Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below 
.jpg "Research Chemical Sciences")
.png "Research Chemical Sciences")
The Almighty
New member
I bet many of you didnt believe me. I was a man on a mission. Actually, I was bored at work so I decided to give NYC BOY a call on the number listed at musclebomb.com. I had heard that it cost a little something per phone call...but I was not 100% sure that was true.
To my shock and surprise, they offer the first 3 minutes of the phone call for free. So, I decided to capitalize on the situation.
The first attempt to speak with him, the recorded voice said he was unavailable at the time. However, when I called back about one hour later......
I now know why he has shitty grammar skills...it is obvious from his accent that he is either foreign (European perhaps) or simply mentally challenged. Neither would have surprised me.
Recorded here is the roughly four minute phone conversation I had with the Great One. I wanted to stop by the three minute grace period, but it was just too enlightening talking with such a recognized figure in the bodybuilding community.
Joe: Hi, this is Joe "Da Bomb" what is your name?
Me: Cock.
Joe: This is Carl?
Me: Yeah, Carl.
Joe: Hi Carl, this is Joe.
Me: Yeah, I know you told me.
Joe: So, what do you need to know, friend? You need help with your good body?
Me: Well, before I have to pay for this phone call...
Joe: (Interrupts me) Yes you have first minutes free!
Me: Yeah, I know. But before those minutes run out I want to know what your qualifications are.
Joe: What did you need for me?
Me: Well, it says on your musclebomb.com site that you are a personal trainer.
Joe: Yes, I train many people all over New York. That is where I live.
Me: Ok, well what company are you certified under?
Joe: What?
Me: What type of certification do you have?
Joe: I have for personal training people.
Me: Yeah, I know, but what company?
Joe: (giggling like a schoolgirl) Oh, Im sorry. It is called I.F.A.
Me: Never heard of that one.
Joe: Yes, I got it here in New York.
After I got home, I looked on the net and found that International Fitness Association is an actual certification company. However, the fact that you take the test on-line doesnt really say much for it's credability. Goto http://www.ifa.com/ if you wanna become a personal trainer by the way.
Me: So how many people do you train?
Joe: I train all over New York, where I live. I train over 100 people a year.
Me: 100?
Joe: Yes, over than that.
Me: So, each customer get's an average of 5 minutes with you per session?
Joe: What?
Me: Nevermind. So what can I do to get as big as you.
Joe: You need to be an animal!
Me: Perhaps you could be more specific?
Joe: You need to eat a lot, even protein all the time!
Me: Well, what if Im fat. Should I still eat a lot?
Joe: No, no, no, no. If you have fat then you need to do cardio every day!
Me: Well, I do run every day. What about my diet?
Joe: Stop eating all sugar.
Me: Ya, I figured that. What else?
Joe: Thats it. Then you will lose weight!
Me: Thats it?
Joe: Thats all you know. If you need to know at about more, then look on my site.
Me: What is the deal with your site anyway?
Joe: My site is the best on the internet!
Me: Really?
Joe: Yes. It is voted best.
Me: Really? By who?
Joe: All the sites on the net say mine is the best.
Me: Hmm. I looked there last night when I got this number to call, and it seems that only 5 or 6 people post there.
Joe: No, we have more than 100 members. It has a button to search the topics.
Me: Wow. Well, then why were people talking shit about your site on the posts then?
Joe: Oh. Those are punks from another boards who are jealous (jelus) of my site. But it's ok because I banned them and they stopped.
Me: I dont know, I think they may be on to something.
Joe: What? On my site?
Me: Well I think that maybe your site is a piece of shit.
Joe: Why, what is wrong with it?
Me: Well the site is cool I guess but you are a tool.
Joe: I'm a cool?
Me: No, you're a tool. That means that you are a gimp.
Joe: What are you meaning?
Me: I mean that it's obvious from your pictures that you plaster up everywhere and you worthless "advice" that you dont really know anything about bodybuilding, do you?
Joe: Hey, you are not a serious call, are you?
Me: How the fuck did you guess you pathetic piece of shit.
Joe: What?
Me: Shut up.
Joe: Why are you being a fucker over the phone? I banned you from my site already.
Me: Youre a loser.
Joe: Come to New York and where I live I will kick the shit out of you.
At this point, I figured why pay money to get yelled at by a mental patient over the phone, so I decided to hang up and save some cash.
Folks, dont think that this is the end of it. I have many more potentially boring work days ahead.
To my shock and surprise, they offer the first 3 minutes of the phone call for free. So, I decided to capitalize on the situation.
The first attempt to speak with him, the recorded voice said he was unavailable at the time. However, when I called back about one hour later......
I now know why he has shitty grammar skills...it is obvious from his accent that he is either foreign (European perhaps) or simply mentally challenged. Neither would have surprised me.
Recorded here is the roughly four minute phone conversation I had with the Great One. I wanted to stop by the three minute grace period, but it was just too enlightening talking with such a recognized figure in the bodybuilding community.
Joe: Hi, this is Joe "Da Bomb" what is your name?
Me: Cock.
Joe: This is Carl?
Me: Yeah, Carl.
Joe: Hi Carl, this is Joe.
Me: Yeah, I know you told me.
Joe: So, what do you need to know, friend? You need help with your good body?
Me: Well, before I have to pay for this phone call...
Joe: (Interrupts me) Yes you have first minutes free!
Me: Yeah, I know. But before those minutes run out I want to know what your qualifications are.
Joe: What did you need for me?
Me: Well, it says on your musclebomb.com site that you are a personal trainer.
Joe: Yes, I train many people all over New York. That is where I live.
Me: Ok, well what company are you certified under?
Joe: What?
Me: What type of certification do you have?
Joe: I have for personal training people.
Me: Yeah, I know, but what company?
Joe: (giggling like a schoolgirl) Oh, Im sorry. It is called I.F.A.
Me: Never heard of that one.
Joe: Yes, I got it here in New York.
After I got home, I looked on the net and found that International Fitness Association is an actual certification company. However, the fact that you take the test on-line doesnt really say much for it's credability. Goto http://www.ifa.com/ if you wanna become a personal trainer by the way.
Me: So how many people do you train?
Joe: I train all over New York, where I live. I train over 100 people a year.
Me: 100?
Joe: Yes, over than that.
Me: So, each customer get's an average of 5 minutes with you per session?
Joe: What?
Me: Nevermind. So what can I do to get as big as you.
Joe: You need to be an animal!
Me: Perhaps you could be more specific?
Joe: You need to eat a lot, even protein all the time!
Me: Well, what if Im fat. Should I still eat a lot?
Joe: No, no, no, no. If you have fat then you need to do cardio every day!
Me: Well, I do run every day. What about my diet?
Joe: Stop eating all sugar.
Me: Ya, I figured that. What else?
Joe: Thats it. Then you will lose weight!
Me: Thats it?
Joe: Thats all you know. If you need to know at about more, then look on my site.
Me: What is the deal with your site anyway?
Joe: My site is the best on the internet!
Me: Really?
Joe: Yes. It is voted best.
Me: Really? By who?
Joe: All the sites on the net say mine is the best.
Me: Hmm. I looked there last night when I got this number to call, and it seems that only 5 or 6 people post there.
Joe: No, we have more than 100 members. It has a button to search the topics.
Me: Wow. Well, then why were people talking shit about your site on the posts then?
Joe: Oh. Those are punks from another boards who are jealous (jelus) of my site. But it's ok because I banned them and they stopped.
Me: I dont know, I think they may be on to something.
Joe: What? On my site?
Me: Well I think that maybe your site is a piece of shit.
Joe: Why, what is wrong with it?
Me: Well the site is cool I guess but you are a tool.
Joe: I'm a cool?
Me: No, you're a tool. That means that you are a gimp.
Joe: What are you meaning?
Me: I mean that it's obvious from your pictures that you plaster up everywhere and you worthless "advice" that you dont really know anything about bodybuilding, do you?
Joe: Hey, you are not a serious call, are you?
Me: How the fuck did you guess you pathetic piece of shit.
Joe: What?
Me: Shut up.
Joe: Why are you being a fucker over the phone? I banned you from my site already.
Me: Youre a loser.
Joe: Come to New York and where I live I will kick the shit out of you.
At this point, I figured why pay money to get yelled at by a mental patient over the phone, so I decided to hang up and save some cash.
Folks, dont think that this is the end of it. I have many more potentially boring work days ahead.
