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I hate exams....and the kiwi, I hate that too

Nathan

New member
They both suck something huge and they suck it fierce. Don't even get me started about oral exams - and to save you assholes the trouble, if those were exams wherein you are graded on your oral sex skills, then yes I'd probably do very well provided my professor were a man. Jackasses. So, basically I stand there like a complete retard and get pummeled with questions to which I don't know the answers. Since my prof is standing right there it's impossible to come up with a bullshit answer, what with his eyes boring into my very soul and all. I should really start wearing crotchless pants to these things to distract my prof long enough to give myself a chance to come up with something. Man, I got smoked last year on an oral exam. I was asked what is inside a diode vacuum tube. Let's think about this one now. You really don't have to know jack shit about anything to answer this since they've already given you the answer. A diode VACUUM tube, i.e. there is nothing in it since it is a vacuum. However, the assholes asked me if there could be air inside it so they got me all trying to figure out why that might make sense and came off looking like a complete ass. Needless to say, I immediately began masturbating when things began turning awry in the hopes that it would detract from the fact that I was flustered and probably a little constipated. Can you be a LITTLE constipated? I suppose not. I guess it's one of those things that you are either are or you aren't. Kind of like having leprosy. You either do or you don't. I mean you can't exactly partially lose pieces of your body now can you? You're either falling to shit or you aren't. Anyways, long live freedom and all that other crap.
 
You didn't go into why you hate kiwis.....which I LOVE btw!!


Other than that...I agree, long live freedom and all that other crap.
 
PREPARE YOURSELF FOR HIS QUESTIONS AND YOU WILL NOT BE MADE A FOOL BY YOUR PROFESSOR.




KAYNE
 
If your oral exam answers are anything like your posts than I would thank jebus your still in school, your quite sporadic and jump everywhere. Your in a very small program I would think; individual oral exams would take a long long time to finish if you had a standardish largish class. But then again I am just guessing as I've never been orally propositioned by my male teachers. Also don’t be disrespecting the kiwis, they are a excellent source of vitamins c/a and potassium - the fact that they look like overgrown hairy testicles with infected green insides does not change the fact that they are nutritiously delicious.
 
I find it odd that everyone here assumed I was talking about the kiwi fruit, when in fact i was referring to the dastardly kiwi bird. Bastards that they are.

Anyways, yes, in realy my life my answers to ALL questions are sporadic and tend to inevitably end with something having to do with genitals. I am in astrophysics though and so genitals always fit into the answer in one way or another anyways so generally it all works out quite nicely. My oral exam is for general relativity which is actually a graduate level course I am taking - obviously I am an undergraduate student. Preparing is easier said than done. I will do my best but it's going to be a slaughter no matter how you slice it more than likely. Thanks for all the constructive criticism so far. Everyone but Polar can bite me.
 
IF YOU THINK THOSE ARE COOL, YOU OUGHT TO TRY THAT LITTLE PADDLE WITH THE BALL THAT IS CONNECTED TO IT BY A STRING. YOU'LL GET A KICK OUT OF THAT.




KAYNE
 
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