being italian

[Carmen]

is not coming naturally to me (cause i'm not italian)...
i tried to make fresh pasta today. this morning i went out and bought a pasta machine- to roll it out into flat strips or cut into spaghetti shape.
the recipe said to use 2 1/2 cups of flour and make a mound of it with a hole in the center, then pour 3 beaten eggs into the well and gradually stir in the flour from the mound.

So with my kids watching, i pour the egg in and it immediately finds the lowest portion of the flour wall holding it in, and pours right out, which in this case, was right to the edge of the counter and out onto my pants and feet.

ok, they are cracking up. I clean it all up, change my clothes, and start over.

this time, i do it in a bowl and its going ok. i'm kneading the dough, which is sticky as hell, when i don't know what the hell happened but it kinda flew out of my hands, splats onto the floor, and my puppy snatched it fast as lightening and ran off with it.

*sigh*

i clean it all up, get her outside, get my kids to stop laughing, and started over.

i now have the smallest lump of dough resting... i can't believe this is gonna feed the three of us.

 

[Dial_tone]

lol, reminds me of the Dan Akroyd Julia Child skit where he/she cuts her finger and it starts bleeding all over the place.

 

[jenscats5]

is not coming naturally to me (cause i'm not italian)...
i tried to make fresh pasta today. this morning i went out and bought a pasta machine- to roll it out into flat strips or cut into spaghetti shape.
the recipe said to use 2 1/2 cups of flour and make a mound of it with a hole in the center, then pour 3 beaten eggs into the well and gradually stir in the flour from the mound.

So with my kids watching, i pour the egg in and it immediately finds the lowest portion of the flour wall holding it in, and pours right out, which in this case, was right to the edge of the counter and out onto my pants and feet.

ok, they are cracking up. I clean it all up, change my clothes, and start over.

this time, i do it in a bowl and its going ok. i'm kneading the dough, which is sticky as hell, when i don't know what the hell happened but it kinda flew out of my hands, splats onto the floor, and my puppy snatched it fast as lightening and ran off with it.

*sigh*

i clean it all up, get her outside, get my kids to stop laughing, and started over.

i now have the smallest lump of dough resting... i can't believe this is gonna feed the three of us.

Not to laugh but LOL!! I'm Irish and my ex hubby is Italian, so I was expected to be the good "Italian" wife & make homemade pasta..... it takes some practice..... I remember making a pile of homemade tortellini for Thanksgiving -- took 5 hours...

Don't overknead or your pasta will be tough!! As you learned, you need to make the sides of your well high enough not to lose your eggs.

Eh! *waving hands Italian style* I just buy my pasta now...can't be bothered....

 

[wnt2bBeast]

LOL
you have to make like a volcano and slowly fold it in otherwise youll dribble egg all over...

lots of flour when kneading otherwise itll stick all over..

wait till you run it through the pasta machine better have someone to catch it on the other end ...

have fun and enjoy

 

[EnderJE]

Sheesh. Its 967 - 11 11.

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

I buy it....

 

[EnderJE]

And from reading the above posts, it makes me think of Three's Company...

 

[Gambino]

can women breast feed with fake boobz?

i've always wondered that.

 

[Carmen]

can women breast feed with fake boobz?

i've always wondered that.

yes. i have real tits too!
i'm going out for pizza... its a disaster in my kitchen. i'm gonna take a pic

 

[jenscats5]

yes. i have real tits too!
i'm going out for pizza... its a disaster in my kitchen. i'm gonna take a pic

Yeah, take pics!! LOL

After making Sauce, homemade bread & pasta every Sunday for ~ 4 years, I can no longer be bothered....

 

[Rex]

lol, reminds me of the Dan Akroyd Julia Child skit where he/she cuts her finger and it starts bleeding all over the place.

Well just call me Mr. Butterfingers.

 

[trinidad]

yes. i have real tits too!
i'm going out for pizza... its a disaster in my kitchen. i'm gonna take a pic

Great boobies!! ( o) ( o )

 

[hamstershaver]

im italian and ill eat chef boy ardee

 

[Raptorex]

im italian and ill eat chef boy ardee

Your not italian then...sorry buddy...

 

[wnt2bBeast]

im italian and ill eat chef boy ardee

shoog ill show you how to do it

 

[canadianhitman]

Yeah, take pics!! LOL

After making Sauce, homemade bread & pasta every Sunday for ~ 4 years, I can no longer be bothered....

LOL....this is why so many Italian (and many other ethnic) men are so close to their mothers and grandmothers (to the chagrin of their wives oftentimes): mama and grandmama can cook rings around you!

 

[Carmen]

shoog ill show you how to do it

hon, i was COVERED in flour and the 5 raviolis i made were the size of calzones.

 

[jenscats5]

LOL....this is why so many Italian (and many other ethnic) men are so close to their mothers and grandmothers (to the chagrin of their wives oftentimes): mama and grandmama can cook rings around you!

Pffffffft!! My ex-hubby admitted my Sauce (red gravy) was better..... plus mommy didn't make homemade bread..... So there.... This Irish girl don't make no Irish Sauce.... (reference of Last Exit to Brooklyn)

 

[Carmen]

i'm russian and my mom is jewish... i make reservations.
lol.. no really, i CAN cook... i'll get the hang of it.

 

[Dial_tone]

I think you better keep Pizza Hut on speed dial, sport.

 

[Carmen]

YO!!! i'm in NY... thats not real pizza!!! lol!!

 

[jenscats5]

i'm russian and my mom is jewish... i make reservations.
lol.. no really, i CAN cook... i'll get the hang of it.

Hon, to save you time & so no one will know the diff. -- buy Wonton Wrappers....they are already cut in squares & the right thickness....just drop a small spoonful of filling, wet the edges & seal.... DONE!!

EZ - CHEE Z

 

[EnderJE]

i'm russian and my mom is jewish... i make reservations.
lol.. no really, i CAN cook... i'll get the hang of it.

With a little help from the Cheffie B?

 

[Dial_tone]

YO!!! i'm in NY... thats not real pizza!!! lol!!

okay, Sal's Famous Pizza then...at least I think that was the place in Do The Right Thing.

 

[Carmen]

okay, Sal's Famous Pizza then...at least I think that was the place in Do The Right Thing.

there is a pizza place on every corner of manhattan and every strip mall on the island... EVERY one of them has better pizza than 90% of the places i've been to in other parts of the country.
i'm not biased- i wasn't born here and i'm not italian, its just what i've noticed.

 

[wootoom]

me italian

 

[Robert Jan]

lol.

Doing it in a bowl was kind of obvious though

but props for even having the patience to make your own pasta

most times im too lazy to even cook it

 

[Carmen]

lol.

Doing it in a bowl was kind of obvious though

but props for even having the patience to make your own pasta

most times im too lazy to even cook it

oh, don't think you're so smart woodenshoeboy, the directions said to work on a counter, not a bowl.
stupid directions. i think i still have flour in my ears.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

there is a pizza place on every corner of manhattan and every strip mall on the island... EVERY one of them has better pizza than 90% of the places i've been to in other parts of the country.
i'm not biased- i wasn't born here and i'm not italian, its just what i've noticed.

ive traveled a lot as well outside of NY pizza sucks everywhere..
once in california i went into a pizza place and ask if they make "sicilian" pies and the girl said: is that like a calzone?

 

[Mr. dB]

there is a pizza place on every corner of manhattan and every strip mall on the island... EVERY one of them has better pizza than 90% of the places i've been to in other parts of the country.
i'm not biased- i wasn't born here and i'm not italian, its just what i've noticed.

This is a true fact.

 

[theoak01]

speaking of italians,has anyone ever watched growing up Gotti on a&e?

 

[wnt2bBeast]

speaking of italians,has anyone ever watched growing up Gotti on a&e?

what about it..those kids need to be beaten to a pulp..if iever talked to my mother like that she would kick teh shit outta me

 

[theoak01]

just wondering if anyone watched it,there is a marathon on,I caught a few episodes and got bored and disgusted with the spoiled brats behaviour towards their mom and people in general

 

[wnt2bBeast]

just wondering if anyone watched it,there is a marathon on,I caught a few episodes and got bored and disgusted with the spoiled brats behaviour towards their mom and people in general

i didnt even make it through a full episode..i cant belive that the "gotti" family let them put that garbage on the air...they look so stupid its not even funny

 

[Carmen]

lol.. i can't watch it. i wanna smack those boys so badly. btw, that takes place right near us.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

lol.. i can't watch it. i wanna smack those boys so badly. btw, that takes place right near us.

yes i know those people sort of
remember i AM italian

 

[EnderJE]

yes i know those people sort of
remember i AM italian

so, you'll be on next week?

here's beasts cameo
here's beast giving the beats
series finale

new pilot
beast giving beats

 

[Carmen]

so, you'll be on next week?

here's beasts cameo
here's beast giving the beats
series finale

new pilot
beast giving beats

lol... he's big and scarwy.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

so, you'll be on next week?

here's beasts cameo
here's beast giving the beats
series finale

new pilot
beast giving beats

 

[EnderJE]

lol... he's big and scarwy.

hey ol' lady..

you can have a part too.
whenever the cops come by...just flash'em so he can make his getaway...

 

[Carmen]

hey ol' lady..

you can have a part too.
whenever the cops come by...just flash'em so he can make his getaway...

is that like a vulcan mind thing where they will get hypnotised?
it doesn't work.

i mean... i don't think it works.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

hey ol' lady..

you can have a part too.
whenever the cops come by...just flash'em so he can make his getaway...

seems like youre the director LOL

 

[EnderJE]

seems like youre the director LOL

lol...

Have you seen what passes on Fox now? I'm sure I could go better.

 

[Carmen]

can i have a cool outfit and carry a gun? and wear really high heels that my stunt double has to run in?

 

[EnderJE]

can i have a cool outfit and carry a gun? and wear really high heels that my stunt double has to run in?

I was thinking more of a see through bikini. And I thought that you already had two guns and two bazookas.

And no, you'll HAVE to do the running....for viewers....yeah..our viewers.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

can i have a cool outfit and carry a gun? and wear really high heels that my stunt double has to run in?

as long as you wear a pink thong and a light blue bra

 

[TC2]

Pffffffft!! My ex-hubby admitted my Sauce (red gravy) was better..... plus mommy didn't make homemade bread..... So there.... This Irish girl don't make no Irish Sauce.... (reference of Last Exit to Brooklyn)

Damn, your ex must've been old school Italian...I have'nt heard anybody call sauce "gravy" in a long long time..

 

[DEEZPAZ]

is that like a vulcan mind thing where they will get hypnotised?
it doesn't work.

i mean... i don't think it works.

OH it works, it DEFINITLEY works!!!

I stared at your last avatar for over 3 hours the other day!!!

 

[Carmen]

as long as you wear a pink thong and a light blue bra

lol... shows you who has a bad memory... you got the colors reversed.

 

[big4life]

That's the way I see the cooks on TV make pasta. I just buy mine from the store or the deli.

 

[Carmen]

That's the way I see the cooks on TV make pasta. I just buy mine from the store or the deli.

i cleaned all the dried pasta off- i'll try again tomorrow. i'm a gluten for punishment.

 

[Dial_tone]

i cleaned all the dried pasta off- i'll try again tomorrow. i'm a gluten for punishment.

dohhhh!

 

[Carmen]

dohhhh!

lol.. YAY! someone got it!

 

[Dial_tone]

lol.. YAY! someone got it!

you really kneed a beating for that one.

 

[Carmen]

you really kneed a beating for that one.

I'll never be battered.

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

 

[Dial_tone]

I'll never be battered.

well, here's hoping you rise to the occasion on your next attempt.

 

[wnt2bBeast]

lol... shows you who has a bad memory... you got the colors reversed.

dammit..i knew it was the other way around
btw you left a sock here

 

[Carmen]

dammit..i knew it was the other way around
btw you left a sock here

THATS why one foot is so cold!

 

[wnt2bBeast]

THATS why one foot is so cold!

yeah i wore it all day then realized it had some lace around it
i dont remember buying those lol

 

[jenscats5]

Damn, your ex must've been old school Italian...I have'nt heard anybody call sauce "gravy" in a long long time..

Actually his family called spaghetti sauce "Sauce" with a Capital S & sometimes gravy..... But yep, kinda old school....... I was expected to feed him till he got fat & get fat myself.....


LOL @ SP & DT!!

 

[KillahBee]

Actually his family called spaghetti sauce "Sauce" with a Capital S & sometimes gravy..... But yep, kinda old school....... I was expected to feed him till he got fat & get fat myself.....


LOL @ SP & DT!!

I have always called it gravy as have my friends and family.

 

[Mr. dB]

I'm hungry for Italian food. Make me some gnocci!

 

[Carmen]

I'm hungry for Italian food. Make me some gnocci!

baked ziti today.

 

[Dial_tone]

Somebody should dough-nate some time to help you with the recipe.