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"I'm just a Prisoner--in a Kings disguise"

All in all as an adult I have had 4 fights, 3 were over before they started, my fist, there face, the floor..that was it. All were in college while I played football and they were guys who just wanted to beat up a football player because we just were not tuff without pads... Funny shit!

The fourth really wasn't a fight just a drunk kid trying to hit on my wife one new years eve. I picked him up out of my chair by his arm pits and carried him to the door and handed him to the bouncer and told the bouncer that I would appreciate him taking care of him since I was on a date with my wife. Frickin kid was shell shocked that his ass was being carried out... he he

GOD I LOVE PUMPING IRON!!!

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"Shine So Vibrantly That You Must Squint to Catch a Glimpse"

they know better...

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"Pain, is just weakness leaving your body"

"...damn you for not giving my TEST" - Metallica

"After this show i'll be fat and happy again.....If i make it to the show...." - Lee Priest

"Lets put some weight on the bar.." - Shawn Ray

"IT DOESN'T MATTER" - The Rock

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"I'm just a Prisoner--in a Kings disguise"

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Weights before dates

Bros before Hos

It's really sad and a waste of human life.

One thing I love about being 40,is that no matter what, I have learned the patience to ignore and pity those who posture as a "badass".

Now, I realize that there are always going to be the idiots that deserve to get their asses kicked from here to eternity,but try to
always treat people in a way that you would want them to treat you. The only true way to destroy an enemy is to make them your friend.

Be careful of what you do, it only takes a second to end what took years to develop.

I'm down with Hav - been doing my Billy tapes and watchin old Bruce Lee flicks - you wanna go.

It took me three months to chase him down. I caught him in the parking lot of a softball field, after "servicing" his car, he had two friends with him and was big on talking shit about what the three of them were going to do to me once he saw I had him cornered. By that time, I didn't care my response was "do you want to do it one at a time or all three at one time?" While one of his friends was there in the middle of a Hee Haw laugh attack, I smashed that nose and put the wind out of his lungs with a knee in the gut, the other one just looked and said "hey man, I ain't no part of this." Then he ran off. Smart for him, a few minutes later that scum bag I had hunted was going through Happiness Withdrawal Symptoms. A broken leg and five missing teeth was the outcome. To this day, I really can't say what I enjoyed more, after beating his ass, whether it was repeatly slamming my fist into his leg until it broke or when he was holding his leg laying on the ground and I put my Doc Martin on his mouth and stepped down. Those teeth sounded like .22 rifle shots as the were forced back in his throat by the roots. They popped out like corn kernnels in a popping machine when they imploded inside his mouth. The result today is five false teeth on the top, and a steel rod in the leg that causes him to limp each and hurt on the days when it gets cold.

He is 25 now. Even though he is not married to my child's mother, I have never had a problem out of him again, it was all Yes Sir and No Sir after that night. He will think again of trying that shit with someone else's child again.

"A lesson well taught is a lesson well learned."

by the way Jae, bad ass story, did he press any charges?? I mean, If I got hunted down in a parking lot and lost five teeth and a healthy leg, I might consider involving the authorities. He had it coming though, good job.

Ok so its 3 in the morning at some costume party I went to. All of the sudden, in the background I hear "YOU WANT SOME MUTHA FUCKA, LETS GO BITCH!!!" or some shit like that.

It turns out, about 20 of the most ghetto white guys were trying to fight, basically everyone. You would not believe these guys, its hard not to laugh when you see some 120 pound eminem wife beater wearing shithead talking like he just came from compton. At one point asked one of them to translate because all I heard was "FUCK DAT BITCH, YOU FUCKIN WIT MY NIGGAS, DEN YOU FUCKIN WIT ME FOO" keep in mind these were all white guys.

Anyways, because my costume was showing alot of skin, none of them talked shit directly to me, it was pretty funny, at one point I was right in front of all 20 of them and they were yelling over my shoulder.

Ok so all of the sudden, some eminen throws a right cross at one of my friends on the Rugby team, (it was a rugby party, probably not the best place to start a fight), so after he hits my friend, all 30 or 40 of us proceded to destroy the 20 of them.

I never got touced, but I did put a dent in some little jive talking punk, felt pretty good, they were still talking shit as they were running away.

If I ever got into a fight that had ment something I would have most likely killed them. As soon as someone touches a friend there's no holding back.

You can say anything to me and I will just walk away, you can even knock me to the floor and I will run away, because it has no meaning except to look good in front of your friends.

Went to a TKE party at JMU...

Three of my friends were leaving, and they parked behind the house in an apatment complex parking lot. Just turns out that the SAE house is there, and a couple of the frat bros started mouthing off. No big deal, but when my friends got into their car the SAE bros started throwing rocks. My friends were just going to leave, but got pissed off. They got out of the car (3) and walked to the door, knocked on it, and greeted the sorry piece of shit who opened it with four knuckles in the snot box. All in all, they took down/out 9 bros before one got nailed with a book in the eye, and the other got kicked in the jaw/broke it. My 3rd friend just danced around like a boxer jabbing and getting the fuck out of the way. All in all, it wasn't a good scene. They wrecked shop for a while, but numbers one.

http://www.elitefitness.com/ubb/Archives/Forum10/06-2000/000412.html

This has the wall in it -
http://www.elitefitness.com/ubb/Archives/Forum10/05-2000/000089.html

Another beat down that I watched take place that was absolutely horrendous occurred back in high school. I am from a Deep South country town. (read: RedNeck Capital) There was a gorgeous girl in high school that did not like all the white trash and she was dating a black basketball player. Now they had been dating for two years and everyone knew and thought things were cool. Anyway, Prom Time came around and this little band of redneck girls and their boyfriends and suck ass groupies who had parents in the school counsel managed to get this girl Jeannie banned from attending the prom with her black boyfriend. Hey this was the 90's right? What is so big about that. They let two gay guys go as each other's dates, but not an inter-racial couple. Not that I have anything against the gay guys, everyone should be able to take who they wanted. So anyhow we come up with a plan that Jeannie takes a white guy for her date (because the school officials said they would refuse to let her in the door with the black guy) and the black guy would take a black girl and when they got inside, they would swap and dance with one another. Worked good for about 15 minutes before the little rednecks caught on. They complained and Jeannie and her date, the black and his date was dragged outside and deposited. Then the little rednecks came outside to heckle them.

So in the spirit of Prom night, someone always gets a hotel room somewhere for a party. When those rednecks left about 10 of us followed the 22 (four cars) of them and found out where they were staying. Then everyone goes to the hardware store (you can imagine this 5 guys in tuxedos coming in and buying a water hose and black spray paint.) We get a water hose and cut it into pieces about 18inches and if you have ever been struck by a waterhose you know what I am getting at here. If you have not, never do. With a proper size piece that is firm yet flexible enough to bend slightly, you get the firmness to have the impact of striking someone with a stick, yet the flexibility to bend upon impact and drag across skin, peeling the skin off along with it.
We show up at their hotel room and go up, the bros crouch down along the hallway, I ring the bell, they look in the eye view thing and see I am white and open the door, the bros rush in and all hell break loose. 22 rednecks against 8 bros as me and Jeannie stood in the door and watched. Some tried to make a run for it, but I slammed the door and held it shut. About 15 minutes of yells go by, the curtains open and one of my friends motion for me to release the door, they come out and I look in, there are pieces of prom clothes all over the place, blood everywhere, 22 rednecks on the floor in pain, spray painted black in the face. It was almost sickening. Even the girls that were in that room were whipped and beaten without mercy. That Monday at school, those people looked like they jumped out of a moving train. And you know they rented their tuxes and prom dresses and ended up having to pay for them.