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 Can you all help me?
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| Author | Topic: Can you all help me? |
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FitKitty Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 16) |
posted June 27, 2000 09:31 PM
 
Hi Guys, I know I have not been on this board for very long and have not posted all that much but I was wondering if you guys could give me your opinion on a situation I am in. I dated a guy in college for two years whom I loved very very much but who had a very serious drinking and drug problem. He is smart and funny and kind and thoughtful but He ended up breaking up with me in a very hurtful manner and really broke my heart. For the next few years we were still in contact as we had many of the same friends and lived near by, went to the same places and stuff. Through these years, he hurt me very much by hooking up with other people in front of me, doing tons of coke, leaving my to deal with a pregnancy by myself,and generally treating me awfully. I am not one who would ever normally put up with anything like that from anyone but deep in my heart of hearts I knew that he was a good person, just someone who was in a lot of trouble. Two months ago, he checked himself into the Betty Ford Center and got himself clean and sober. He came to me and asked for forgivess and has really seen the error of his ways and has tried in good faith to restore what he has messed up. I have supported him through rehab he and I took a vacation in Arizona last week to just reconnect. It was wonderful and also really scary. We got along so well and he was so kind but I am so scared to trust him again. He is now in follow up to this rehab at Hazelton, is putting his life back together and I am very happy for him. We are trying to patch things up, and we are trying to get back together. I know he loves me very much but here is the thing... what are the chances of my putting my heart on the line and getting hurt again? Can people change? Would you ever trust someone who once hurt you really badly? Would the fact that they were drunk when they were mean and now are sober have any weight in your decision? He is a good person, I know this, but would you ever go out on a limb like this? I am scared. Thanks for whatever help you can give. Sadkitty IP: Logged |
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cowbell Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 343) |
posted June 27, 2000 10:53 PM
Well, maybe he is finally making a change in his life and if so that is great, I put a past girlfriend to whom I was suppose to marry through some stuff kinda like this but did not get her pregnant, but was pretty hard into parting and would hood up with other girls every chance that I got, and I love this girl to death. Anyway I have changed my ways but am always tempted to stray every chance I get and have since then but I think I have finally gotten past that part of my life and am very happy with the way my life is now, not really sure what to say on this damn message other than I know how you feel cause I put my old girlfriend through this same type of thing, if you truely care about him and he does you than maybe evrything will work out fine, but if he is just using you and using you cause he needs someone right now than I would say that he will eventually do it again, but I could, or maynot be wrong. Anyway if you need someone to talk to more about this bive me a Email and i will try to clear up what I am trying to say in this message. hope all works out for you one way or another.  IP: Logged |
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Bam-Bam Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 192) |
posted June 27, 2000 11:24 PM
Some people never know when to call it quits. IP: Logged |
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fitness-for-life !! Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 16) |
posted June 28, 2000 06:25 AM
Keep it simple for at least a year, its to early yet to know if he can maintain sobriety. The deeper you allow yourself to go the more pain you will go through if/when he relapses. GOOD LUCK IP: Logged |
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mightydog Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 258) |
posted June 28, 2000 08:19 AM
I don't see how any reasonable person would take him back. IP: Logged |
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