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A New Beginning

Group Created by OneBreath

Support group for EF members recovering from addictions and/or disorders.

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  1. trex74
    22-Feb-2010 09:57 AM
    trex74
    So I went to a meeting on Saturday, and plan to go to that one evey week now. I hadn't been since August! I saw some old pals and since it was a discussion meeting shared a bit, and it felt really good.
    Back in the game now. Now I just have to reconnect with my sponsor...
  2. trex74
    20-Feb-2010 09:31 PM
    trex74
    I notice that too, nef. My destructive behaviours all come from the same place. Fear and anxiety could trigger a craving to self-medicate, or to self-harm, or both. Either way, it is looking for a solution to stop feeling my feelings because I get scared that they will overwhelm me.
    I hope lent is a peaceful time for you.
  3. nefertiti
    So I decided to give up alcohol for lent. Should be interesting. One thing I notice about myself is when I start being self destructive in one area, it bleeds into others. It will be easier for me to stay on track if I am eliminating all possible destructive behaviors. Usually social drinking is not an issue for me, but when I'm struggling like I am right now, and I start drinking to self medicate, it obviously becomes an issue.
  4. sober1
    19-Feb-2010 02:10 PM
    sober1
    All those are good, usually one or the other is more "to the point" during the course of ones day.
    "But for the grace of God" is one that I can see everyday, everyday. In the beginning of ones sobreity, "easy does it" is very important. we get our fiirst sober days put together and we head out to right all our wrongs in one week. that simply can't be done. It took years for us to get to that point, it will take months and sometimes years to get them back to about where they were. instead of going on this "crusade" to set things right, keep doing the litttle things that set you on the right track, i.e., making meetings, sharing in meetings, etc. you have to keep all that going, and then take baby steps toward making ammends. If the truth be known, you working a program of recovery is MORE than enough amends for most of the people we hurt. They just want us to be well, if you geta chance after a while, you may extend your hand. But before you do, just remember that they may not take it, they have been burned MANU times before and have the right ti be sckeptical, even with you this time. They have that right. You need to just keep doing the right thing, then the next right thing, then the next right thing. Not taking into consideration of what their ption of you is. If your motives are right, your going to reap the benefits no matter if you are aware of it or not.
    I like topoint out something about the 1st step, it's not a slogan, but it kinda falls into todays talk. It says "admitting that I was powerless over alcohol(Drugs)... The opperative word, WAS. I was powerless, meaning that now that you have stopped putting the poison in you, you now HAVE power. In haveing that [power, you can now choose to change, or not. Too many people think that once the alcohol/drug has you, your always powerless, that not so. You choose whether to let it have the power again or not. If it doesn;t dross your lips, snort up your nose, or pinned in a vein, it's doesn't yield any power. So, what we do to give ourselves the power abd keep it is up to us. Willpower won't work. just being abstinant won't work, atleast for long, so.... what do we do? Do what has worked for thousands of others. At first it's just not drink/drug, get to a meeting and be open to suggestions. If we see that being open to the suggestions yields results, then me MUST be willing to believe that a power greater than yourself can and will save you if he is sought. Openmindedness, willingness, and letting God do for you what you could not do for yourself.
    Be openminded, be willing to go to any length to get what the others have. Give back to others what others have given you.

    thanks for letting me share. I love each and everyone of you. ( even the people who won't post because then we can see you, and the ones who come here just to read) We're all God's children, and we weren't made bad people, but we made ourselves sick people, and now we want to get well.
  5. sober1
    19-Feb-2010 01:32 PM
    sober1
    I don't know much about Facebook, I KNOW what it is, not how it works internally. If it was a big enough issue, I would think that they have a way to clear out all your personal info. that may be something that you want to investigate Nef, idk. I would think that they have this kind of situation daily, ex's and such, they prolly could give you some peace of mind about that. Thanks for deleting it, about what he wrote, to hell with him. (I cleaned that up). Do you have a protective order or anything Nef, or did you have one at one time? If you do, or can get one, I'd look into it. I know that they contain language that stops them from communicating with you on any level. I don't know your situation, so it may not be feasable. I DO know that getting an IP address is easy enough for the police.
  6. trex74
    19-Feb-2010 10:49 AM
    trex74
    Here is a great resource worth bookmarking.
    Chapter 5, "How It Works" is a good intro into the 12 Steps
    http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/
  7. trex74
    19-Feb-2010 10:35 AM
    trex74
    I was thinking about the AA slogans, and how they apply to my life.
    For anyone who is curious, some of them are:
    "But for the Grace of God"
    "First Things First"
    "Think Think Think"
    "Live and Let Live"
    "Easy Does It"
    My favourite one is "Live and Let Live". Because if I get judgemental about how somebody else lives their life, then I am not paying enough attention to mine.
    I have had major issues in the past with family members, and it was very easy to criticize them and then justify picking up a drink or drug to ease the pain that "they had caused me".
    It is not easy, but I have established healthy boundaries, and it is up to me not to react or get sucked into drama.
    I didn't know how to do that in the past-it is a learned behaviour for me, and every now and then, I still fall back into having expectations of people, and feeling disappointed when they don't live up to them.
    Anybody else have opinions on the slogans?
    feel free to refer to ones I haven't listed that are important to YOU
  8. nefertiti
    Sober....I deleted it...but facebook gives you a little preview of the message whether you want it or not, so I got the gist of it ("Hiding from me? tsk tsk"). The harm that can be done is he's a brilliant hacker and I'm scared he'll hack into my page and find out where I am and what I'm doing. Then he'll start showing up at my safe places, contacting my friends, etc. I went through a lot of trouble to hide myself from him on facebook, right down to not using my last name.

    Trex, I've done OA, but with my work schedule it's just impossible to get to meetings. I work till 8 or 9 almost every night and on weekends I'm teaching scuba.

    It wasn't a full relapse...but I did purge that one time and I did drink myself into a stupor so I could handle logging into my inbox and deleting that message. Thank god I am moving soon, but I'll be glancing over my shoulder for him till then.
  9. sober1
    18-Feb-2010 02:33 PM
    sober1
    something something something credited response, whatever tech-heads say. excellent post Trex. thank you for that....
    take what you need and leave the rest, it's a great summary of experience and choices....
  10. trex74
    18-Feb-2010 11:54 AM
    trex74
    For anyone who needs help- if you think you might have a problem:
    www.aa.org for help with your drinking
    www.na.org for help with drugs
    http://www.eatingdisordersanonymous.org for help with an eating disorder
    www.oa.org for help with compulsive eating

    for other 12 step groups which I haven't mentioned, there is a list of them at:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_twelve-step_groups

    AA has worked for me, I have not been to the other groups, but they are founded on the same basic principles of the 12 steps.

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