately closing, we will always reflect on the drunken, profanity-laden, paranoia-filled speeches, the moving of Coca-Cola cups, overflowing with piss, from the outdoor cafe tables, and the non-stop barrage of bad stories, incoherent ramblings, and the non-sensical insults you so tactfully hurled at us.
ee would like to not-wish you continued success in your pursuit of booze, unwanted sexual advances, and cheap drugs.
sincerely,
will-never-give-you-a-fucking-red-cent because-i-do-not-sympathize
ceo, national bank of me
it is with deep regret that i write to inform you that the national bank of me, is not only closed, but it has never been open for business.
we have always not-appreciated your knocking on our car window to politely inquire if we have any, "motherfucking, cocksucking change" or your gracing us with the many, plentiful opportunities of watching you masturbate in public as we, here at the national bank of me, ate our lunch.
we sincerely not-enjoyed the countless times of having the opportunity to smell the aroma of strawberry-kiwi MD 20/20 infused with the advanced stages of periodontal disease, despite being 15 paces from you in a wind storm.
though our already-closed doors are unfortunately closing, we will always reflect on the drunken, profanity-laden, paranoia-filled speeches, the moving of Coca-Cola cups, overflowing with piss, from the outdoor cafe tables, and the non-stop barrage of bad stories, incoherent ramblings, and the non-sensical insults you so tactfully hurled at us.
ee would like to not-wish you continued success in your pursuit of booze, unwanted sexual advances, and cheap drugs.
sincerely,
will-never-give-you-a-fucking-red-cent because-i-do-not-sympathize
ceo, national bank of me
