There's just some things you don't talk about in public!

[CipherLock]

Brodie Bruce: My cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a plane to New Mexico when all of a sudden the hydraulics went. The plane started spinning around, going out of control. So, he decides it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So, all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad. So, all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of a sudden the hydraulics kick back in and the plane rights itself. It lands safely and everyone puts their pieces or whatever, you know, away and de-board. Nobody mentions the phenomenon to anyone else.
Gil Hicks: Well, did he cum or what?
Brodie Bruce: Jesus Christ, man! There's just some things you don't talk about in public!

 

[CipherLock]

Gwen Turner: He tried to screw me somewhere very uncomfortable once.
T.S. Quint: What like the back of a Volkswagen?


Brodie Bruce: Lois could never have Superman's baby. Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm? I guarantee he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it's strong enough to carry his child?
T.S. Quint: Sure, why not?
Brodie Bruce: He's an alien for Christ sake! His kryptonian biological makeup is enhanced by Earth's yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan, the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom . . . that would kill them.


T.S. Quint: I was going to propose to her.
Brodie Bruce: Where?
T.S. Quint: Universal tour.
Brodie Bruce: You're kidding, what part?!
T.S. Quint: When Jaws pops out of the water.
Brodie Bruce: That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard.

 

[from zero]

THIS is what you do with your boredom?

 

[TheProject]

He spends a lot of time on imdb.com

 

[OMGWTFBBQ]

All that sounds familiar - my net connection is slow as shit, so I can't look it up.

WHAT IT BE?

 

[CipherLock]

nu uh. This movie was a prime piece of work though. Stink Palm.

 

[TheProject]

All that sounds familiar - my net connection is slow as shit, so I can't look it up.

WHAT IT BE?

Mallrats.

 

[chewyxrage]

Suitorette: "Would your kiss be like a soft breeze, a firm handshake, or a jackhammer?"


Gil Hicks: "Definately a jackhammer. I'm in there with some pressure, and when I'm finished your not the same, your're changed."

Brodie: "WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THIS SHIT?!?"

 

[CipherLock]

word