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For a laught...Stupid American laws.

bouncer

New member
STUPID AMERICAN LAWS
ARIZONA
You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
No more than six girls may live in any house.
An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
Hunting camels is prohibited.

CALIFORNIA
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
It is illegal in for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.
The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.
CONNECTICUT
You cannot buy any alcohol after 8pm or on Sundays.
Silly string is banned.
You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour
IDAHO
If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
Residents may not fish from a giraffe's back.
INDIANA
Oral sex is illegal.
A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
You may not back into a parking spot. Police officers cannot see your license plate.
Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.
KENTUCKY
It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
It is considered an offense for anyone to receive anal sex.
MASSACHUSSETS
Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
MAINE
You may not step out of a plane in flight.
Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
NEW MEXICO
It's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public
NEW YORK
Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
OHIO
It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
Anal intercourse is banned.
It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license!
Breast feeding is not allowed in public.
TENESSEE
Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
Driving is not to be done while asleep.
The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
UTAH
When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.
A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
Women may not swear.
Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.
WEST VIRGINIA
It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.
Roadkill may be taken home for supper.
Whistling underwater is prohibited.
It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps
 
Julez don't go to Wales on a sunday mate. Because it's legal to shoot an Englishman in Cardiff, only on a Sunday and only with a crossbow !

bouncer
 
bouncer said:
TENESSEE
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.

:lmao:....this is obviously an enlightened culture we are dealing with :D (J/k)

bouncer said:
Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.

:bawling:

now thats just mean
 
Last edited:
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
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LMAO!!! Hold on honey, let me get the dang flag...
 
i saw in a paper here a judge sentenced a man (who had called a policeman a pig) to stand by the corner of a road for 2 days with a 350lb sow and a sign that read 'this is not a police officer'

:D
 
bouncer said:
Julez don't go to Wales on a sunday mate. Because it's legal to shoot an Englishman in Cardiff, only on a Sunday and only with a crossbow !

bouncer

So, it's not just the sheep that have something to worry about.
 
bouncer said:
WEST VIRGINIA
It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.

Sorry...I'm responsible for that first one. DONT JUDGE ME!!!

Love me....Love my Gurnsey!
 
Cute Irish Jokes

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a truck. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised, " What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.

"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy.

"That little shit, O'Conner," says Sean, "He could'nt do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "A shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "You should have defended yourself, did'nt you have something in your hand?"

"That I did" says Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner's breast, and a thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

:D
 
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