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New York Cock Exchange

Steroid_Virgin said:
Hmmm... IMO, you guys need a fucking hobby..:confused:

this shit is pasted from another site jackass...now go back to calling people anti-semetic and pasting shit you dont understand.
 
p0ink said:


this shit is pasted from another site jackass...now go back to calling people anti-semetic and pasting shit you dont understand.

Again, let me reiterate.. Get a hobby Oinker.. Lol.. that fat lady tore your a new ass.. Hahahahah

;)
 
MrLuva757 : hey there sexy 18/m/wit pics here
Doug Stanhope : I'm a 14/f/with pussy here!
MrLuva757 : u got a pic?
Doug Stanhope : Nope.
MrLuva757 wants to directly connect. MrLuva757 is now directly connected.
Doug Stanhope : You're too young anyway.
MrLuva757 : im bout to be 19
Doug Stanhope : Ya, but do you know how to fuck?
MrLuva757 : shit girl i know what to do wit my 10 inch tool
MrLuva757 : trust me i would make u have triple orgasms
Doug Stanhope : That doesn't mean you know how to cyber.
Doug Stanhope : What's the kinkiest thing you've done?
MrLuva757 : oh i do trust me
MrLuva757 : fucked in a canoe out on the lake
Doug Stanhope : BO-ring.
MrLuva757 : lol
MrLuva757 : well what about u?
Doug Stanhope : ver do a Tiajuana Ham Salad?
Doug Stanhope : Ever*
MrLuva757 : tell me bout it
Doug Stanhope : You get blind-folded, fill a guys hairy ass up with ham salad and eat it while he slowly evacuates his colon. Trick is to stop eating right before you get to the poop.
Doug Stanhope : Kinda tops fucking in a canoe, huh?
MrLuva757 : well all i wanna know now is when me and u gonna do that?
MrLuva757 : maybe
Doug Stanhope : What else are you into, besides boring summer campshit?
MrLuva757 : im into anything baby jus name it
Doug Stanhope : I'mlooking at your pics and, no offense, you look like a stone-coldfaggot.
Doug Stanhope : I mean, seriously.
MrLuva757 : which ones?
Doug Stanhope : The ones on this site in your profile.
Doug Stanhope : http://www.picpage.com/users/se/sexyrich757/index.php3
Doug Stanhope : You sure like hanging out with other dudes and flexing, huh?
MrLuva757 : chill on that
MrLuva757 : thats my best friend of 12 years
Doug Stanhope : Ya, you must be real close to spend that much time shirtless with a camera together.
MrLuva757 : dayum girl wha i do to u? lol
Doug Stanhope : I wish I was there to do both of you.
MrLuva757 : what would u do to me?
Doug Stanhope : But I'm afraid I'd have to stop every ten seconds to crowbar your cocks from one-anothers mouths.
MrLuva757 : lol
Doug Stanhope : I mean, no offense.
MrLuva757 : naw chill my cock would be in your tight pussy
MrLuva757 direct connection is closed.
Doug Stanhope : Mmmmmm.
Doug Stanhope : My pussy is like wet velvet.
Doug Stanhope : My pussy is like wet velvet.
Doug Stanhope : I said that already.
MrLuva757 : my cock is rock hard
MrLuva757 wants to directly connect. Doug Stanhope .
Doug Stanhope : Thatnks, but I have seen you're pics already.
MrLuva757 : u got a mic?
Doug Stanhope : Trust me, I'll be hornier without them.
Doug Stanhope : No, mic.
MrLuva757 : i got one i can talk to u on it and u type
Doug Stanhope : Let's just type. If I heard your voice and you sounded as faggy as you look, I'd get all soft.
MrLuva757 : trust me baby i sound sexy
Doug Stanhope : Tell me something kinky you want to try.
MrLuva757 : and i look sexy 2 those were bad pics
Doug Stanhope : Bad pics? You mean the camera made you look like a truck stop queer, shirtless with bleached hair?
MrLuva757 : lol
MrLuva757 : can u hear me?
Doug Stanhope : My gooness, you sound dumb as a stick. Turn off the mic or I'll dry up like sand.
Doug Stanhope : goodness*
MrLuva757 : dayum girl u are harsh
Doug Stanhope : Now lets cyber, I'm done with the stupid shit. If I don't come soon I'll go sterile.
MrLuva757 : aiight baby lets do it then
Doug Stanhope : Tell me something kinky you want to try and don't say "Whatever you want".
MrLuva757 : well first i want u to tie me up completely
Doug Stanhope : Mmmmm.
Doug Stanhope : Yes.
Doug Stanhope : Where are we?
MrLuva757 : at the park at night
MrLuva757 : u tie me up butt naked to the bench
Doug Stanhope : Oooooh, the park. Where homos cruise, coincidently.
MrLuva757 : lol
Doug Stanhope : Ok., I tie you to the bench, you are stripped naked, chest down on the seat, ass exposed to me.
Doug Stanhope : I stand over you with a bamboo cane.
MrLuva757 : mmmmm i like rough
MrLuva757 : so what u plannin on doing with that cane?
Doug Stanhope : Your feet are two foot apart and both caught in bear traps, testicles dangling in the cool night air like a wilted bee's nest.
Doug Stanhope : Your hands are tied out at your sides like a backwards Christ figure and you await your punishment with an erection that could bust a windshield.
MrLuva757 : cool breeze is makin my cock get rock hard
Doug Stanhope : Tell me your sins, child, or you will feel the great anger of my staff.
MrLuva757 : and what if i dont want to tell u my sins
Doug Stanhope : Then you will feel great punishment.
MrLuva757 : oh im scared frightened with a huge hard on
Doug Stanhope : Then confess.
MrLuva757 : i confess i want u to hit me with that stick
Doug Stanhope : *brings down the stick across the back of your thigh. The tip breaks and hits your testicle, tearing open your bag.*
Doug Stanhope : Now confess to me.
MrLuva757 : ughhhh yes is that all u got?
Doug Stanhope : I take the broken tip of the cane and use it to pry apart your ass cheeks.
Doug Stanhope : Are you thirsty?
MrLuva757 : yes
Doug Stanhope : Beg me for a drink.
MrLuva757 : please give me a drink baby im dieing of thirst please give me a drink
Doug Stanhope : I rustle the bushes near us with my cane. Two park-homos scurry out.
Doug Stanhope : I corral one of them and direct him to piss in your mouth.
MrLuva757 : lol
Doug Stanhope : You drink like a dying man in a Bangkok prison.
Doug Stanhope : Now confess tome.
Doug Stanhope : to me*
MrLuva757 : i confess i want you to untie me and ride me like a clydesdale horse
Doug Stanhope : I will ride you while you are still tied, thank you.
MrLuva757 : yes mam
Doug Stanhope : I reach between your legs and jack you off like I am milking a dog.
MrLuva757 : mmmmmm
Doug Stanhope : You start to quiver, so I take the cane down upon your ass with the might of a Gladiator.
MrLuva757 : ugh yes baby
Doug Stanhope : Your ass-flesh splits open, blood leaking from you, raw flesh exposed to the night air.
MrLuva757 : i love it
Doug Stanhope : Your ass is still pryed open with the bamboo tip.
Doug Stanhope : As i begin to lube up my own cock for the procedure, your shirtless homo friend appears with an erection himself.
Doug Stanhope : We flip a coin, he gets mouth, I get ass.
Doug Stanhope : We begin to tool you as you gag and cry Mother Mary.
MrLuva757 : aiight this is wack now
Doug Stanhope : But, alas, it is you who will be the *Mary* tonite!
MrLuva757 : im not a fag
Doug Stanhope : Oh, ok. My bad.
Doug Stanhope : Then lets say you friend just sits down beside you to wait for a bus.
MrLuva757 : i want u to suck my big dick right now
Doug Stanhope : I stroke your manhood with my little 14 yr old girl fingers, tickling your torn-open bag and pushing the testicle back inside.
Doug Stanhope : Your shirtless homo friend waits patiently beside you, smoking a cigarette which he occasionally ashes in your gaping colon.
Doug Stanhope : Finally his bus comes.
Doug Stanhope : When the doors spring open, the bus, loaded with AIDS patients, unloads and begins raping you like you were a free happy-hour buffet.
Doug Stanhope : You squeal in ecstasy as your ass drinks up death-cum like a cactus.
Doug Stanhope : (I need some feedback so I can come too, you know)
 
dgreenhill said:
Poink I will hook you up the next time I reload.. this was the funniest stuff I have read in a long, long time.. :D

when i first read these, i had just eaten, and i seriously almost fucking puked i was laughing so hard
 
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