Men-tal Anxiety. . . Men-opause. . . Men-tal Breakdown
Ever noticed that all problems start with MEN?

If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?

Q: What's the best way to kill a man?
A: Put a pretty blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one.

Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

Q: What is the difference between men and women:....
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need...A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg ?
A. They don't stop for directions.

Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving HER money, furs and diamonds.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

Q: Why do men masturbate?
A: It's sex with someone they love.

Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A: So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.

Q: How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
A: Nobody knows, it hasn't happened yet.

Like it or NOT ... These are "The Rules"

1. The Female always makes THE RULES.

2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.

3. No Male can possibly know all THE RULES.

4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.

5. The Female is never wrong.

6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is a misunderstanding because of something the Male did or said wrong.

7. If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.

8. The Female can change her mind at any time.

9. The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of The Female.

10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.

11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.

12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.

13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.

14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.

15. If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.

16. If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.

17. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm.

18. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.

19. Every house belongs to the oldest female living there.

Oh, I'm dyin' here!

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

I deserved that one....Heh heh heh....Good stuff Darl'in....Touche'

I didn't know they made toilet sets!

#1, the beer, cause I can get any blond!

And I STILL hump women's legs at parties....

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LAte

Make them stop Mommy!!!!!!!

Ranger

he he he he

C'mon your a big boy Ranger...no pouting now.

But the men lay the foundations.

ha ha ha ha ha