A||||18||Fit||Hi bikinimom and everyone else!: I'm the "scarry shit"|||||| Z||000000||Fit||01-27-2001||02:25 AM||||Hi! I'm from another board but have been reading this one for awhile now. I couldn't help but do my first post after reading the post from bikinimom regarding the skinny woman and reading everyones replies.

I am 33 (34 in March) I have a 13yr old and a 2yr old.

When I was a little girl my mother took me to different doctors because I was so skinny. I looked like a walking stick. During my school years, I listened to others call me things like bean pole, walking stick, bonie maroni, etc etc..

Upon entering my puberty years, I watched as all the other girls grew breasts while mine stayed flat as a board. None of the guys ever asked me out to dances and stuff - I just got teased. I started wearing clothing to cover up my body where people couldn't see my legs and arms.
I was a very healthy eater with a large appetite and had no medical conditions causing this.

At about age 17 or so, I started working out a a local gym. I figured if I couldn't gain fat then I would build up muscle. I trained really really hard for about a year and then became discouraged. I had lost what little body fat I had and just toned up. I then decided to hire a personal trainer and saw a nutritionist and got myself on a good schedule to bulk up. I was soooo excited. I was taking everything over the counter you could think of to gain weight. At one time I was on a daily calorie and protein intake that would make you scared.

By about age 22 I gave up. I had had my first child and didn't gain an ounce. During my pregnacy with her I looked like a toothpick with a basketball on it. I finally came to grips with who I was and what I was going to look like for the rest of my life. Some people looked good, some were fat and I was skinny.

Since then I have married twice and had another child. I worked in an office for 8 years or so and listened to all kinds of shit from the women. Comments like "you need to start eating more", "GOD, your sooo skinny", "You make me sick", "You need to put on some weight", etc etc. There were times when rumors would start about my being anorexic or bilimic. Since I had learned to live with being skinny, I had slowly learned to love myself and not be insecure about my weight anymore. Therefore, I dressed how I wanted to and walked and talked more confident. They misinterputed this to think that I enjoyed being this weight. They had no idea of what I'd been through my whole life.

I remember really ticking of a woman one day (who had commented to me once) and said to her "GOD your FAT! You need to loose some weight!" She look dumbfounded and replied "excuse me?!" and I asked her how it felt!

I don't know why but about a year ago those old feelings I had about myself started coming out again. As if they had never left but were just being hid. Once again I was sick of what I was. I kept telling myself I was sick of not being able to wear low cut tops. Sick of my size 1 & 3 jeans looking like baggies. Sick and tired of my hip bones and rib bones sticking out. Sick of looking at myself in shorts and seeing chicken legs.
So, last April I got a boob job. Went from flat as a board to a nice round firm 34B (full B). About 3 weeks ago got ahold of some juice (won't go into details of what and how much right now). Three weeks ago I weighed exactly what I have weighed since highschool---exactly 99 lbs (I am 5'4") except for during pregnancy of course. And today I weight 109! I have been working out as hard as I can push myself for awhile now and there are absolutely NO WORDS to express how I feel now. I've spent 34 years hating this bull shit and have finally found an answer!!! I can fill in my size 3 Levi's now and put on a low top sexy blouse and feel like a million dollars!! I am STILL in sooo much shock that I actully gained some weight.

I agree there a ton of people out there with eating disorders. And there are probably a very small handful of people like me who hate life here on the skinny side. But I just wanted to tell you my story and remind everyone that there is always a CHANCE that that skinny women you run across someday in the grocery store or wherever, might just be be a very unhappy camper on the inside.

ANYHOW, Nice board. I'm sure I'll stick around. Like I said, I have been reading for awhile just trying to get to know everyone. Now that I'm actually registered in I'm sure I'll start posting.

Good night!!!


||206.102.26.97||reg|| Z||000001||bikinimom||01-27-2001||07:48 AM||bikinimom@elitefitness.com||Hi fit....and welcome.

The particular thread your are refering to was veeeeeeeeeery long and I know, I, myself, skip past a lot of the posts on such longs threads....especially if they seem long-winded...kind of like MY OWN, hehe. But since you do NOT exercise for countless hours daily, and you do NOT withhold nourishment from your body because you are terrified the scale may move up a pound or two I would hardly say that YOU ARE THE SCARY SHIT! (I had posted pics up, but took them down because many of the people from my gym have been invited recently to visit this site...and if my ex-training partner's husband saw his wife's pic he would probably have me "disappeared" hehe - no control going on in THAT relationship....yet another topic. I SERIOUSLY DOUBT THAT U LOOKED LIKE THE WOMAN IN THE PICS I PUT UP!)


Being skinny in and of itself is NOT what my originating post or what the pursuing thread was about. It was about WARPED BODY IMAGE and how women DAMAGE THEMSELVES BECAUSE OF IT!

My children are naturally VERY SKINNY....I have difficulty finding clothing to fit them...I'm talking NOT AN OUNCE OF FAT. I have been accused on many occasions of manipulating their diets in order to keep them this way and it REALLY BURNS MY ASS! They have healthy appetites and I offer them a variety of nourishing foods IN ADDITION to cookies, ice cream, ring-dings and yes, the occasional ho-ho! However, they have amazingly high metabolisms and though they are constantly eating...they eat normally smaller portions and DO NOT sit still for a minute! It tires me out just to watch them - LOL!!!!

I do understand your frustration then. Not that I, myself, personally feel it, but because I see what my children feel......and guess what? My oldest got it in her head that SHE WAS TOO FAT! We took care of THAT RIGHT QUICK!....as a matter of fact, her teacher has invited me to the class to speak with the girls.....but that is another topic altogether.

Anyways, I am very glad to have you here and I invite ALL perspectives. No one person has all of the answers, no one person holds all the knowledge in the universe. So then, because we are here to learn from each other.......let the lessons begin!!!!

PS.....I am happy to hear that you are happy w/your body and its newly gained MASS! THAT IS ALWAYS MUSIC TO MY EARS!

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....beauty knows no pain.||24.4.252.80||reg|| Z||000002||fistfullofsteel||01-27-2001||11:15 AM||vincent-sky@excite.com||bump||209.191.59.185||reg|| Z||000003||Val||01-27-2001||10:33 PM||littlev@yeayea.com||Sorry to falme you fit, but.....
If you would have read B Moms whole post you'd have known that she wasnt trying to
degrade us skinney minneys.

She was pointing out that some people are who excercise excessively,and dont eat right, even though they look like twigs, must have a problem of some sort.

I have the same problem you do.So I just eat eat eat, and lift lift lift.||24.22.77.34||reg|| Z||000004||Fit||01-27-2001||11:32 PM||||No flame taken! I didn't misread her post.
I just wanted to let everyone know about the few handful of us out there on the other side of the line of the perfect body, that's all. I didn't mean that maybe that skinny woman SHE was referring to might not like being that way. Just wanted to make myself and people like me known.

Perhaps I worded things wrong.

Anyhow, this is a really nice board. Only bad thing is not much traffic.
Well, gotta yr old screaming at me
Catch ya'll later!!!!||206.102.26.99||reg|| Z||000005||Val||01-27-2001||11:51 PM||littlev@yeayea.com||Give this a thought.
If she didnt want to be that way why would she be doing that much cardio,and why would she be an arobics instructor.

I think maybe your talkng about yourself.You say the same thing even though you know the thread was not about "overly skinney people". It was about "overly obsessed people".

Maybe you dont like your body, because your skinney. Whatever, your working on that because you want to look different. I'm doing the same thing. Your not trying to get even skinnier are you? No.. Thats what that woman is doing. She's obsessed. She has a problem. She's setting a bad example to the women she trains.||24.22.77.34||reg|| Z||000007||new@gettinbig||01-28-2001||10:27 AM||j1fit1@hotmail.com||Hi and welcome to the board I am glad to hear you are making progress and getting where you would like to be. I have an Aunt who eats more than most of the men I know, I am talking she uses half a tub of butter for mashed potatoes!! And she is thin, and a lot of her aquaintances which most are overweight etc, think she has an eating disorder. Which she does not, far from it. Never been able to gain weight her whole life. (Dont we wish we all had this problem) But in our society today so many women are pushed to their limits and feel forced to be this thin rail in order to look good and be of society's standards. So most women do have some sort of eating disorder, but there are those who eat the house and they are just thin for some reason or another. So there are 2 sides and they must be taken into consdieration. It seems to get worse as you look on the television and these women get thinner and thinner each year I hope you continue to grow and reach the goals you have set for yourself. And don't let people get you down, nor listen to their comments. They have their own issues and insecurties to deal with as well.||152.163.197.198||reg|| Z||000008||sillygirl||01-28-2001||01:10 PM||||Fit...Thank you for sharing your story. It is good to hear your perspective especially being the type of individual that has been struggling with trying to gain weight.

We hear so much about people trying to lose weight and the unhealthy ways they go about doing it. Your thoughts will give us another means to help people we come across in our journey towards a well fit body and a healthy mind.

sillygirl

||64.132.11.3||reg|| Z||000009||bikinimom||01-28-2001||01:35 PM||bikinimom@elitefitness.com||THANK U F1!

I thought for a minute there I was going a bit over the deep end w/my feelings on the sitch w/the instructor. I thought that perhaps because of my own past and my fear of my daughters getting pulled into this NEGATIVE BULLSHIT that I was overreacting. Because of your strong post I see now that I was my alarm was justified.

I am always open to the thoughts and viewpoints of others. I do NOT have all the answers and I hardly have a clue when it comes to many, MANY topics.....however, I feel better now that someone with your credentials and experience has backed me up on this.

For this I am very grateful.

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WWW.BIKINIMOM.COM

....beauty knows no pain.||24.4.252.80||reg|| Z||000010||Wombat||01-28-2001||04:16 PM||||We live in the fattest country in the world---Other countries laugh at how overweight america is. We are now effecting the other countries with our garbage(Burger king --McD, etc)WE are trying to globelize the earth and make the other countries just like ours. We are the most stressed out people in the world--and for that we are always on the go--so for lots, it is fast food and no real exercise. Our teachers, doctors,therapist,fireman,policeman are actors,actresses, mothers and fathers are the role models and the majority are overweight. If you dont think so then you do not live in america. You are now seeing 200 plus pound woman in TV and everyone is saying its about time---we need more. That just so one can justify their weight control. Thats the silliest thing Ive heard. These woman have eating disorders too. Look at the circus show opera put herself threw and to justify her weight she says she just accepts it(you dont think she would love to be thin)Look at the shit people put her threw ----Im a 240- pound man--and if I dont get my 7 meals in a day, then I feel small- You dont think thats a disorder --(please) Bodybuilders are far from the healthest people to walk the earth. In alot of cases its just the opp. Heart disease is a major problem in this country and for most it isnt because they were too thin. I agree that their are some people that are to thin and doing things to hurt their bodies to get their but the real problem is the majority(fat people). They are also doing things to hurt their bodies and that is a major problem. Thin people are now becoming the freaks because of a world full of fat people. This is just my opinion so take it easy on me. Peace||24.4.254.75||reg|| Z||000011||new@gettinbig||01-28-2001||04:42 PM||j1fit1@hotmail.com||I agree that America is very fat, there is no question, but starving yourself to be thin and looking like a pile of bones with skin is not healthy at all! Americans are lazy so we eat whatever is convienant and fast. And granted it keeps getting worse, more people are becoming overweight. And that is a problem and it is unhealthy, but so is starving yourself and exercising multiple times a day. Society goes from one extreme to the next...Being very overweight, and so thin that its disgusting, there is no middle which seems acceptable. There are several different types of disorders, being overly thin and taking drastic measures to get there, and using food as comfort and binging to help deal with stress and emotions. It goes both ways yes, and is very unhealthy. I would have to disagree with your comment about someone not eating their full 7 meals and feeling small. It requires a lot of fuel in order for people to exercise and maintain their builds. I eat 6-7 times a day and if I don't I feel sluggish and HUNGRY!! They aren't huge meals but small meals throughout the day. Which I think is healthier than starving myself and eating a salad, or eating Krispy Creme doughnuts and eating myself into oblivion!!

[This message has been edited by new@gettinbig (edited January 28, 2001).]||205.188.192.47||reg|| Z||000012||riptchick||01-28-2001||04:58 PM||riptchick@operamail.com||Wombat, I am not sure what point you are trying to make. Americans are far from the most stressed out. If you have ever been to any third world countries or to the middle east you would know what I am talking about. Real stress encompasses whether or not you and your children will get shot in border skirmishes today. Or whether or not you will eat today at all. We are quite lucky to live here.

Secondly, no one is arguing that a naturally thin person is unhealthy. The cause for concern has been that people who should have the knowledge to teach others how to be healthy are following a very unhealthy lifestyle. The reasons for the unhealthy lifestyles are just as complex and far-reaching as this topic is and cannot be pinpointed down to just one cause. (media, poor self esteem, abuse etc.)

I don't believe that the bodybuilding lifestyle is unhealthy at all. Quite the contrary as a matter of fact. There will UNDOUBTEDLY always be people who live in the extremes and yes, I am sure there are unhealthy BBs. But, the nature of bodybuilding is predicated on building a strong healthy body. Anytime you take anything to the extreme it is unhealthy. No one is claiming that thin people are unhealthy but thin people who exercise to lose bodyfat that simply just isn't there and operate on the premise that they are "fat"--that's unhealthy.||24.247.50.194||reg|| Z||000013||Wombat||01-28-2001||06:01 PM||||riptchick-When I say that americans are more stressed then any other it is because of the pressures that we put on our selfs. Because of the things that are available to us, does not mean it comes with out pressures--Its just the opp. The more things that one can obtain creates stress on ones body. Watch the news and think about the rollar coaster ride your emotions go on. That has an effect on your body. We have the same pressures these 3rd world countries have, ours are just more complexed. We have one of highest suicide rates in the world, WE are shown so many diff. views. Alot of other countries are shown one view and that is all they know. Well Im getting off my point but I agree with all of you on people who stave themselves and overtrain their bodies---I for one can understand how one would do this --I just think the scarry shit is all of these overeaters that are taken over this country.||24.4.254.75||reg|| Z||000014||WarLobo||01-29-2001||01:18 AM||warlobo@operamail.com||I'll get back to this later.... damn eyes cant read all this in one sitting.

Fit, wecome to the Elite of the boards.... Hell, I've been waiting for a YEARS to assist in bulking a lady up!!!!!!!!!!!

WHooooo HOooooo!

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LAte

Lobo||152.163.197.198||reg|| Z||000015||The Shadow||01-29-2001||10:28 AM||slhendricks@ziplip.com||Fit - hello and welcome!! ||166.102.54.94||reg|| Z||000016||skydancer||01-29-2001||12:22 PM||skydancer43@hotmail.com||Hello Fit and welcome! Watch out 'cause if Lobo has his way with you he will make you the biggest mofo on this board...he he he...naturally thin or not!! Thank you for sharing your story. Body image issues are painful whether its fat ones or thin ones! Good luck on your current bulk cycle and keep us posted!

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Patience is a bitter plant, but it has sweet fruit.
Well done is better than well said.||63.93.71.18||reg|| Z||000017||FitFossil||01-29-2001||12:25 PM||||Fit,

Welcome to the board. Please don't think we're calling all skinny people "scary shit"! What is scary is when women (and even some men) deliberately starve their bodies in an attempt to look like the unusually thin images worshipped by the media. While it is true that some people are naturally thin and blessed with a high metabolism, this is not true for most people, including a good number of those models and actresses.

It is scary when people work so hard NOT to make their bodies stronger, but rather to beat themselves into an image unrealistic for their body type. A few people die in the process, but so many more are just squandering their lives and health unnecessarily because of the media brainwashing - that's the scary shit.

||152.42.20.50||reg|| Z||000018||bikinimom||01-29-2001||12:40 PM||bikinimom@elitefitness.com||Thank U FitFossil - I could NOT have said it better myself!

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....beauty knows no pain.||24.4.252.64||reg|| Z||000019||Checkmatebloated||01-30-2001||06:31 PM||patch1971@hushmail.com||you people talk an awful lot.||167.127.163.201||reg||