Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below its a long story, but my gf of 4 years has been upset about her weight and thus very unhappy with her body. dealing with her issue is a whole nother thing which i dont want to get into really in this thread at the moment. i just need some help. because of her unhappiness with her body, we have sex maybe once every 5 months, which is really hard for me. ive become recently friends with a girl i work with who is kinda flirty with me at work, but she knows i have a gf and knows i wouldnt ever cheat on her. this girl (who is incredibly attractive) has told me that she had a sex dream about me one day at work, so here and there we tease and joke about that, but its always friendly and doesnt cross the line. last nite after work we were sitting there talking and i was tellin her about my problems and things, so before i left she gave me her number saying that if i ever need to talk to someone to call her. today she texted me just asking how im feeling today and normal friendly stuff basically. then she started joking sayin shes gettin in the tub and that i should come by. so, feeling sexually frustrated from having sex twice a year roughly, i started to mess around back saying flirty stuff. eventually i brought up that if i were single id say a lot more but i cant now. we said some sexual things but nothing in stone that i was actually ever going to do anything with her, just teasing around. for some reason though, i feel extremely guilty that i texted flirty things to her behind my gf's back, and because of the guilt i took a massive amount of painkillers to numb myself out to the point that i thought i was going to nod off completely (yes i have a drug problem, but thats a whole nother thing as well.) all im asking is, given my situation of being deprived of sexual activity for so long and only watching porn, how guilty should i feel? i hate myself for it but i feel so alone anymore. im sorry this was so long but i needed to explain everything./ please respond it would be greatly appreciated. thanks guys.
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extreme guilt
- Thread starter markshark
- Start date
i would definately talk to your gf and maybe consider a sex therapist. also, dont be fucking stupid and text anything again. not for the guilt factor, but simply because now its proof. the guilt thing is rough. i am not a cheater and am married. i would feel guilty but what she doesnt know wont hurt her. this, if you tell her, would do nothing but cost you crazy headaches. deal with it. deal with the drug issue too. thats not good. therapy all around for you. may sound stupid, but a 3rd party can point out what the problems may be. dont beat yourself up over texts though. thats silly. youre human and you are in a precarious situation. either she needs to help herself and you, or it may be time to reassess your situation. watch for the whore at work, sounds like someone who would intentionally fuck you over. dont be dumb.
captainahole
New member
You have to get her to deal with it or it will never get any better trust me Ive been there. Yes I can understand the guilt but it will go farther if you don't get her to deal with it.
Underwraps
New member
No sex is not healthy. Get help. She's selfish to withhold b/c of her insecurities. I am assuming you have told her how beautiful, sexy, attractive you think she is and how much you just enjoy looking at her w/o even touching yadda yadda. Work it man!
If you're adding to her insecurity like telling her certain clothes make her ass look bigger or that she should not fix her hair a certain way then you get what you deal out. Don't tell her her coochie or her hair smells. Just say how nice it would be to do something after a hot shower together or something. Yes, my spouse would say all this kind of crap to me. They just went on the list of 100 reasons why I cheated on him and now I am living with guilt. But, you can nip this in the bud. Like they said, get her help and boost her ego as much as possible. I'm still in the fixing things process so I'm really not one to preach. But, I think there's many underlying issues here, there usually is. Really get to the bottom of things. You are not a room mate/friend. You are suppose to be romantic lovers.
believe me i do nothing but tell her how beautiful and perfect she is and anything to boost her self esteem. i buy her flowers, surprise her with candles and rose pedals, make her dinner, etc. etc.
DJ_UFO
Banned
Hey man, I don't remember you posting this before but How old are you? You do not psychologically behave like a grown man. You have posted some psychopathic stuff before, but if you keep going with the same mental instability, that tells something different. The only thing that I can advice you, is the first step for everything, and is the same stupidity all humans fall for: Emotions. Put down your emotions and learn to use reason. Humans like you, base their daily life on what they want/like. Wrong. That is not how you organize your life. Forget about what you like or what you want, start thinking about what is convenient and necessary. IF YOU DO NOT learn to fix this in your mind, you will FOR SURE end up killing yourself, or sleeping under a bridge forever.
Now man up and make decisions. Regrets are for kids.
Now man up and make decisions. Regrets are for kids.
if she has body image issues why not sex in the dark? sounds odd... I think this goes beyond that....
downunder hunter
New member
You sound whipped bro, god knows why if your girl doesnt want to have sex with you. There's plenty fish in the sea. If you cook your girl dinner bring her flowers etc and she cant show you any affection ditch her ass bro sounds like she is bringing you down and making you unhappy is she really worth it? Bang the hot bitch at work be a man! by the sounds of it you would be better off single. I hope you get some help and everything works out for you.
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