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napsgeargenezapharmateuticals domestic-supplypuritysourcelabsResearch Chemical SciencesUGFREAKeudomestic

stupid ass birthday party I went to. (stupid ass kid) (stupid ass parents)

AAP

Plat Hero
Platinum
Ok, before anyone starting complaining I am ragging on a 9 year old kid... you had to have been there.

So this fatso turns 9 yesterday. You look at him and you see someone raised on McDonalds and Nintendo. Big party, but only about 8-9 kids show up. I overheard one say "my mom made me come." So that tells you the little bastard didn't have any friends in the first place.

Now I thought he was being a little too bossy and greedy at first while the cake and ice cream was going, but hey, it was "his day".

So everything holds together until it comes time for the party games. Now the parents had promised prizes for each of the contest winners. They had the prizes wrapped up and on the table to hand out. Oh lord, I have never seen such a blatant cheater. And his parents are to blame as much as he. There was a crawl race. You know, who can crawl the fastest. The race starts and Fat Ass is in last place. What does he do? He jumps up on runs on two feet to the finish line. And his Dad declares him the winner. WTF? The rest of the kids are frozen in place on the grass on hands and knees looking up there with a look of "this isn't happening" on their faces. Ok, nothing wrong, cause he ain't gonna win another contest right? He opens the present. It is an Xbox game. "Wow. Just what I have been wanting. Wow."

Next game. Pin the tail on the donkey. Everyone goes and he is last. His turn comes and they spin him around, point him at the picture and he walks up, holds his head back, lifts up the blindfold with one hand and squarely sticks the tail right where it is suppose to go. Despite cheating in front of everyone, he is still therefore, the winner. One mother looks around in disbelief. She goes "what the fuck was THAT all about?" Fat Ass Moms issues this lady a stern "SHHHH!!" That lady looks at us and goes "oh no she didn't. She didnt' just do that." Fat Ass gets the prize... another "WOW! Just what I have been wanting... WOW"!!

It was utterly amazing that all the prizes for the "winners" were things he had asked for himself.

Third game. Dart Throw. The balloons had little tags on the back of them. If you busted a balloon and if the tag had a star on it, you won the prize. Ok. Fat Ass goes FIRST. His dad immediately whispers to him. "that one right there. bust that one" Fat Ass being the moron he is and feels no shame in cheating turns around and asks in a normal voice "that one? the blue one over there? That is one with the star?" Ok... so he throws his three darts. And doesn't get it. I am like "whew, at least someone else may win this time" But NOOOOOOO! His Dad goes "in honor of your birthday, you get an extra dart." Fat ass misses. His Dad glances around and stammers "and here is a present from your mom and I, an extra dart". he busts the balloon that time. And it is the red star one. the rest of the kids decide not to even play at that point. Another "WOw... just what I wanted... WOW!!"

There is one more game to play (I can't remember what it was) but obviously it was going to favor him. This was the last game and therefore the "grand prize". One little girl said "I don't want play these games. They are rigged worse than the carnival." All the other children say the same. One mother goes "Why don't you all decide on a game to play yourself. Everyone vote on it."

They picked arm wrestling. And in order to discourage cheating, they said up front, one arm only or you are disqualified. Forever. It was the FOREVER part that cracked me up. Hearing 7-8 children say that word all at the same time...

So.... (can you believe this?)...... the father of Fat Ass goes "ok, we are going to have an arm wrestling contest and the winner of this contest gets to arm wrestle the birthday boy for the grand prize." Fat Ass was looking around with a pout on his face because apparently the only person he had a chance to beat in arm wrestling was a little 6 year old girl. And she wasn't going to play at all with a cheater. (she said) So...... guess who joins the arm wrestling match at the end? The father. He wins and then he has to arm wrestle Fat Ass for the grand prize. He purposely lets Fat Ass wins. Another "WOW......just what I wanted... WOW!!"

At this point parents are rounding up their kids to go home. And one of the boys there goes... "man, he is so like going to have it coming at school tomorrow." The mom that was given the stern shhhhh looks at the other parents and children and goes "why don't WE go to Pizza Hut. You know, just US. The losers"

But seriously, this kid is going to grow up fucked up in the head because of his parents. He will never handle adversity or hardship. And his parents were as bad as anything. They did not care that the cheating was so shockingly apparent and everytime he "won" they both cheered like he just won the gold medal in the Olympics.

Fat kids suck.
 
I'm shocked! Parents let you near their kids. A 30ish buffed out gay guy at a ice cream party. I would'nt have a problem cause your cute but others do? wow
 
Last edited:
The Nature Boy said:
I would like to see a movie re-enactment with bullit as the fat kid.


LMAO!

I bet he could pout like hell too.
 
LMAO.

I went to this very same birthday party when I was about 9 years old.. LOL.. I was one of the "friends" that never won.. and the birthday boy won EVERY GAME!!! We had a "musical chairs" where conveniently daddy was stopping the music when son was closest to the chair.. And there was 3 or 4 different games.

Even at that age I was like.. this is messed up. :rolleyes:
 
He was probably an only child.I would have had my twin boys's that are nine years old beat his ass right before we left.:D
 
I have to admit that AAP has way more friends that are under 13 than I do.

Not to brag or anything, but I could have beat that kid in the crawl race even if he did cheat. And then I would have taunted his fat ass afterwards.
And I don't even fucking have an XBox.
 
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