The best one ever involves one of my best friends. He and his then girlfriend decided that it was time to start having unprotected sex. So she insisted that they both go get tested for STD's. So my buddy goes to the clinic to get his test and they suggest the swab test as it is more reliable. For those who don't know what the swab test is they basically stick a long q-tip in your eurethra (pee-hole). So I am working at the gym when he comes and asks me to spot him. As I am following him over to the leg press I sort of notice he's walking a bit funny but then again he's doing legs so I don't think too much on it. When we get over there he only has four plates on each side which was pretty light for him so I ask what he needs the spot for. He says he'll tell me after his set. So he struggles a bit and looks like he's going to pass out. After the set he tells me about the test. Now being the true friend that I am I break out in hysterical laughter. Then I give him a power bar so he won't pass out. Next thing he's sitting there with this really pained look on his face, so I ask him what's wrong. He said he has to piss but is afraid to (more laughter). He finally goes to piss and I am sitting in the office when the big boss walk in. One of the other employees follows him in and asks what's wrong with our buddy because he's in the bathroom screaming (more laughter). When he comes in I make him tell the crew what's wrong (more laughter). He then says "where the hell has this bitch been that she thinks we need this then voices concern about being able to perform duties over the weekend. This is where I proceed to say "You know if I were you and my shit didn't work because of this, her tongue would be in my ass". Start hysterical laughter by whole group. Best part is our boss had broken ribs so he was laughing in between gasps of pain as was our swab tested friend.
It was good times working at the gym. Sorry to be long winded, and that no real STD was involved, he tested clean.
Cheers,
Scotsman