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Last night at the bar... my first kiss

H

healother

New member
prefix:

So those 3 girls I met from craigslist at the hot tub party the other week go to this modern rock bar on Tuesday nights, great drink specials, contests and great crowd.

Only 1 of these girls has a instant messenger thing they use online, so I was talking to her and telling her to let me know when they go to this bar next. Unfortunately she doesnt really say much to me, and made it sound like she didnt know if she was going.

story:

So last night I go to the bar anyway, alone because I couldnt find anyone to go with. And this girl and her friend are there. I talk to her for a bit, she's kinda iffy and not saying much though. So then I go up to the bar to get a drink.

And this girl asks me, "hey are you a marine? " a real cute asian girl. her friend is standing next to her, caucasian and pretty cute, dark short hair, curvy but not fat. I said "no im not, actually, interesting you say that though because others have said similar things" (which is true, many tell me i could pass for one) the asian girl says "oh, yeah well me and my friend were thinking you could pass for one, with the short hair cut, clothing, build, posture, etc, haha" and her friend was like "yeah" agreeing with her.
(keep in mind i was wearing a khaki colored shirt, khaki pants, just shaved my head down to half an inch, and have a stocky build)

So we were laughing and started talking, the asian is named "Goda" the caucasion was "Jessi" well Jessi starts talking to me a bunch, and is pretty cool. We get some drinks and sit down, and just start getting to know each other. I tried to get them to sit down with the other friends i met there but their table was too small, so i hung out with these 2 new chicks i met :)

so we sit at the bar, start getting dollar drinks, and are just feeling great, and Jessi is all coming onto me, and I'm feeling the same towards her. She starts talking about how cute she thought I was and that she is really shy normally, and that her friend basically talked to me for her, otherwise she wouldnt have been able to approach me. Her friend Goda (the asian girl) says she has a boyfriend. (later i find out Goda didnt have a boyfriend and Jessi admits that was just a tactic to keep me from talking to Goda more) So meanwhile I'm focused on Jessi. We exchange numbers. We both watch a thong contest between 4 really hot girls (which kicked major ass!) and later sit back down in a great mood. She is telling me she wants to kiss me, but is worried i wont call her the next day. I reassure her that I will call her later, and then admit that I havent kissed a girl before. She talks about how awesome that is and how she wants to kiss me so bad. So we are just looking at each other and then we go for it..

I'm not caring what anyone around me is thinking, I'm just in the mood and kissing a girl for my first time, haha. It felt great, later we start going for more and she and me are both getting pretty into it. I basically wanted to smooch all over her, haha. We got our arms grabbing each other and stuff. she said she's going to give me a few pointers, and learn how to tease kiss, pull back, and then go in for more. so i practice that copying her moves, and she says im super good at copying her and picking up on it. so then we just go for it and are making out like crazy, just completely lost in the moment, I'm loving the feeling of her tounge, her teeth softly biting my lip, the way she grabs my head, touches my chest, back, butt as well.

The people are screaming "get a room!" So we go outside and smooch more, but its freezing outside so we go back inside and smooch again, hahaha. We just would stop talk for a bit, and pick up where we left off haha.

So later at closing time we are invited to a bonfire that is happening later. We go there, and i started talking to some cool dudes, but not really a good makeout opportunity because we were in a small group and outside, nowhere to sit, the guy didnt even have chairs in his yard.

so later we leave, i get home at around 4. get up for work at 7, feeling just fine. remember the sensation on my lips, haha.

And then tonight i called her and we are definately hanging out again sometime :)

I feel so much better after doing this. I mean honestly the first kiss wasn't that big a deal, it felt pretty good, she said it seemed like a movie it was that good. I dunno, I guess I thought it'd be more special (maybe woulda helped if we werent in a bar, haha) but it was pretty cool as it was.

I feel good knowing that I can successfully attract a woman, because I've finally had an experience that shows I can. This girl was into me as much as I was into her and we both thought each other were cute and enjoyed our time together thoroughly.

I'm not sure if this will really work out or not. We are both shy and have that in common, she's more into tattoos and piercings than I am, but she seems cool enough. We both live with strict parents. But she's definately been much more of a rebel than I have, haha.

--------------

Cliffs:
-I try to get invited to go with some girls i met on craigslist to this cool bar on Tues night. But they dont inform me when they are going next.
-I just show up to the bar randomly, bump into craigslist girls, talk to them for a bit, and get a drink.
-Meet 2 way cooler girls who think i look like a marine, and I start drinking and hanging out with them, I'm having a blast.
-Talk to Jessie, really hit it off with her, get her number
-I kiss Jessie, having the first kiss of my life :)
-We make out a ton, and just have a blast :)
-There is a lame bonfire afterwards
-I call her the next day we are definately hanging out again :)
-Good experience, now where will this go, if anywhere? lol
 
Last edited:
alcohol has 7cals per gram
 
healother said:
We go there, and i started talking to some cool dudes, but not really a good makeout opportunity because we were in a small group and outside, nowhere to sit, the guy didnt even have chairs in his hard.
Click to expand...


wtf??
 
Nice work.

Don't get hurt if you never here from her or she blows you off.
 
bravo young flexygellatin, bravo
now time to round second and gear up for third
third is really what can make or break you
 
healother said:
prefix:

So those 3 girls I met from craigslist at the hot tub party the other week go to this modern rock bar on Tuesday nights, great drink specials, contests and great crowd.

Only 1 of these girls has a instant messenger thing they use online, so I was talking to her and telling her to let me know when they go to this bar next. Unfortunately she doesnt really say much to me, and made it sound like she didnt know if she was going.

story:

So last night I go to the bar anyway, alone because I couldnt find anyone to go with. And this girl and her friend are there. I talk to her for a bit, she's kinda iffy and not saying much though. So then I go up to the bar to get a drink.

And this girl asks me, "hey are you a marine? " a real cute asian girl. her friend is standing next to her, caucasian and pretty cute, dark short hair, curvy but not fat. I said "no im not, actually, interesting you say that though because others have said similar things" (which is true, many tell me i could pass for one) the asian girl says "oh, yeah well me and my friend were thinking you could pass for one, with the short hair cut, clothing, build, posture, etc, haha" and her friend was like "yeah" agreeing with her.
(keep in mind i was wearing a khaki colored shirt, khaki pants, just shaved my head down to half an inch, and have a stocky build)

So we were laughing and started talking, the asian is named "Goda" the caucasion was "Jessi" well Jessi starts talking to me a bunch, and is pretty cool. We get some drinks and sit down, and just start getting to know each other. I tried to get them to sit down with the other friends i met there but their table was too small, so i hung out with these 2 new chicks i met :)

so we sit at the bar, start getting dollar drinks, and are just feeling great, and Jessi is all coming onto me, and I'm feeling the same towards her. She starts talking about how cute she thought I was and that she is really shy normally, and that her friend basically talked to me for her, otherwise she wouldnt have been able to approach me. Her friend Goda (the asian girl) says she has a boyfriend. (later i find out Goda didnt have a boyfriend and Jessi admits that was just a tactic to keep me from talking to Goda more) So meanwhile I'm focused on Jessi. We exchange numbers. We both watch a thong contest between 4 really hot girls (which kicked major ass!) and later sit back down in a great mood. She is telling me she wants to kiss me, but is worried i wont call her the next day. I reassure her that I will call her later, and then admit that I havent kissed a girl before. She talks about how awesome that is and how she wants to kiss me so bad. So we are just looking at each other and then we go for it..

I'm not caring what anyone around me is thinking, I'm just in the mood and kissing a girl for my first time, haha. It felt great, later we start going for more and she and me are both getting pretty into it. I basically wanted to smooch all over her, haha. We got our arms grabbing each other and stuff. she said she's going to give me a few pointers, and learn how to tease kiss, pull back, and then go in for more. so i practice that copying her moves, and she says im super good at copying her and picking up on it. so then we just go for it and are making out like crazy, just completely lost in the moment, I'm loving the feeling of her tounge, her teeth softly biting my lip, the way she grabs my head, touches my chest, back, butt as well.

The people are screaming "get a room!" So we go outside and smooch more, but its freezing outside so we go back inside and smooch again, hahaha. We just would stop talk for a bit, and pick up where we left off haha.

So later at closing time we are invited to a bonfire that is happening later. We go there, and i started talking to some cool dudes, but not really a good makeout opportunity because we were in a small group and outside, nowhere to sit, the guy didnt even have chairs in his yard.

so later we leave, i get home at around 4. get up for work at 7, feeling just fine. remember the sensation on my lips, haha.

And then tonight i called her and we are definately hanging out again sometime :)

I feel so much better after doing this. I mean honestly the first kiss wasn't that big a deal, it felt pretty good, she said it seemed like a movie it was that good. I dunno, I guess I thought it'd be more special (maybe woulda helped if we werent in a bar, haha) but it was pretty cool as it was.

I feel good knowing that I can successfully attract a woman, because I've finally had an experience that shows I can. This girl was into me as much as I was into her and we both thought each other were cute and enjoyed our time together thoroughly.

I'm not sure if this will really work out or not. We are both shy and have that in common, she's more into tattoos and piercings than I am, but she seems cool enough. We both live with strict parents. But she's definately been much more of a rebel than I have, haha.

--------------

Cliffs:
-I try to get invited to go with some girls i met on craigslist to this cool bar on Tues night. But they dont inform me when they are going next.
-I just show up to the bar randomly, bump into craigslist girls, talk to them for a bit, and get a drink.
-Meet 2 way cooler girls who think i look like a marine, and I start drinking and hanging out with them, I'm having a blast.
-Talk to Jessie, really hit it off with her, get her number
-I kiss Jessie, having the first kiss of my life :)
-We make out a ton, and just have a blast :)
-There is a lame bonfire afterwards
-I call her the next day we are definately hanging out again :)
-Good experience, now where will this go, if anywhere? lol
Click to expand...


thanks for the cliff notes..

our baby is growing up, we're so proud...
jk

congrats man..
 
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Reactions: bw1
string_bean00 said:
even though I've actually fucked girls and all, healother has me beat on the going out solo deal; I couldn't do that shit

keep it up man
Click to expand...
That takes balls for sure. Great work keep it up. :)
 
string_bean00 said:
and if he gets into third standing up bust balls for home
Click to expand...
get to third, steal home and get tagged out...most often you'll get another crack at bat...
pop fly out and you can pretty much hang up the cleats lol
 
Gambino said:
get to third, steal home and get tagged out...most often you'll get another crack at bat...
pop fly out and you can pretty much hang up the cleats lol
Click to expand...



bats, cleats, wtf is going on here
 
im not even in the mood but im having a beer ;)

well done, mr gel

next step - even tho you want to hang out with her all the time and all that...DONT! just WAIT! 2-3 messages a day for a bit, let her miss you/want you, then meet again. at a bar. at midnight. already having had 3 drinks. because you had a party to go to before (meanwhile, you were at home in your Y fronts). friday is the day

lots of haters in thie thread btw
 
So tell us, Heal ...
































Did you get all tingly in your special place? :qt:
 
should have lied and said you were in the marines and that you were a pilot.. You would have got pussy easily
 
so i called her tonight, hoping she wanted to hangout again, but she said she was feeling lazy and didnt want to have to get ready or anything.
what do i say to that?

she said tomorrow maybe her friends and my friends could meet and we all could go clubbing. i said that could be fun.

i want to just hangout with her not at a bar or club sometime, maybe we'll do that over the weekend, i dont know. something tells me she doesnt want to hangout just for the sake of making out. i guess she only wants to do that when shes drunk :(

also something tells me she doesnt take our possibility for a relationship very seriously. i wonder if i should go ahead and makeout with the next girl i meet when im at a club. or would that be bad? i hope she isnt making out with other dudes, but for all i knew she might be :( she had said that she didnt think of us as in a relationship. im thinking crap, i guess that means you cant really be in a relationship with a girl if you makeout with her right away, cuz then she wont take it seriously :(
 
healother said:
so i called her tonight, hoping she wanted to hangout again, but she said she was feeling lazy and didnt want to have to get ready or anything.
what do i say to that?

she said tomorrow maybe her friends and my friends could meet and we all could go clubbing. i said that could be fun.

i want to just hangout with her not at a bar or club sometime, maybe we'll do that over the weekend, i dont know. something tells me she doesnt want to hangout just for the sake of making out. i guess she only wants to do that when shes drunk :(

also something tells me she doesnt take her or my relationship very seriously. i wonder if i should go ahead and makeout with the next girl i meet when im at a club.
or would that be bad? i hope she isnt making out with other dudes, but for all i knew she might be :( she had said that she didnt think of us as in a relationship. im thinking crap, i guess that means you cant really be in a relationship with a girl if you makeout with her right away, cuz then she wont take it seriously :(
Click to expand...


Drunk kissing in a bar does not constitute a relationship. There is nothing to take seriously yet.
 
healother said:
so i called her tonight, hoping she wanted to hangout again, but she said she was feeling lazy and didnt want to have to get ready or anything.
what do i say to that?

she said tomorrow maybe her friends and my friends could meet and we all could go clubbing. i said that could be fun.

i want to just hangout with her not at a bar or club sometime, maybe we'll do that over the weekend, i dont know. something tells me she doesnt want to hangout just for the sake of making out. i guess she only wants to do that when shes drunk :(

also something tells me she doesnt take our relationship very seriously. i wonder if i should go ahead and makeout with the next girl i meet when im at a club. or would that be bad? i hope she isnt making out with other dudes, but for all i knew she might be :( she had said that she didnt think of us as in a relationship. im thinking crap, i guess that means you cant really be in a relationship with a girl if you makeout with her right away, cuz then she wont take it seriously :(
Click to expand...
hmm....so one night at the bar makes a relationship, huh?
 
This is only the beginning, now the learning begins. You blew your wad too soon calling her the next day after making out, gotta let everything marinate a little while and who knows, maybe she would call you. By waiting to call her you show that you arent desperate and anxious to see her again. It shows you are confident in yourself and confident she isnt going to run off on you. And if she does? Who gives a shit because she knows you wont care because you are blowing her off since you are a busy and happening guy who doesnt need to hang on a woman too soon.
Next date still needs to be fun and loose, dont look like you are too anxious to get her in bed or anything so keep it to public stuff like bars, clubs, restaurants. And if you really want to throw her for a loop and make her want you, wait until the very last minute to make a move on her. Keep her guessing whether or not you are even interested in her beyond friends most of the night, then kiss her at the last minute.
 
superdave said:
This is only the beginning, now the learning begins. You blew your wad too soon calling her the next day after making out, gotta let everything marinate a little while and who knows, maybe she would call you. By waiting to call her you show that you arent desperate and anxious to see her again. It shows you are confident in yourself and confident she isnt going to run off on you. And if she does? Who gives a shit because she knows you wont care because you are blowing her off since you are a busy and happening guy who doesnt need to hang on a woman too soon.
Next date still needs to be fun and loose, dont look like you are too anxious to get her in bed or anything so keep it to public stuff like bars, clubs, restaurants. And if you really want to throw her for a loop and make her want you, wait until the very last minute to make a move on her. Keep her guessing whether or not you are even interested in her beyond friends most of the night, then kiss her at the last minute.
Click to expand...

she didnt even have my number, i had hers, she left her phone in the car. and she insisted that i called her the next day. she even found my on myspace.com (using my first name and my city zip code) and messaged me saying the other night was insane.

i dunno, i guess i just want to do fun guy/girl things with her. i dont want to always be hanging out with her at a bar/club, but maybe your right, maybe it has to start that way.

and now she started talking to me online, so now i have to learn how to talk online with women! (something ive never been that good at. im not sure how much im supposed to respond to them and how much im supposed to not care)

so do i makeout with other girls in the mean time?
 
healother said:
she didnt even have my number, i had hers, she left her phone in the car. and she insisted that i called her the next day. she even found my on myspace.com (using my first name and my city zip code) and messaged me saying the other night was insane.

i dunno, i guess i just want to do fun guy/girl things with her. i dont want to always be hanging out with her at a bar/club, but maybe your right, maybe it has to start that way.

and now she started talking to me online, so now i have to learn how to talk online with women! (something ive never been that good at. im not sure how much im supposed to respond to them and how much im supposed to not care)

so do i makeout with other girls in the mean time?
Click to expand...
If she insisted you call the next day its a judgment call on your part, you could have but if you really wanted to set the tone early I would have waited just one more day then called. But if you really hit it off together and she seems like a sweet type then you might not want to jerk her around too much. Different types of girls respond to different treatment, one girl may get off on guys that are jerks and blow them off, others may not like that and forget about you. With experience you will learn what types of girls warrant what type of treatment. The bottom line is you are taking a risk whenever you cave in and start giving a girl too much attention too soon. That risk is her taking advantage of your niceness. But like I said, depending on what type of girl she is you might not want to start those little mind games yet. The problem with your situation is you are novice, so in order to safely undertake this whole dating thing, its probably best you do things like wait to call, make sure shes more into you than you are into her, etc. Its for your own confidence and protection.
Yes, make out with other girls, if anything you need experience with the actual physical act. Plus this current chick may flake out and you will be left with your dick in your hand. Just like that one time Im sure you remember.
 
hey heal other im from mpls down by the U, if u come down to the campus bars youd have much better luck with the college gals if u wanna get some poosy
 
superdave said:
If she insisted you call the next day its a judgment call on your part, you could have but if you really wanted to set the tone early I would have waited just one more day then called. But if you really hit it off together and she seems like a sweet type then you might not want to jerk her around too much. Different types of girls respond to different treatment, one girl may get off on guys that are jerks and blow them off, others may not like that and forget about you. With experience you will learn what types of girls warrant what type of treatment. The bottom line is you are taking a risk whenever you cave in and start giving a girl too much attention too soon. That risk is her taking advantage of your niceness. But like I said, depending on what type of girl she is you might not want to start those little mind games yet. The problem with your situation is you are novice, so in order to safely undertake this whole dating thing, its probably best you do things like wait to call, make sure shes more into you than you are into her, etc. Its for your own confidence and protection.
Yes, make out with other girls, if anything you need experience with the actual physical act. Plus this current chick may flake out and you will be left with your dick in your hand. Just like that one time Im sure you remember.
Click to expand...

people take risks by not paying enough attention to a girl too though, right?
uggghhhh. you're right she could flake out, and im not sure if i sense a whole lot of devotion from her, or if she'd make out with a dude at a bar or not, haha.
 
healother said:
people take risks by not paying enough attention to a girl too though, right?
uggghhhh. you're right she could flake out, and im not sure if i sense a whole lot of devotion from her, or if she'd make out with a dude at a bar or not, haha.
Click to expand...
did you get aroused during the make out session? did you feel her out, i.e., touching her boobs/ass....?
 
healother said:
people take risks by not paying enough attention to a girl too though, right?
uggghhhh. you're right she could flake out, and im not sure if i sense a whole lot of devotion from her, or if she'd make out with a dude at a bar or not, haha.
Click to expand...
Your risk of getting burned is greater than your risk of missing out on a good relationship because you are a novice and havent yet built up your thick skin for dealing with women and getting ignored or burned. If you miss out on a good relationship you would never know it...out of sight out of mind so who cares. But if you get burned you definetely know it.....because it just happened to you. You also dont yet have the insight to determine who is relationship worthy, so best to adopt an attitude that protects you first while allowing you to gain experience.
Your attitude now should be "care the least about the relationship between the two of you". Now this takes practice and is best effective if somewhat subtle. Things like waiting an extra day to call her when she told you to, or showing up 10 minutes late to a date, or not answering her every call. Little things like that show you dont always have her on your mind and that will make her willing to invest more time and energy into the relationship in order to get more attention from you, even though she is already getting attention from you, its just not quite what she is used to (if she is hot then she is used to schmucks falling over themselves to get with her, do what I said above)
 
jiggagold said:
hey heal other im from mpls down by the U, if u come down to the campus bars youd have much better luck with the college gals if u wanna get some poosy
Click to expand...

hey jigga, thanks for the tip! :) so why is that? are college girls just more horny? or is it cuz more girls are at those bars?
ps: We should have an EF meetup, SpyWizard is also from your area, we could go out and be wingmen for each other or something, lol

Nobledude said:
did you get aroused during the make out session? did you feel her out, i.e., touching her boobs/ass....?
Click to expand...

hell yeah i did, i touched her ass a bit after she touched mine, i wanted to touch her boobs and did a bit when she put my arm there, haha. i would have done more but ppl in the bar were hollering at us 2 to get a room, lol.
I was grinding myself into her once while we were making out too. i was hard :)

superdave said:
Your risk of getting burned is greater than your risk of missing out on a good relationship because you are a novice and havent yet built up your thick skin for dealing with women and getting ignored or burned. If you miss out on a good relationship you would never know it...out of sight out of mind so who cares. But if you get burned you definetely know it.....because it just happened to you. You also dont yet have the insight to determine who is relationship worthy, so best to adopt an attitude that protects you first while allowing you to gain experience.
Your attitude now should be "care the least about the relationship between the two of you". Now this takes practice and is best effective if somewhat subtle. Things like waiting an extra day to call her when she told you to, or showing up 10 minutes late to a date, or not answering her every call. Little things like that show you dont always have her on your mind and that will make her willing to invest more time and energy into the relationship in order to get more attention from you, even though she is already getting attention from you, its just not quite what she is used to (if she is hot then she is used to schmucks falling over themselves to get with her, do what I said above)
Click to expand...


what does it mean to get burned? how is that any different than if you dont talk to her and she doesnt call you? lol. so is burned like if you are interested but she isnt? or is it if she doesnt something to you?

In any case, I think you raise a good point how being detached could wind up meaning a better turnout. I think the general concept you have is smart, but making rules about it is where i get a sick feeling. I'm willing to follow principles, honest principles. And not being too needy to a girl is plenty honest, and it shows a sign of respect if you can be ok without her, because then you arent using her or pestering her too much.
 
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most college girls at the bars tend to go out looking for guys and are out for a good time, and yes there tends to be a lot more girls out drinking on campus just because it is the college standard
 
Girls are not horny every day like guys.
Everything is based on their 28 day cycle.
So once again you fucked up, next time you see her she will not be horny.
You're an idiot.
Count 28 days from that first makeout session and call her then!


healother said:
hell yeah i did, i touched her ass a bit after she touched mine, i wanted to touch her boobs and did a bit when she put my arm there, haha. i would have done more but ppl in the bar were hollering at us 2 to get a room, lol.
I was grinding myself into her once while we were making out too. i was hard :)
Click to expand...
 
jiggagold said:
most college girls at the bars tend to go out looking for guys and are out for a good time, and yes there tends to be a lot more girls out drinking on campus just because it is the college standard
Click to expand...


Minneapolis..
uptown... williams bar... 3:1 ratio of women.. 26-32 a good mix professional, and just a smattering of goth/punk..

good times..
 
healother said:
people take risks by not paying enough attention to a girl too though, right?
uggghhhh. you're right she could flake out, and im not sure if i sense a whole lot of devotion from her, or if she'd make out with a dude at a bar or not, haha.
Click to expand...
The risk you take from not paying enough attention from a girl is that she wont pay enough attention to you to keep you interested. And if she doesnt than so what, move on. But if you give a girl too much attention then she burns you then you will feel like a fool for giving her the time of day. Thats the difference. So in order to facilitate your learning experience without causing you too much heartache you should ALWAYS be the one who cares just a little less about the relationship between you and her.
 
superdave said:
The risk you take from not paying enough attention from a girl is that she wont pay enough attention to you to keep you interested. And if she doesnt than so what, move on. But if you give a girl too much attention then she burns you then you will feel like a fool for giving her the time of day. Thats the difference. So in order to facilitate your learning experience without causing you too much heartache you should ALWAYS be the one who cares just a little less about the relationship between you and her.
Click to expand...
Dr.Phil..... :)
 
superdave said:
If she insisted you call the next day its a judgment call on your part, you could have but if you really wanted to set the tone early I would have waited just one more day then called. But if you really hit it off together and she seems like a sweet type then you might not want to jerk her around too much. Different types of girls respond to different treatment, one girl may get off on guys that are jerks and blow them off, others may not like that and forget about you. With experience you will learn what types of girls warrant what type of treatment. The bottom line is you are taking a risk whenever you cave in and start giving a girl too much attention too soon. That risk is her taking advantage of your niceness. But like I said, depending on what type of girl she is you might not want to start those little mind games yet. The problem with your situation is you are novice, so in order to safely undertake this whole dating thing, its probably best you do things like wait to call, make sure shes more into you than you are into her, etc. Its for your own confidence and protection.
Yes, make out with other girls, if anything you need experience with the actual physical act. Plus this current chick may flake out and you will be left with your dick in your hand. Just like that one time Im sure you remember.
Click to expand...

So much work and bullshit. Like Ive said before, I used to just stand there and wait and they knew what was on my mind.
 
what a fuckin stupid fuckin thread, healother im waiting for u to cut me down,please i need a reason
 
good job bro. don't get too wrapped up in this one encounter, use it to build upon
 
Haven't hunig out here in a while, but it's telling, that h o actually puts clif notes at the end of his posts, :lmao:. I LOL'd for real.
 
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SpyWizard said:
Minneapolis..
uptown... williams bar... 3:1 ratio of women.. 26-32 a good mix professional, and just a smattering of goth/punk..

good times..
Click to expand...

we should meetup down there sometime and be wingmen for each other.

superdave said:
The risk you take from not paying enough attention from a girl is that she wont pay enough attention to you to keep you interested. And if she doesnt than so what, move on. But if you give a girl too much attention then she burns you then you will feel like a fool for giving her the time of day. Thats the difference. So in order to facilitate your learning experience without causing you too much heartache you should ALWAYS be the one who cares just a little less about the relationship between you and her.
Click to expand...


whatever happened to taking risks and learning to deal with rejection? people are always telling me i need to make moves and stop being a pussy.

Lestat said:
good job bro. don't get too wrapped up in this one encounter, use it to build upon
Click to expand...

we might be hanging out more. we hungout tonight and watched a movie.
but your right, i need to have a backup plan, incase she fails me.
 
healother said:
whatever happened to taking risks and learning to deal with rejection? people are always telling me i need to make moves and stop being a pussy.
we might be hanging out more. we hungout tonight and watched a movie.
but your right, i need to have a backup plan, incase she fails me.
Click to expand...
Youre already practicing risk management. Of course you should make some moves and initiate certain things but never invest more than youre willing to lose with a woman you dont know well. Its give and take so make sure you arent the one doing all the giving.
 
healother said:
we should meetup down there sometime and be wingmen for each other.




whatever happened to taking risks and learning to deal with rejection? people are always telling me i need to make moves and stop being a pussy.



we might be hanging out more. we hungout tonight and watched a movie.
but your right, i need to have a backup plan, incase she fails me.
Click to expand...

DUDE!!!

Call me, I'll send you a ticket to come here I will introduce you to all the girls at the Mens Club! You will not only get kissed but you will actually get LAID!

Then I won't have to hear all this pussy shit from a male! A movie? Three women and a porno is a date at the movies.
:santa:
 
Last edited:
Steve. chop your dick off. feed it to a starving dog. now you've accomplised 2 things:
1- nourished, briefly, a poor animal.
2- ridded yourself of that bothersome penis. i bet you get laid more w/o it. now you can play Starcraft all night and shit....
 
congrats on the first kiss.. i remember my first makeout session i had a raging boner..
 
UPDATE:

so tonight I went and watched half a movie with her, but then she got a call from a drunk guy friend who needed a ride home from work cuz he got trashed while he was at work. He said he would drive home drunk if she didnt come out and drive him. So she stopped the movie partway to go out there.

She knew i was going clubbing tonight, so she said that I should come over to this party they were having when i got done clubbing. so i called at 2am and asked where the place was and she says "oh im too drunk, you shouldnt come over." i asked why, and she said "because there are too many guys here, and I dont want you to get mad if you see them hitting on me. I dont want any drama." I said "no dont worry, drunk guys hit on women, there wont be any drama" She said "well i dont want you to get the wrong idea thinking im trying to work you over or anything, so lets hangout tomorrow. Id like to hangout with you one on one more, I liked hanging out with you today, I'll give you a call after i wake up, how does that sound?" I said "ok" and then that was that.

Something tells me what she doesnt want me to see is her making out and possibly getting banged by a bunch of drunk dudes. Oh well. I dunno if I should care or not. I mean we're not dating. but we probably wont be, if either of us keeps this promiscuous behavior up, lol. (yes ive been acting promiscous lately, read my clubbing thread posted on 4/21)

superdave said:
Youre already practicing risk management. Of course you should make some moves and initiate certain things but never invest more than youre willing to lose with a woman you dont know well. Its give and take so make sure you arent the one doing all the giving.
Click to expand...

alright, that makes more sense i think.

Grumpy Old Man said:
DUDE!!!

Call me, I'll send you a ticket to come here I will introduce you to all the girls at the Mens Club! You will not only get kissed but you will actually get LAID!

Then I won't have to hear all this pussy shit from a male! A movie? Three women and a porno is a date at the movies.
:santa:
Click to expand...

you're very nice GOM :) I'd love to come down to Texas sometime. I'm not sure if I'm looking to come back with 3 STDs, but partying it up with you and your women in texas would be a blast! lol.

Phaded said:
congrats on the first kiss.. i remember my first makeout session i had a raging boner..
Click to expand...

yeah, i had a boner, not raging, but it was there. she probably felt it when i pressed into her, hahaha.
 
Grumpy Old Man said:
DUDE!!!

Call me, I'll send you a ticket to come here I will introduce you to all the girls at the Mens Club! You will not only get kissed but you will actually get LAID!

Then I won't have to hear all this pussy shit from a male! A movie? Three women and a porno is a date at the movies.
:santa:
Click to expand...

Do you own that place? I've been there with friends in the past.
 
healother said:
UPDATE:

so tonight I went and watched half a movie with her, but then she got a call from a drunk guy friend who needed a ride home from work cuz he got trashed while he was at work. He said he would drive home drunk if she didnt come out and drive him. So she stopped the movie partway to go out there.

She knew i was going clubbing tonight, so she said that I should come over to this party they were having when i got done clubbing. so i called at 2am and asked where the place was and she says "oh im too drunk, you shouldnt come over." i asked why, and she said "because there are too many guys here, and I dont want you to get mad if you see them hitting on me. I dont want any drama." I said "no dont worry, drunk guys hit on women, there wont be any drama" She said "well i dont want you to get the wrong idea thinking im trying to work you over or anything, so lets hangout tomorrow. Id like to hangout with you one on one more, I liked hanging out with you today, I'll give you a call after i wake up, how does that sound?" I said "ok" and then that was that.

Something tells me what she doesnt want me to see is her making out and possibly getting banged by a bunch of drunk dudes. Oh well. I dunno if I should care or not. I mean we're not dating. but we probably wont be, if either of us keeps this promiscuous behavior up, lol. (yes ive been acting promiscous lately, read my clubbing thread posted on 4/21)
.
Click to expand...

Drop her, now. Dont even call her, just move on. See how easy this can be?
 
wtf. she's grooming you to be her bitchboy. you'll give her backrubs & braid her hair, but you'll never get a whiff of that pussy. you had your chance to squash that shit when that dude called. you coulda played that so many ways and come out on top, but you were passive again. you coulda called him out on his weak ass threat on driving drunk & making it her responsibility to take care of him, etc....on & on....i swear, you're gonna be sweater shopping for that drunk dude with her, if you let this keep up...
 
HumanTarget said:
wtf. she's grooming you to be her bitchboy. you'll give her backrubs & braid her hair, but you'll never get a whiff of that pussy. you had your chance to squash that shit when that dude called. you coulda played that so many ways and come out on top, but you were passive again. you coulda called him out on his weak ass threat on driving drunk & making it her responsibility to take care of him, etc....on & on....i swear, you're gonna be sweater shopping for that drunk dude with her, if you let this keep up...
Click to expand...
This is pretty much the only other alternative to dropping her, as I said to do.
 
UPDATE:

Confirmed, this girl is a skank. i talked to her this morning online and then on the phone. apparently last night she was absolutely trashed at a party with lots of single guys, who were all macking on her. she made out with a few dudes, and one guy she let him fuck her, without a condum. she said he was a virgin. she said she barely remembers any of it though.

she doesnt even remember calling me last night and telling me not to come.

granted i let a girl put her hand in my pants at the club, but at least i didnt have unprotected sex with a stranger.

wow this is just fucked up.

superdave said:
Drop her, now. Dont even call her, just move on. See how easy this can be?
Click to expand...

how easy? are you being sarcastic or serious?

anyways though, after hearing about her slut fest last night, it seems pretty easy to drop her.

HumanTarget said:
wtf. she's grooming you to be her bitchboy. you'll give her backrubs & braid her hair, but you'll never get a whiff of that pussy. you had your chance to squash that shit when that dude called. you coulda played that so many ways and come out on top, but you were passive again. you coulda called him out on his weak ass threat on driving drunk & making it her responsibility to take care of him, etc....on & on....i swear, you're gonna be sweater shopping for that drunk dude with her, if you let this keep up...
Click to expand...

yeah, i would have said "dont pick him up" but i didnt want to sound like a control freak.
 
healother said:
UPDATE:

Confirmed, this girl is a skank. i talked to her this morning online and then on the phone. apparently last night she was absolutely trashed at a party with lots of single guys, who were all macking on her. she made out with a few dudes, and one guy she let him fuck her, without a condum. she said he was a virgin. she said she barely remembers any of it though.

she doesnt even remember calling me last night and telling me not to come.

granted i let a girl put her hand in my pants at the club, but at least i didnt have unprotected sex with a stranger.

wow this is just fucked up.
.
Click to expand...
After this post do you really think I am being sarcastic? Come on dude, I wouldnt steer you wrong.
 
superdave said:
After this post do you really think I am being sarcastic? Come on dude, I wouldnt steer you wrong.
Click to expand...

it sucks having to move on. i just want to find a girl to do stuff with, but something definately tells me this girl is the wrong one.

so are there women that will be kind, and stop making out and having sex with random dudes after she meets a guy she is interested in and gives him her number?

I dont want to go on a date with a woman knowing that later she is going to go to a party and get fucked, when all she gave me was a goodnight kiss on the doorstep

thats cheating as far as im concerned. and if u dont want to call it that, its still disrespectful.
 
biteme said:
Do you own that place? I've been there with friends in the past.
Click to expand...

THIS IS GOM CAUSE BM IS SIGNED ON TO HER LAPTOP

As much as I have spent there I should. I actually tried to buy the Men's Club Group a couple years ago. They declined Dallas has Laura Miller so no more titty bars opened or transfered.

My wife and I visit once in a blue moon to see some of my old girlies there. They love her but aren't too happy about no more rent, car payments, call phone bills etc etc.. BM couldn't care less she gets all my lunch money

:santa:
 
healother said:
UPDATE:

Confirmed, this girl is a skank. i talked to her this morning online and then on the phone. apparently last night she was absolutely trashed at a party with lots of single guys, who were all macking on her. she made out with a few dudes, and one guy she let him fuck her, without a condum. she said he was a virgin. she said she barely remembers any of it though.

she doesnt even remember calling me last night and telling me not to come.

granted i let a girl put her hand in my pants at the club, but at least i didnt have unprotected sex with a stranger.

wow this is just fucked up.



how easy? are you being sarcastic or serious?

anyways though, after hearing about her slut fest last night, it seems pretty easy to drop her.



yeah, i would have said "dont pick him up" but i didnt want to sound like a control freak.
Click to expand...
dude. control freak? there is nothing wrong with taking control. you shoulda sank his battleship with a cockblock.
 
HumanTarget said:
dude. control freak? there is nothing wrong with taking control. you shoulda sank his battleship with a cockblock.
Click to expand...

this dude had a boyfriend. but his friend who fucked her was single :mad:

anyways, she was going to go to that party regardless. uggh.
 
Brother that girl is obviously just a dumb slut. Move on. Plus you won't have the added obvious immense risk of a nasty disease from a girl who just had unprotected sex with a total stranger and has probably done it many times in the past. It's not like girls just do that out of the blue. Although I'm willing to bet if you called her a dumb slut and challenged her she would bang you. Sounds like the type of girl to sleep with any dominant male with some game.

Now that your confidence is going up you have to develop confidence enough to know without a shadow of a doubt that next time you go out, another girl will be interested. And another, and so on. And make sure you have enough confidence to know what you will accept as behaviour and what you won't without sacrificing your own feelings. Remember you're doing this journey for yourself and nobody else.
 
all this hard work Stevie and you're still the biggest social retard I've ever heard of.. and I've been working with IT dorks for the last 8 years so that's quite an achievement.

so are there women that will be kind, and stop making out and having sex with random dudes after she meets a guy she is interested in and gives him her number?
Click to expand...

a club skank gave you a sniff of it and you think you can turn her into mother theresa? on the surface it sounds like you're pathetically trying to wring something out of nothing but I suspect underneath it you're developing a savior complex, thinking you can fix these fallen women and turn them into good little wifey material. Next thing you'll be going to strip clubs to try to find 'the one'. Fucks sake, grow a pair.

here's what you need to do. Stop trying to be someone you're clearly not cut out to be. Stop going to clubs. stop doing this stuff you know deep down is wrong, because you're not going to find the kind of person you want there. What nice christian girl would want a guy who goes out, gets drunk and grinds on random women on the dancefloor, and you're only a couple of bad decisions away from doing lines and X.

join a e-dating site for christians and find yourself another virgin to grow old with.
 
healother said:
it sucks having to move on. i just want to find a girl to do stuff with, but something definately tells me this girl is the wrong one.

so are there women that will be kind, and stop making out and having sex with random dudes after she meets a guy she is interested in and gives him her number?

I dont want to go on a date with a woman knowing that later she is going to go to a party and get fucked, when all she gave me was a goodnight kiss on the doorstep

thats cheating as far as im concerned. and if u dont want to call it that, its still disrespectful.
Click to expand...
Yes there are women who hold the same value of certain acts as you do, but you have to remember that at their age its tough to restrain when lots of guys throw themselves at her. You are going to have to learn to compartmentalize things and cut girls off when necessary without looking back. Make sure that sort of thing doesnt interfer with your confidence or attitude with other new women. If you act like the kind of guy that offers excitement and fun and unpredictability then she will more than likely not screw around. But always look for the signs no matter how long youve been involved with someone because you never know when you are going to have to flip the switch and drop her without looking back. I wish this whole thing could be picnics and flowers and massages and no one gets burned but thats not how it will be sometimes.
 
ponyfitness said:
Brother that girl is obviously just a dumb slut. Move on. Plus you won't have the added obvious immense risk of a nasty disease from a girl who just had unprotected sex with a total stranger and has probably done it many times in the past. It's not like girls just do that out of the blue. Although I'm willing to bet if you called her a dumb slut and challenged her she would bang you. Sounds like the type of girl to sleep with any dominant male with some game.

Now that your confidence is going up you have to develop confidence enough to know without a shadow of a doubt that next time you go out, another girl will be interested. And another, and so on. And make sure you have enough confidence to know what you will accept as behaviour and what you won't without sacrificing your own feelings. Remember you're doing this journey for yourself and nobody else.
Click to expand...


that is some good advice. this woman is a slut, and i would at least ask for her to get a std test before sticking my unit in her. i also dont think its worth putting much effort into her, unless she can lead me to her hot friends, or put out for me.

having the knowledge that you can pickup a woman anytime anywhere is power. when you have that power and confidence a single woman cannot take it away from you. you have options, and backup plans, if one woman fails you, you get another. i dont know how far off that date is, where i will be that confident, but when it happens, pussy is going to fall like rain in a tropical forest.

i want to become so good at attracting women, that i feel as confident at my game as she feels about hers. I want to be able to get laid just as often as she can. because if she knows im able to do that, then her advantage is gone, because we both have an equal amount of power.

Tweakle said:
all this hard work Stevie and you're still the biggest social retard I've ever heard of.. and I've been working with IT dorks for the last 8 years so that's quite an achievement.



a club skank gave you a sniff of it and you think you can turn her into mother theresa? on the surface it sounds like you're pathetically trying to wring something out of nothing but I suspect underneath it you're developing a savior complex, thinking you can fix these fallen women and turn them into good little wifey material. Next thing you'll be going to strip clubs to try to find 'the one'. Fucks sake, grow a pair.

here's what you need to do. Stop trying to be someone you're clearly not cut out to be. Stop going to clubs. stop doing this stuff you know deep down is wrong, because you're not going to find the kind of person you want there. What nice christian girl would want a guy who goes out, gets drunk and grinds on random women on the dancefloor, and you're only a couple of bad decisions away from doing lines and X.

join a e-dating site for christians and find yourself another virgin to grow old with.
Click to expand...

i dont think its a savior complex, i think i just get attached to things and need to learn to not do that.

but you telling me i should be only going for a wife isnt fair. if other men and women can find boyfriends and girlfriends, then i should be able to too. i agree the club is a bad place to pickup women, its only for practicing approaches and a little excitement.

a christian girl will want me, because i know christian girls who do the same things that i do, and we are all in the same boat here.

I wouldnt want to date a girl and have there be no sex involved at all. and why would i want to grow old with the first woman i meet? Why would i even make that my goal? Why not just try to have a girlfriend that i genuinely like? i dont need to marry her, a several month or several year relationship would be fine.

superdave said:
Yes there are women who hold the same value of certain acts as you do, but you have to remember that at their age its tough to restrain when lots of guys throw themselves at her. You are going to have to learn to compartmentalize things and cut girls off when necessary without looking back. Make sure that sort of thing doesnt interfer with your confidence or attitude with other new women. If you act like the kind of guy that offers excitement and fun and unpredictability then she will more than likely not screw around. But always look for the signs no matter how long youve been involved with someone because you never know when you are going to have to flip the switch and drop her without looking back. I wish this whole thing could be picnics and flowers and massages and no one gets burned but thats not how it will be sometimes.
Click to expand...

i think you got it down pretty well. women are too desirable at my age. so in order to compensate i need to make myself more desirable and have just as many options as they do.

I agree that i need to compartmentalize and detach myself better. i havent learned the best procedure for doing that yet. i feel like you need to remain detached while talking to them if you want to attract them.

but yeah, there are no picnics. there is no security. if you meet someone who is serious about marriage, that can help, but there are no guarantees!
 
healother said:
it sucks having to move on. i just want to find a girl to do stuff with, but something definately tells me this girl is the wrong one.

so are there women that will be kind, and stop making out and having sex with random dudes after she meets a guy she is interested in and gives him her number?
Click to expand...

yea, but she wont be at the club jackin you off on the dancefloor
 
nimbus said:
yea, but she wont be at the club jackin you off on the dancefloor
Click to expand...

yeah, once i feel confident about my ability to score women in the club, im going to try to score women elseware. clubs and bars are very social environments with less barriers (the alcohol helps) so they are a good place for beginners. But the grocery store, or the mall, those take some nerve and are more advanced.

some may mention church activities, but the kind of woman you meet at an after church potluck may likely be the type that wouldnt put out at all, maybe a kiss once u 2 are engaged.
 
healother said:
some may mention church activities, but the kind of woman you meet at an after church potluck may likely be the type that wouldnt put out at all, maybe a kiss once u 2 are engaged.
Click to expand...

nah i bet she'd at least blow you once you put a ring on her finger
 
excellent this is a good development

keep in touch with her. her sexual choices are none of your business. youre going to stay in touch and have a female friend in your life that you arent going to have sex with. you get to chat, learn a bit about how women think, and have a girl hanging off you everytime you go out so that other girls see that you have girls and are more attracted to you as a result.

everyone flaming steve tell me when you last went out alone. going out without any friends puts you under a lot more social pressure, and unless you do it regularly, STFU

(i went out for about a month straight alone when i first got down here. i now have oodles of people in my phone wanting my company everyday, so i get to talk :) )
 
GoldenDelicious said:
excellent this is a good development


everyone flaming steve tell me when you last went out alone. going out without any friends puts you under a lot more social pressure, and unless you do it regularly, STFU
Click to expand...

true
but pressure depends.
personally the times i went out alone i've had a blast (usually because someone flaked or was too drunk to find the place). Always ended up meeting really cool people, alot of girls, and end up having a blast.
I always manage to make friends with some dudes and have them introduce me to their girls (which half the time are only friends). I act cool and friendly, buy you a drink and you present me your associate poon...nice tradeoff :)

i think friends can actually be social hinderances(especially when you're more social than your friends)..of course this was much easier at places where i already knew the bartenders and other people who worked there.
 
calveless wonder said:
true
but pressure depends.
personally the times i went out alone i've had a blast (usually because someone flaked or was too drunk to find the place). Always ended up meeting really cool people, alot of girls, and end up having a blast.
I always manage to make friends with some dudes and have them introduce me to their girls (which half the time are only friends). I act cool and friendly, buy you a drink and you present me your associate poon...nice tradeoff :)

i think friends can actually be social hinderances(especially when you're more social than your friends)..of course this was much easier at places where i already knew the bartenders and other people who worked there.
Click to expand...
i completely agree they can make life difficult, but youre confusing social pressure with ability to socialise and pickup overall

pros of going out with friends:
-slight social proof
-comfort bubble
-reality bubble
-multiple player scenarios ie silk glove iron fist
-obstacle management
-socal group overlaps
-no time constraints in order to socialise

cons of going out with friends:
-you need to associate/align IMMEDIATELY or risk negative proof
-no comfort bubble, far higher emotional stress
-the only reality you have to immerse others in is your own
-youre solo, and must negotiate telegraphing too much interest
-obstacles more problematic
-isolation more problematic
-all social interactions are your own

depending on your personality type, style, target girl, venue, evergy level bla bla bla, one or the other of the above may be favorable

i have a friend who never approaches. NEVER. he relies on proof, is never alone, piggybacking social circles etc to access the girls he wants. on the flip side, i have a buddy who is the biggest approach machine alive and goes out alone constantly.

personally, i think its easier just being an alcoholic :D

1 drink and golden is humming kumbaya watching everyone approach, giving tips
2 drinks and golden is humming kumbaya watching everyone approach giving tips
3 drinks and golden is humming kumbaya watching everyone approach giving tips
4 drinks and golden is humming kumbaya watching everyone approach giving tips
5 drinks and golden is bopping to kumbaya in his head, ignoring everyone approaching
6 drinks and golden asks the girl next to him the words to fucking kumbaya, and while she thinks about it, smooches her

everyone looks at golden like he grew 6 horns.

"what? what are you mofos looking at?"
 
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